Complete Surrender Leads to Peace and Contentment
Regular visitors to the website know how excited I tend to get when I see the Lord working on a particular theme; when the same topic comes up over and over again, repeatedly confirming the point God is trying to get across. Well, we’ve certainly had a theme at work in the ministry the past few days and it is very clearly complete surrender leads to God’s peace and contentment in all circumstances…THEN GOD WORKS MIRACULOUSLY! God is really on the move in our midst again, so I can’t wait to see what happens next!
As with all things, working in marriage restoration ministry has it’s ups and downs, and one of the greatest disappointments for me personally is seeing any of the FAM Fellowship members fall away; wrongly thinking that their marriage is beyond salvation and restoration and giving up on God. But if we don’t receive the faith and understanding needed in our spirit through the power of God’s Word and the Holy Spirit, we just won’t have the grace and anointing needed to withstand everything the devil brings against us to deceive us into believing that, which causes doubt and discouragement. So when that happens, there’s nothing to do about it other than pray and trust that seeds of truth (God’s Word) were planted and that they will bring forth a harvest at some time in the future. And that’s exactly what happened both yesterday and today!
One of the earliest FAM Fellowship members I hadn’t heard from in months called yesterday, and we talked for a very long time. She called to thank me for the things she had learned through the ministry and to update me on how the Lord has been working in her heart and life and in her relationship with her husband. As shared in two messages posted by other members on the private websites yesterday and today, she finally realized that she had to COMPLETELY surrender everything to God and agree to do things HIS way, because the consequences of not doing so had in fact become very dangerous and costly. It was such a blessing to hear her testimony of God’s amazing grace, mercy and faithfulness; how He continued to speak to her and woo her, even though she was not living in any way that would possibly please Him. But when He got her attention, He REALLY got it, and she FINALLY surrendered everything to Him and made a decision to do things HIS way no matter what! And she said that she couldn’t believe how it seemed that the very minute she made that decision, God started working in her husband’s heart too! It’s a very long testimony, but the bottom line is that she is now firmly and confidently standing for her marriage NO MATTER WHAT, and TRUSTING that God WILL restore it! In just a matter of a couple of weeks, the Lord has totally changed her relationship with her husband from one of two people filled with anger and rage, unforgiveness and bitterness into one of two people who now understand and appreciate how special they are to each other as they experience and enjoy genuine friendship and companionship again! And that all started when she humbled herself and shared with her husband everything the Lord had revealed to her about how much she had hurt him and the “baggage” she had brought into their marriage. She is very much in awe of what she’s seen the Lord do, and most of all, the peace and contentment she now has because she let it all go and is ready to do and accept whatever God’s will is for her life. She said one thing that just totally blows her away is how God REALLY changes hearts, which she knows He did for her and which He is now doing for her husband…and how fast things can totally turn around! That’s why it’s SO important to wait, because God is ALWAYS working, even when we can’t see it, and when the time is right, what He has been doing behind the scenes will be revealed and we won’t believe it. But if we give up, we’ll never see it. That doesn’t mean that it wasn’t done; just that we didn’t wait long enough for it to be revealed.
Then again today, another one of the earlier FAM Fellowship members that I hadn’t heard from in a long time, called to update me on how the Lord has been working In her life and in her relationship with her husband. Her testimony was very similar in that she finally realized that she HAD to let everything go, and that she couldn’t believe the peace she found when she did and how the Lord had totally changed her in the process. And, just as with the woman who called yesterday, she said she couldn’t believe how her husband’s attitude toward her changed miraculously just as soon as she let things go and decided to stop trying to “manage” everything herself! She wanted to share with me that for the first time in a long time, they were on the phone today, laughing and joking with each other, which she just couldn’t believe! This was another relationship where she had done a GREAT deal of damage – even to the point of her husband accusing her of attempted murder!
So an important lesson learned and proven by these calls, in addition to another one just like them last month, is that GOD’S GRACE IS SUFFICIENT!!! If we don’t give up, no matter how bad things look, God CAN and WILL turn things around IN HIS TIME! So not waiting, giving up on God, is the one thing that can keep our marriages from being restored. But when we surrender our will and put all of our trust in God, we will experience peace and be content to wait, just as Dan and Thursa attest to in the following posts, which they shared on the private websites yesterday and today respectively, for which I appreciate their permission to share here. As I consider the testimonies of the two ladies I talked to yesterday and today, and what Dan and Thursa have shared, I’m reminded of Matthew 11:28-29, where Jesus bids us “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. That certainly sounds like confirmation that if we surrender completely to Jesus Christ, we will know the peace and contentment that comes only from an intimate relationship with Him, and there’s certainly no better way to be blessed and encouraged!
