Love Never Fails! by Dan Spitz
(Note from Linda: Dan posted the following on the private website last night and it had quite an impact on many of the FAM fellowship members, so I greatly appreciate his permission to share it here. It seems that the timing was incredibly appropriate for many in our family, which is particularly interesting since Dan had considered reading the book months ago when the movie, FIREPROOF, first came out. But he never got around to it until his pastor gave the book to him a few days ago. As I read this, I was reminded that Proverbs 19:22 tells us that “What a man desires is unfailing love….” So the challenge for every man and woman standing for marriage restoration is to GIVE UNFAILING LOVE NO MATTER WHAT because as Proverbs 20:6 confirms…Many a man claims to have unfailing love, but a faithful man who can find? So as Dan’s powerful post reminds us, let us never forget that LOVE NEVER FAILS, and we will indeed be blessed and encouraged!)
I have been reading The Love Dare, which is the book from the movie FIREPROOF. It is an awesome book and just as powerful as the movie. So I encourage everyone to read it. It is scripturally based and extremely practical in terms of following God’s Word in marriage…He hates divorce, marriage is a covenant that cannot be broken, marriage was created by God as a one flesh union, and no man can destroy it.
It is a 40-day challenge for husbands and wives to understand and practice unconditional love. And I want to share the information provided from day 39 of the dare, which is based on Love bears all things, believes all things, endures all things, Love never fails, (1 Corinthians 13:7-8.)
The book states that many times when a marriage is in crisis, the spouse who is trying to make things work goes to the other, declaring in no uncertain terms that no matter what has happened in the past, he or she is committed to the marriage; they promise that their love can be counted on to last. But not wanting to hear that yet, the other spouse holds to their position of wanting out of the marriage; they just don’t see the marriage lasting long term; nor do they even want it to anymore.
The book goes on to say that the spouse who just laid his or her heart on the line can’t handle the rejection, so they withdraw their statement and say, “Fine, if that is the way you want it, that is the way it will be.”
But the authors point out that if love is really love, it doesn’t waffle when it’s not received the way we want it to be. If love can be told to quit loving, then it’s not really love. Love that is from God is unending and unstoppable. If the object of its affection doesn’t choose to receive it, love keeps giving anyway. Again, love never fails…NEVER!
They continue to say that when we have done everything within our power to obey God, our spouses may still forsake us and walk away; just as Jesus’ followers did to Him at times. But if our marriages fail…if our spouse walks away, let it not be because we gave up or stopped loving them. Love never fails!
They make the point that the unchanging Holy Spirit who dwells in the hearts of all believers is the source of love. And the love He creates in us is unchanging as well; it is the will of God…the calling of God and according to the Word of God; which are all UNCHANGING. The Bible even declares them “irrevocable” in Romans 11:29. As Luke 21:33 declares Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will never pass away.
And when a marriage is built on the Word of God, when all else fails, the truth of God will still be standing. They suggest that along the way, we must dare to be patient, to be unselfish, and to sacrifice for our mate’s needs. No challenge or circumstance can occur that will ever put an expiration date on God or His love. Therefore, our love, made of the same substance, bears the same, unchanging characteristics. Love never fails!
I want to quote the next paragraph directly, so as not to lose any of its effect. “So today your dare is to put your unfailing love into the most powerful, personal words you can. This is your chance to declare (clarified below) that no matter what imperfections exist- both in you and in your spouse- your love is greater still. No matter what they’ve done or how often they’ve done it, you choose to love them anyway. Though you’ve been far from steady in your treatment of them over the years, your days of being inconsistent in love are over. You accept this one man or woman as God’s special gift to you, and you promise to love them until death. You’re saying to your spouse, “Even if you don’t like what you’re reading (The Love Dare) – even if you don’t like me- I choose to love you anyway. Forever. Because love never fails.”
I need to clarify that, in the movie, this book is in the form of a journal, so the “declaring” is for oneself and NOT spoken and declared to our spouses. By writing it, the thoughts and realizations that God puts in our hearts about our spouses is processed in our own minds and thus directs our behavior and interactions with our spouses.
May our unconditional love for our spouses and our trust and faith in God and His Word encourage us to stand in obedience for our marriages and let the love of God prevail…because love never fails!