It Just Takes One!
More than likely, most everyone standing for marriage restoration has heard more than once that if their spouse doesn’t want to “work” on the marriage, there isn’t anything they can do about it…because “it takes two.” But based on the Bible, we know that’s NOT true, because it just takes one.
When Abraham asked Sara to hide the fact that she was his wife and allowed her to be taken into the king’s palace, it isn’t too difficult to imagine the pain and anguish she experienced. She must have felt a terrible sense of betrayal, fear, shame and humiliation, anger and despair because the man who was supposed to protect her was so shamelessly willing to sacrifice her to save his own hide. BUT GOD had another plan, and it just took one; one woman submitting to her husband’s authority in faith and obedience to God! And despite Abraham’s failure to cherish and protect his wife, which was wrong in the eyes of God, Sara’s faith and obedience caused him to be blessed and enriched by the king when she was returned unharmed and fully vindicated! Sara humbled herself under the mighty hand of God and HE lifted her up in due time. So it just took one relying on the power and promise of God’s Word to bring about total deliverance and the prosperity that followed! Read Genesis 20.
When Gomer continued to indulge in adulterous behavior, presented Hosea with illegitimate children during their marriage, and eventually abandoned him and the children to openly pursue a sinful and rebellious lifestyle, the shame and humiliation must have been almost unbearable for Hosea, especially since he had only married a prostitute because God told him to. There must have been times when he questioned God’s plan and why He had asked him to do that when it all turned out so badly. BUT GOD had another plan, and it just took one; one man choosing to care for and protect his dishonorable wife in faith and obedience to God. Even though she had brought such shame to her family and was reduced to being sold on an auction block, through her husband’s reverence for God and willingness to show love though not loved, Gomer was reinstated to a place of respect and honor as his wife. Hosea was faithful to the covenant of his marriage despite his wife’s unfaithfulness, and God upheld it in due time. So it just took one relying on the power and promise of God’s Word to bring about marriage restoration and a lost spouse’s reconciliation with God. Read Hosea 1-3
When a rebellious and ungrateful son asked his father for his inheritance, in effect saying that he wished his father was dead, and departed to places unknown to squander it away on ungodly living; there’s no doubt that his father was heartbroken and terribly disappointed. There must have been times when he wondered what he had done to make his son despise him so much. BUT GOD had another plan, and it just took one; one man devoted to prayer, being watchful and giving thanks in faith and obedience to God. Despite his very immoral and irresponsible lifestyle and the loss of his entire inheritance, when the prodigal son came to his senses and realized he would be better off at home, he was welcomed home with open arms and his return was celebrated with jubilation! The father put his trust in God and let his son depart, and God brought him home in due time. So it just took one relying on the power and promise of God’s Word to bring a time of great loss and intense mourning to a time of incredible joy and celebration! Red Luke 15:11-32
When God invited Satan to test Job and allowed him to kill and destroy his children and everything he owned, and then to cover his entire body with worms and painful sores; when his wife and friends mocked and ridiculed him, offering no comfort or encouragement at all, it’s difficult to imagine the depth of his devastation and despair. Job understandably wondered what he had done to deserve such loss, pain and humiliation, and he felt totally abandoned and forsaken by God, and wished that he had never been born or that the Lord would put an end to the futility and misery of his life. BUT GOD had another plan, and it just took one; one man to hear His voice in the midst of the storm and respond in faith and obedience to God. Even though Job’s wife lost faith and told him to curse God and die; despite how bad the circumstances were, he told her she was talking like a foolish woman, and because of Job’s walk and relationship with God and his prayers for his friends in the midst of his own trials, God blessed both of them with ten more children and twice everything else they had lost! So Job refused to curse God and continued to worship and praise Him no matter what, and God vindicated, blessed and rewarded him in due time. So it just took one relying on the power and promise of God’s Word to bring an end to unbearable suffering and work all that the devil intended for harm and destruction to good and for God’s glory! Read Job 1-42.