This past Saturday, I attended graduation celebrations for two of my nieces. And one year ago, I attended the graduation celebration for my son. What a difference a year makes – and a closer walk with God!
My son’s high school graduation celebration last year was held in conjunction with several other boys – perhaps about 10, and I had just moved out of our house two weeks before the event. It was held at a bar and grill in our town, and what should have been an exciting and wonderful celebration was a dreaded and horrible experience for me. I felt completely out of place, as my wife flitted around the party like nothing was wrong. Yet, all of our friends and family knew the situation. I ended up “coping” with it by drinking too much and leaving early to avoid further suffering and pain. But before I left, I some how ended up with my wife’s purse! Being a little soused, I noticed her cell phone in her purse, and took it out. Something whispered to me, and I don’t think it was the Holy Spirit, but the jealousy that was raging through me at that point; and I rang the NCP’s number. I didn’t say a word, and just hung up when he answered. I guess I just wanted him to know that I, and not he, was at my son’s graduation party with my wife. Well, in all actuality, I was not with my wife either. Of course, you might well imagine how that all turned out; the phone call was not the wisest decision I ever made. Although I may get the giggles thinking about it now, I certainly don’t recommend anyone doing anything like that!
I’m sharing this now, because this weekend I realized how much I have grown in the spirit and my relationship with God. I am not where I need to be, but thank God I am not where I was, and I am on my way to being what He wants me to be! I have learned to say no to my “self” and yes to God. I had God’s love in my heart, but it was buried under personal ambitions, cares, and problems. I was trying to take care of my problems instead of letting God do it. In order to be healed I had to have a listening, receptive heart or I would not have seen any measure of restoration or any other of God’s blessings in my life.
And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.
Romans 5:5 (New Living Translation)
Disappointment would have always been the norm if my eyes were on men and not my Lord. God, and only God, can restore what has been lost, because it takes His miracle power to do it. I released God to work when I released my faith in Him. But I had to surrender to the will of God, which is to restore and heal the covenant marriage He put together. Dugh…what took me so long?
Well, that is where I have grown and learned. Believing, trusting, and being obedient to God was, and is not easy for me. However, I have come to believe from the scriptures, that Jesus is the answer for all things. He goes out ahead of us and makes a way for us.
5 “Is it not my family God has chosen?
Yes, he has made an everlasting covenant with me.
His agreement is arranged and guaranteed in every detail.
He will ensure my safety and success.
2 Samuel 23:5 (New Living Translation)
When something in life looks impossible or unpleasant, Jesus is there to pave the way for us to move forward. But I had to put serious effort into studying the Word if I intended to get anything out of it, and I have truly discovered that the more I invest in His Word, prayer, and worship the more He is there for me. God can’t reveal things to me if I do not make myself available to Him. So I have learned to submit myself to His will as He reveals it to me. (See 2 Samuel 22:19-37 below)
As I reread about Mary in Luke and how the angel came to her about the virgin birth, I saw how readily she was willing to agree with God’s promise and accept it. And then the miracle happened. So what I face today requires me to make a decision to agree with God and His promises and then expect the Holy Spirit to bring it to pass; thus our miracles! God’s strength is made available to the believing heart, and as we believe, He brings us to places we could never reach on our own, although I almost died trying!!
34 Mary asked the angel, “But how can this happen? I am a virgin.”
35 The angel replied, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the baby to be born will be holy, and he will be called the Son of God.
Luke 1:34-35 New Living Translation (NLT)
Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
Proverbs 3:5 (New Living Translation)
The power of prayer is for everyone. If we do our part, God is going to do His part every time! And we certainly know that our prayers for our marriages to be restored are indeed aligned with His will. So the more we read and understand the Word, the more we come to know God’s will, because His Word is a revelation of what it is God wants us to do. Prayer will not reach beyond His will, which is why it’s so important to understand what His will for us is. Then at the moment we pray, we are to believe that we will receive what we prayed for; not when circumstances look different; not at some point in the future, but when we pray and ask. God is there right then and has sent angels with the answer. We just have to be patient and wait for His timing, just as we have seen over and over in the FAM family.
