As someone usually more focused on ministering to men and women standing for marriage restoration, it was brought to my attention last night that more care and thought might well need to be given to those on the other side of our stand; the men and women who have left their marriages and yet end up visiting our site for some reason. So I want to express my personal appreciation and welcome to everyone who visits and who are not necessarily standing for marriage restoration. I hope and pray that the lord will touch your hearts and spirits with the power and promise of His Word and that you will be blessed and never hurt by what you read here. It is never my intention to judge or hurt anyone; but one thing those of us who are now standing for the restoration of our marriages do understand is the transforming power of conviction found only in the truth of God’s Word; we truly know the power it has to totally transform our hearts, minds, spirits and lives. So we pray that you will find blessing and encouragement here as well.

I received communication from such a woman last night, who shared how many things in her life were not going well. And it brought me to tears when she shared that when she reads what is posted here, it always makes her feel that it’s because she has not been faithful. I felt such a strong sense of compassion for her and a flood of other emotions as well; but I knew the only reply that has the power to bring her any comfort or help her in any way as she seeks answers to her questions must come from the Word of God. And since she is very likely not the only one in similar circumstances visiting the website, I have been asking the Lord to give me the wisdom and words to share the truth of His Word with love and integrity.

Yet, God really didn’t seem to be giving me much as I sought His guidance about this throughout the day. I felt blocked, because all I kept getting was “love”. So finally instead of thinking there had to be more, I started meditating on how to explain the way God works to bring correction as love. Of course, the first thought that came to my mind was that God disciplines those He loves. But when I went to read it in context, I saw that I had totally forgotten the first part of that very wise counsel, because Proverbs 3:11-12 actually says My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline and do not resent his rebuke, because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in. Yet, even as men and women standing for the restoration of our marriages and families, the truth is that we often do despise and resent the Lord’s discipline and rebuke. But as I thought more about how to explain God’s discipline in terms of love, I thought of God’s awesome promise in Jeremiah 29:11, which says For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. If God’s plans for us are for good and for our best and we are on a path that would keep us from realizing His GOOD plans for us, it would obviously be loving of Him to do whatever it takes to get us back on that path. And I couldn’t help thinking of the many testimonies I’ve witnessed over the past years that really bear that out. So when we are not walking according to the path God has PREDESTINED for our lives, He often uses challenging and painful situations to get our attention and bring us to the fulfillment of that promise, which is confirmed in verses 12 and 13, which say Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Unfortunately, when life is going along pretty well and everything seems to be great, we aren’t quite so inclined to seek the Lord with all of our hearts; but when disaster strikes, we tend to turn to Him, and quite often in sheer desperation. Obviously, that’s something just about every man and woman visiting this site and standing for marriage restoration knows all to well. In fact, many of the FAM Fellowship members rededicated their lives to the Lord or were only saved after their marital problems arose, and most of us wouldn’t trade all of the pain and disappointment we’ve had to come through to get to the walk and relationship we have with Him now. BUT if not for the problems in our marriages, we wouldn’t be where we are today, so that’s a perfect example of WHY God allows things into our lives that hurt us so much; He just wants to get our attention. After all, He does command us to make HIM FIRST (Exodus 20:2-4 and Matthew 22:36-38)! Yet, very few of us really do; at least not until we have no other choice.

I have no doubt that it was not just by coincidence that as I listened to Charles Stanley’s TV broadcast about dealing with rejection this past weekend, I was especially struck when he read a passage of scripture I thought I was VERY familiar with; yet it was as if I heard it for the first time! He read Romans 8:16-18, which says The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. I couldn’t believe that I never caught the significance of what that says… we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. That’s certainly not very popular theology; yet there it is in black and white and pretty hard to disregard since it’s such a powerful and definitive statement. So I’ve actually been meditating on it for the past few days; thinking about why it is that we are so afraid and do our very best to avoid any kind of suffering. The trials and tribulations of our lives are used by God to mold and shape us into the vessels He always intended us to be for His glory, and He assures us that the things we suffer won’t even begin to compare to the glory He will reveal in us! And the Bible is full of many stories proving that it is often through terrible times of injustice and suffering that God’s perfect plans to bring blessings and glory are manifested. One of my favorites is about Joseph, who never could have or would have ended up the second most powerful man in the land if not for the jealousy of his brothers who sold him into slavery, and then the unjust accusations of a lustful woman who caused him to be thrown into prison when he righteously rebuffed her adulterous advances! When John the Baptist baptized people, he would say that he baptized by water, but that one was coming soon Who would baptize by fire (matthew 3:11). Of course, we know that was Jesus and I can’t help wondering if that refiner’s fire isn’t what John was talking about! Because it is through the fire of adversity that we truly turn our lives over to Jesus and release all of the junk that does not please him. So we are cleansed through the fires of trials and tribulations in the same way we are symbolically cleansed by baptism through immersion under water.

So adversity in our lives is NOT necessarily the result of disobedience; it may just be God’s way of getting us where He wants and needs us to be for our best and for HIS glory. Yet, it is also true that when we are disobedient and act in a manner contrary to the written Word of God, we can DEFINITELY expect to be corrected by the Lord and that we will experience adversity that IS the consequence of our sinful or disobedient ways. If God allows us to continue on a path contrary to His Word, will and plan for our lives; then He is a liar, and a mockery is made of His Word; an that’s just not going to happen (Numbers 23:19)! And when God puts it in the hearts of men and women to stand on the power and promise of His Word for the restoration of their marriages, He is not going to allow their spouses to walk away and right into the happiness they expect to find elsewhere; that too would make Him out to be a liar and a mockery of His Word, which just isn’t going to happen either! Malachi 2 makes it very clear that God HATES divorce and that He is willing to go to great lengths to uphold the marriages of faithful spouses (and even not so faithful spouses who have truly repented!) by not accepting or honoring the offering and worship of someone who has divorced a faithful spouse; and 1 Peter 3:7 even indicates that He doesn’t answer the prayers of men (and women too) who don’t live as they should with their wives! So God is SERIOUS about the covenant of marriage and He will stand with us as we stand for the full and complete restoration of our marriages and families.

So yes, it is reasonable and biblically sound to believe that God can cause our lives to spin out of control when we are not living according to the instructions found in His Word. And that’s true whether we believe it or not and the private pages of the website are filled with testimonies proving that! God’s Word will NOT be mocked and if God said it; it WILL happen! And even if it is against our own will, God has a very powerful and persuasive way of bringing us around to His way of thinking! He is a jealous God and He will not allow us to continue to put other things or people before Him or for HIS plans to be thwarted by our own or anyone else’s. As Proverbs 21:30 states; There is no wisdom, no insight, no plan that can succeed against the LORD. And while it may not seem loving from our limited human perspective when God allows so much pain and disappointment in our lives; when we understand that He has a much better plan for us, and one that WILL bring us happiness if we submit and surrender to HIS will and way, AND that He does it ALL for the glory of His son, it begins to make a lot more sense. God WILL have His way, but we get to choose whether it will be done the easy way or the hard way and the difference is based on whether we choose to be obedient or disobedient. He allows us to make that choice, but also promises that there will be consequences based on the choices we make; either life or death, and blessings or curses. And He even tells us to choose life and blessings by being obedient (Deuteronomy 30:11-20)!

But it does no good to recognize the will and ways of God if we are not going to put them into practice. And in Revelation 3:19, John wrote Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest, and repent. And when we do, we will truly be blessed and encouraged, because of God’s most awesome promise in Isaiah 55)!

Posted Wednesday, April 30th, 2008 at 11:53 pm in Seeds Of Faith.