So no matter what we face as we stand on the power and promise of God’s Word for the full and complete restoration of our marriages and families, let’s NEVER forget that IT JUST TAKES ONE, and we’re sure to be blessed and encouraged!
Thank you so much for this site and your encouraging messages. Being the standing spouse feels SOOO lonely. Your prayers are your own, and in my marriage I can’t see how God can turn things around. But praise God, I don’t walk by sight (whew!). In the Word, it says His power is perfected in my weakness, and that’s enough to keep me standing! That and faithandmarriage.com!!!
Nik, thank you so much for sharing how the site is helping you as you stand for the restoration of your marriage. I often remind FAM members that we don’t have the grace and anointing needed to stand unles we’re doing it based on the Word of God; we have to know that we’ve heard from the Lord in order to access His power through the Holy Spirit. And when we stand for our own personal pleasure and what we hope to gain, we are in danger because God warns us that we shouldn’t expect to receive anything when we ask with wrong motives. Perhaps you will consider becoming a part of our family (that’s what we call the FAM Fellowship, because we really are like a family) for even more support and encouragement. But I appreciate that you let us know that you’re there and that you’re being blessed by the ministry. Just keep your focus on the Lord and the changes He wants to do in YOU and you will be totally amazed with the results. In fact, you’ll get to see some of that in my next SOF post, because I’ll be sharing some excerpts from recent testimonies on the private site to give God just some of the praise, honor and glory He deserves for the mighty work we have been blessed to witness in our midst. And, of course, NEVER forget that it DOES just take one; one man relying on the power and promise of God’s Word in faith and obedience for the full and complete restoration of your marriage!
Nik, I understand the “lonely” feeling, but know that God is there. Also know that you are not alone, and that there are alot of people experiencing the same thing as you, and that Jesus understands and wants to comfort you at this time. He is enough! God can do abundantly more than we can imagine, so have faith, grow in knowledge and in His love, and you will be amazed at the journey. There is nothing too hard for our God to fix, stand strong, brother, have faith, and praise the God who wants to give you more than you can imagine! God bless!
What a timely post and very much needed today. Just yesterday, another person told me that it takes two to restore a marriage. This morning, I am spending some time listening to God and decided to sign onto our Fam family website and here it is….the affirmation that I need. God continues to be faithful to His word and uses His people to comfort and affirm one another.
I so needed to read this. I believe that I have heard from God to stand for my marriage….I do want restoration personally also. God is so good I cant see how or when or even if our marriage can be restored but I believe that it will be and I just wait in anticipation to see his mighty work. To God be all the glory honor and praise
I thank the Lord for you Nik, everytime I hear of someone standing for their marriage, I know that I’m not alone. I know it does get lonely sometime, but the Lord is so faithful to show us not to rely on our feelings but on the truth. It is the truth that will set us free if we know it and believe it. My favorite scripture that the Lord gave to me early in my stand is 1 John 5:14-15. I know that praying for my marriage is the will of God and with confidence according to His Word I will receive the petitions that I request of Him. That is how the Lord turns things around, it is by the Word of God. It will never return void, but will accomplish what He pleases and prosper in the things were He sends it.
Be encouraged in the Word and in the Power of His might.
Victoriously,
Your Sister in Christ
It is encouraging to come across readings that are focussed upon the word on the restoration of marriages. Many marriages have and are continuing to collapse due to lack of understanding that reliance upon the Lord is the answer. I am looking forward to hearing and also sharing my personal experience through this wonderful site. There is nothing impossible with God. Therefore, our marriages can be restored by Him and Him alone.
Regards, Ann
I am also a stander and my wife left a little over one month ago. And a scripture that was given to me which I find great comfort in is Philippians 1:6 “Being Confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform (finish it) it until the day of Jesus Christ.”
GOD BLESS YOU, Linda, for FAMM; it’s truly a blessing for me to read the prayers. I know GOD will make a way for those who surrender to His will and His way. And it’s such a Inspiration to see your FAITH and TRUST in GOD. I ask for your prayers for me and my wife.
