One of the most unexpected and surprising observations I’ve made as the result of many conversations with women standing for marriage restoration, is their reaction when they finally overcome the sense of desperation that once threatened to destroy them, and experience peace and joy for the first time in a long time. And the most amazing thing about it is that it’s something we ALL experienced soon after finding the very peace and joy Jesus came to give us! After the initial flood of relief that rushes over us, there seems to be an inevitable sense of guilt, or even fear that we’ve stopped loving our spouses, and that God is not pleased with us! Yet every one of us have probably heard 1 Corinthians 7:15 (NKJV) at some time or another, which says But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such
cases. But God has called us to peace. So why is it that when we FINALLY reach that God glorifying place of letting our spouses depart and living in peace, instead of recognizing the awesome work of God in our lives and hearts, we feel guilty and totally forget the part about not being under bondage? There’s only one answer, and that’s SATAN! He can’t stand it when our lives reflect the power and glory of Jesus Christ and when the world sees us living in peace and joy in the midst of our marital storms! He can’t stand it when our friends, families and co-workers see the miraculous transformation that takes place in our hearts and demeanor as we put our faith and confidence in the Lord and go about our lives with genuine peace and joy! Why? Because that is exactly what draws people out of his kingdom of darkness into God’s glorious and wonderful kingdom of light, confirming 1 Peter 2:9, which says But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. So for Satan, it’s a fight for the hearts, minds, souls, lives and eternal destination of the countless number of people who will be touched by seeing the peace we have found through knowing and experiencing the love and power of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, including our spouses and children! That’s why I’m so distressed by how that particular verse is terribly misrepresented and perverted by Christian leaders today. Because believing and teaching that God tells us to let our spouses go and move on with our lives, only serves to further Satan’s plan to kill and destroy the marriages God said NO man should put asunder! And it
denies the kingdom of God the power and glory of restored marriage testimonies, which Satan wants to prevent, because he knows they will be used to overcome him and hurl him down, based on Revelation 12:10-11, which says Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say: “Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Christ. For the accuser of our brothers, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death. So when we reach that place of peace and joy Jesus came to give us, we should rejoice and praise the Lord and glorify His name by refusing to let Satan steal what our precious Savior paid such a dear price to give us!

And I strongly suspect this is another “just for someone” post today, because even though I saw programs I really liked this morning; when it came time to write my post for the day, I had a TOTALLY blank mind/screen! And it’s very unusual for me to make it to the afternoon without a pretty good idea of what I’m writing about, but that was not the case today. If I didn’t know how the Lord works, I might have been concerned, but I was sure the Lord would reveal it in time, even though it looked like He was waiting to the very last minute! And since I didn’t have a post to work on yet, I took advantage of the “free” time and decided to finish reading Judy Rousseau’s message from yesterday, which she sent out late and which I didn’t get a chance to finish because of interruptions. And when I read her response to a question from one of the “partners”, I thought “That would be a very good topic for a post…especially since it ties into conversations I’ve had with some of the fellowship members over the past few days.” Then I took several phone calls and answered a couple of emails that required responses, and just before settling down to write my post, which I already had pretty well set in my mind, I checked the private sites to see if anything needed my attention. So imagine my surprise and delight when a member had JUST shared something in “Heart To Heart” about the exact same topic I had in mind! The only reason I share these details is so someone knows and is encouraged by the lengths the Lord has gone to just to speak to them in their time of need!

I believe sharing the following messages help illustrate how Satan can turn our stand for marriage restoration into a snare of bondage if we let him, and the best ways to avoid that. So here’s Judy Rousseau’s message from yesterday.

“Here’s another Frequently Asked Question sent in by one of our partners:
Did you think about your spouse/situation constantly or were you able to pray and then completely leave it alone?

I did think of Paul and the situation I was in frequently. However I found that when my husband and my circumstances were my focus, I lost my sense of peace and joy and got caught up in worry and anxiety. There were times that I had to make a conscious CHOICE to keep my mind and thoughts STAYED ON THE LORD, taking every thought captive to His Word and will. I also found it helpful to get out and be with people. Occasionally those people were people who had needs that I could minister comfort and love to. Other times those precious souls set a place at their family table for me and just kinda took me in.