14 And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him.
15 And since we know he hears us when we make our requests, we also know that he will give us what we ask for.
1 John 5:14-15 (New Living Translation)
As I looked around at the people at the celebrations this weekend, I was so sorrowful as I recognized the number of families who have been ravished by divorce; moms and dads sitting at different tables with new spouses, and the kids going back and forth from one “family” to the other. It broke my heart. But I was overcome with relief, because of my God, who is in control of my life and my marriage. It was as if God was pointing out to me that I must not succumb to Satan and allow him to destroy my family and my marriage. It was almost peaceful! I cannot believe the place God has brought me to, and I encourage everyone, no matter where you are in the process, to fight for your marriage. And more importantly, fight for what God has promised you; He wants His best for us and our loving spouses!!
19 They attacked me at a moment when I was in distress, but the Lord supported me.
20 He led me to a place of safety; he rescued me because he delights in me.
21 The Lord rewarded me for doing right; he restored me because of my innocence.
22 For I have kept the ways of the Lord;
23 I have followed all his regulations; I have never abandoned his decrees.
24 I am blameless before God; I have kept myself from sin.
25 The Lord rewarded me for doing right. He has seen my innocence.
26 “To the faithful you show yourself faithful; to those with integrity you show integrity.
27 To the pure you show yourself pure, but to the wicked you show yourself hostile.
28 You rescue the humble, but your eyes watch the proud and humiliate them.
29 O Lord, you are my lamp. The Lord lights up my darkness.
30 In your strength I can crush an army; with my God I can scale any wall.
31 “God’s way is perfect. All the Lord’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.
32 For who is God except the Lord? Who but our God is a solid rock?
33 God is my strong fortress, and he makes my way perfect.
34 He makes me as surefooted as a deer, enabling me to stand on mountain heights.
35 He trains my hands for battle; he strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow.
36 You have given me your shield of victory; your help[a] has made me great.
37 You have made a wide path for my feet to keep them from slipping.
2 Samuel 22:19-37 (New Living Translation)
I would like to first give God praise and honor in the wonderful ways He has shown His awesome power in my life. As Linda pointed out to me earlier today, we have come a long way from the beginning. I Praise God for every small and large step I have taken on that way. I thank God that He has taken every single step with me as I go. In fact, He hasn’t just taken the step with me, He has given me the legs and feet of strength, the courage and the spiritual armor I need to push forward to receive the tremendous blessings He has waiting for me. I am truly blessed to still have my entire family with me in my home. With that, I have had my own unique challenges and tests, which God continues to work out with me, as He shows me how I am to act and be in order for His glory to shine through me. I stumble, but I am so thankful that each and every time, God is there to pick me up, forgive me, put my tears in a bottle and then take my hand and lead me on to the next step. It brings tears to my eyes even now to think how unworthy I am of all the love and grace He continues to pour out on me. The only way I can even begin to show my love and appreciation to Him is to offer myself in complete surrender to Him. His ways are so far better than any of my ways. And I look forward to the opportunity I’ll have to share how my tests have become my complete marriage restoration testimony. I hope I am able to share it with many people, so they all may see God’s unfailing love for each of His children.
Today, I know God has answered prayers through a phone call my husband had with the NCP. I have no idea what was said or developed in that conversation; nor do I need to know. I only know about it because of a brief text my husband sent telling me they had talked. With Linda’s help and keen listening to the Holy Spirit (Thank you again, Linda), I did not respond at all to the text, and God has sent an overwhelming comfort to me in the last few minutes. The Holy Spirit has recalled many of my recent prayers and has just given me comfort that God is working and answering just as I have asked. I have peace in knowing that God’s grace IS sufficient for me. He has again taken my hand and said, “Look to me my child, for I will set your paths straight.”
Over the last day, the Holy Spirit has recalled to me over and over and OVER again Philippians 4:11-12 “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Just in the last few minutes, I now see the relevance and why I would need to hear that exact verse. Just as Paul found the “secret”, I too feel I have learned the “secret.” God’s grace is sufficient for me!!! I am completely content in my situation in waiting on God for the complete restoration of my marriage. My wait is not like being at the doctor’s office: uneventful and seemingly a waste of time. The wait I have in God is one of the most precious times in my life. So I praise and thank God that He has me right where I need to be; in His divine waiting room. I am learning so much about the unconditional love God has for me, and I want to obey Him and allow for His glory to shine in me. This is the secret; my secret to contentment is that His grace is sufficient! So I am willing and very content to wait on God and His perfect plan and timing!!!