Thank you, Tim, for such encouraging words! You are so right; when we simply trust and obey God, nothing at all is impossible! So focus on your walk and relationship with Him because the only way to really trust Him is to really know Him, and that’s where so many fall short. But once we truly understand the depths of His love, His unmatched power, His everlasting faithfulness and all other traits of His character and nature, then it’s indeed easy to trust and obey Him and that’s the key to all we desire. And there’s no other way to know all of that outside of His Word, so dig into that and you won’t ever be disappointed. I do pray for you and your wife and that you will experience the joy God always intended for marriage as you each grow in your walk and relationship with the Lord and put Him at the center of your marriage and lives. I’d also encourage you to become part of our FAMM family, where you will be amazed and truly encouraged by so much genuine Christian love and support and learn HOW to stand for the full and complete restoration of your marriage. We all knew to stand when we came to FAMM; just not HOW to do it according to the Word of God, and the only way to get GOD’S results is to DO things GOD’S way! God wants you to be blessed in your marriage even more than you do, so be blessed and encouraged in the Lord as you seek to glorify Him in all you do!
My husband left me a few months ago and I’ve been devastated, so I really broke down at work a month ago and felt led to do a search on the internet for “faith and marriage.” That’s when I came across this website, and I’ve felt so much better after reading so many things posted here. And I pray the “Prayers for Marriage Restoration – Women” at least twice a day.
My husband tells me that it’s over, but I tell him that my God is more powerful. Yet I still have rough days and want to give up because my faith weakens, so I thank God for all of these testimonies and this website. It feels good to know that I’m not alone because I do feel lonely at times.
Please pray for me and my husband, and God bless you all.
Rachel, it’s always a blessing to hear that others are being blessed by our public website, so thanks for your words of encouragement and appreciation.
While we can all relate to the devastation of hearing that our spouses no longer want to be married to us, when we profess to believe that our God is bigger, our attitudes and actions need to line up with that. So please take the time to read and study Jeremiah 17:5-8 and all that it reveals. You have to put your hope in God and refuse to be moved by anything your husband says and does, or doesn’t say and do because THAT’S putting your hope and expectation in flesh and not God. BUT you also have to let your husband go as instructed in 1 Corinthians 7:15-16 and walk out the related and amplified instructions given to wives with husbands who are not being obedient to the Word in 1 Peter 3:1-6; which means that you can’t defy and invalidate what your husband says and plans by telling Him that your God is bigger–that isn’t consistent with letting him Go, Honey. And he must feel that you’ve let him go so he will be still long enough to hear God speaking to him. As long as you’re keeping that tug of war going, all of his focus will be on winning the battle and he won’t be able to get back to feeling and remembering the love that’s still there; which we know according to 1 Corinthians 13:8!
I’d also very strongly encourage you to consider joining the FAM fellowship where you will be blessed beyond anything you can imagine by the love, support and encouragement our members share with each other; we really are so much like a family. While we all know to stand by the time we get here, we don’t know HOW to do it GOD’S way; yet DOING things GOD’S way is the ONLY way to get GOD’S results as Jesus taught in Luke 6:46-49! So that’s what we focus on as we learn to stand in faith and obedience on the power and promise of God’s Word for the restoration of our marriages for His praise, honor and glory!
So dig into the Word, listen to praise and worship music that truly magnifies and glorifies Jesus Christ and keep a thankful attitude of gratitude as you truly trust and obey God and you will indeed be blessed beyond anything you could ever ask, think or imagine as seen in Ephesians 3:20-21! And never forget that Jesus said that WHEN it is impossible with man, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE WITH GOD (Matthew 19:26)!!! So be blessed and encouraged in the Lord and make sure to use this time of waiting wisely by geting ready (letting God do a radical work of healing and restoration in YOU) because God is always moving!
Linda, thanks so much for your encouraging words! I too have been standing for the restoration of my marriage for about a year, but I really didn’t know how the stand. After all this time, exactly three hundred, sixty-five days today, I now know that I truly have to allow God to be in total control and do what only He CAN do!