My prayers were varied, at times they were intense, fervent and desperate and other times merely a “Lord please just continue the good work You have begun.” Much of my prayer time was spent quoting and claiming the promises I found in scripture over my life. Because the Lord had spoken very clearly to me about bringing me through to GREAT VICTORY, I was able to let go of much of my fear and anxiety. His grace
was truly upon me and I know that I never would have made it through that time without His hand constantly leading me.”

If you would like to receive Judy’s daily (Monday-Friday) messages of encouragement, please send a message to hope4marriages-subscribe@associate.com and reply to the server notice to confirm your subscription. Hope for Hurting Marriages is a ministry of encouragement for men and women who are praying for the restoration of their marriages and families.

And here’s the message shared on the ladies private fellowship website this afternoon:

“(name omitted), I had to respond to a statement you made in a response to my prayer request this past Sunday, 1/21. In your responding post you said, “I have an almost “I don’t care” feeling, because God is working. And God is being the husband that I need at this very moment.” I thought I was going to do a happy dance, because I too have had and am still having that same “I don’t care” feeling. It is very liberating. It’s not that I don’t love my husband. I do. And I desire him to repent and be restored to the Lord first, and to return home to his wife and kids. But, right now… I don’t care as much. It’s not a priority. For a minute I thought something was wrong with me because I wasn’t “upset” and “fretting” over my situation, and I thought am I the only one who feels this way? I’m so accustomed to those emotions, and now I have the greatest sense of peace and joy! It is amazing. I do my best to keep my mind on Jesus and not my husband. God has been my husband for the past several months. He has covered, protected, provided, guided, and sustained me in ways unimaginable. He has met my every need. I tell you, when my husband comes home, he’s got a big pair of shoes to fill (lol).
Yes, God is my husband for this season and I love him and thank Him.
Glad to know I’m not alone out here….
Love you (name omitted) and I’m standing and praying right along with you.
(name omitted) in Virginia”

And here’s the response I posted on the private site:

“ME TOO! And I know for a fact several of the other ladies feel the exact same way! One of the ladies I talked to this past weekend said that she had felt guilty, because she wasn’t feeling so burdened for the restoration of her marriage and wasn’t praying for her husband the same way she had been…with the same urgency…so she started making herself do it again. And then she was depressed and lost the sense of peace she had finally found! Well, as I told her, that couldn’t be of the Lord! We never stop praying for our husbands or standing for the restoration of our marriages, but we can not allow that to consume our lives. I think that’s what it means to let them go; that we’re not under BONDAGE; and that we’re called to live in peace. So Satan can even turn our burden to pray into bondage and use it to steal the peace we find by RESTING AND TRUSTING in the Lord! God wants us to put all of our focus on Him, and when it is necessary, He WILL give us the burden we need to pray for our husbands beyond the prayers we should always be praying for them, which is for the power of the Holy Spirit to move in their heart and circumstances to draw them into right relationship with the Lord and to restore our marriages…for the glory of the Lord! And I think we should remember to pray for the Lord to send angels to guard and protect them, and to guide and direct them. And there may be other particular prayers the Lord puts on each of our hearts, but I do NOT believe He means for us to lose our peace, HIS PEACE, because of the burden we have to pray for our husbands and to stand for the restoration of our marriages. We’re to live our lives in such a way that those who ARE watching just can’t believe what the Lord is doing in us and for us. They should want exactly what we have, and no one will want discouragement, desperation and depression! They want the righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, which Jesus told us the kingdom of God is really all about! Excellent topic, (name omitted)! Thanks! In fact, I might make this the topic for my SOF post today, since I know it is such a common experience for many of the women I talk to!”

So there’s nothing wrong with experiencing the peace and joy that comes only when we truly trust and rely on our Lord and Savior. In fact, I’m pretty sure that’s what God meant in Psalm 46:10, when He told us “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” And we should find a great deal of comfort, peace and reassurance in the promise found in Proverbs 21:30, which says There is no wisdom, no insight, no plan that can succeed against the LORD. So we should never let Satan steal the peace and victory we have in Jesus, by making our faithful obedience to stand for the restoration of our marriages cause us to live in bondage of any kind. Remember that Jesus came to set the captives free, not to put us under bondage, so be blessed and encouraged, and make the most of the peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, which is the abundant life He came to give us.

Posted Tuesday, January 23rd, 2007 at 10:54 pm in Seeds Of Faith.