The advice you gave to Rachel about letting her husband go is something I struggled with for a long time because to me, letting go meant giving up on my marriage and that was something that I did not want to do. But now I am realizing more and more that it really means getting out of God’s way and also allowing Him to work on me and my personal challenges. It sometimes seems that the more I pray, the worse my husband behaves, so I constantly remind myself that God’s Word tells me to walk by faith and not by sight and to keep my eyes on Him.
I still believe God for the total restoration and healing of my marriage, and my trust is in Him because He promises to never leave me nor forsake me. Please pray for me and my marriage. Thanks and may God continue to bless you and this ministry!
I loved reading this post this morning, and have to say that this website has been the ultimate blessing in restoring not only my marriage but my life.
I also fought with my husband, and was hacking into his email and trying to reach out to the non-covenant person he’s involved with, which didn’t make me feel any better. In fact, the more I tried to reach out to him, the more he ignored me. And when I finally let go and stopped focusing on my relationship with my husband, God showed me how my prayers for marriage restoration consumed me, and I had to honestly ask myself if that was the only reason I came back to the Lord. That’s when He showed me that I had abandoned my relationship with Him and I recognized His great love for me.
So I realized exactly what Linda said–that I have to allow God to change ME, and that He is using this time to prepare ME for my husband’s homecoming. Without true repentance, a personal relationship with Jesus and understanding and knowledge of God’s Word, We’re just doomed to the same things that separated us in the first place. So the change is within, and real peace comes only when we know God and through understanding His plan and will for our lives. When we truly know God and come to the revelation that His Word does not return to Him void, and stop focusing on our spouses and start focusing on our relationship with the Lord, even we are in awe of the resulting peace! And when we live and walk in that kind of peace, our spouses really do notice!
My husband just recently started talking to me again, and even Though we’re not yet fully restored, I know that’s because God is still working in my heart and life. He is using this time to deepen my relationship with Christ and teaching me to die to my flesh daily and take my thoughts and emotions captive and make them obedient to the Word. Regrettably, my emotions led me to lash out at my husband and to make bitter decisions, which hurt all of us and ultimately led to our separation. As Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?”
So I’m learning to TRUST God and KNOW that HE is in control and no longer desire to make worldly or emotional decisions; my desire is to be aligned with God’s Word and then be assured of His promises. I’m happier than I’ve been in years…and we’re still separated! But I wake up every day and Thank God because even though this has been the most difficult time in my life, I’m thankful for it. Without going through all of this, I wouldn’t appreciate my husband for the man he truly is and most certainly would have continued searching for happiness in the world. For the first time in my life, things are not going as “I planned,” and despite that, I am very happy and filled with love and grateful that things didn’t go as I planned!
So while this website and ministry are dedicated to marriage restoration, I found so much more than that because my relationship with Christ has been restored, and my heart and life have changed!
Thank you! I needed this because I’m standing for the restoration of my marriage! I love my wife and kids and just miss them so much . Thanks for the encouragement!
This describes me because I am the one standing for marriage restoration. I had lost hope until I found this ministry and website, which has encouraged me. There’s nothing from my husband that tells me to fight for my marriage, so I’m just utilizing faith and God is showing me Himself through this.
I am so grateful for your obedience to God’s call to start this ministry. I’m across the globe and yet you have helped me stand for my marriage even though everyone around me tells me that it takes two. I understood that a covenant cannot be broken and that when King Saul broke the covenant made by Jacob there were serious consequences when King David was in power, such as famine.
So I began to search for answers beyond men’s wisdom and came across FAMM and have been following since April this year. And to God be the glory, the healing process of my marriage has begun!
God has given us so many promises of restoration and one of my favourites is Hosea 2:6-7. Knowing that it just takes one has really helped me keep hope alive. So once again, thank you very much and may God continue to strengthen you as you take care of His sheep in such a unique way.