Why We Have to Believe God as we Stand for Marriage Restoration
One of the most heartbreaking experiences when ministering to men and women standing for the restoration of their marriages is seeing how often they really struggle to honestly and truly BELIEVE God and to take Him at His Word without doubt or question. When all else is said and done, everything comes down to whether or not we really BELIEVE God. Without that, what do we have, and what are we standing on? And if we believe ANYTHING God tells us, we have to believe EVERYTHING He tells us. Because He is either who He says He is and He can do what He says He can and WILL do, or He’s a liar. So we can NOT pick and choose what about God and His Word we want to accept and believe. We either have to take ALL of Him or NONE of Him. So I just want to share a little of what the Bible teaches us about who God is and what His Word reminds us HE WILL do for us, particularly as we stand for the restoration of our marriages, because we have to BELIEVE God to BELIEVE IN God. And without believing in God, we can’t have faith, and God said that without faith it is IMPOSSIBLE to please Him and that when we shrink back from living by faith, He is actually displeased with us. So today’s post contains just a few passages of scripture I hope help us understand how important it is to figure out what keeps us from really believing God; and why we some times find it a lot easier to believe the world and what we hear and see instead of the awesome and unmatched power and faithfulness of God, our Creator, who loves us with an everlasting and enduring love, and who wants nothing but HIS best for us! So as we read and meditate on the following passages of scripture, I hope and pray we will be blessed and encouraged and that our hearts and spirits will be touched by the power of the Holy Spirit as we are enlightened and transformed by a greater understanding of just who God is and that He is the ONLY one we CAN believe and just how important it is to believe Him and take Him at His Word!!!
There’s little doubt that Job is the one person in the Bible that might have had reasonable and justifiable cause to doubt God. But NO MATTER WHAT, he refused to give up on his belief that God would deliver him in the face of so much evidence to the contrary. So reading and studying the book of Job is a MUST for all of us as we stand against the rest of the world and the forces of hell for the restoration of our marriages. No matter how bad things get and no matter how hopeless they look, and no matter how discouraged we get, it’s not likely that any of us have experienced the heart break and loss suffered by Job. And I have NO DOUBT that if Job had not continued to hold onto his faith in God, no matter how bad things looked and no matter how discouraged he got, his outcome would have been very different and he would not provide the assurance we have to day that God WILL RESTORE what has been taken from us…IF WE BELIEVE HE WILL. But when reading Job, it’s VERY important NOT to miss the significance of Job 3:25, which says What I feared has come upon me; what I dreaded has happened to me. Job’s fear and dread obviously reveals that he was not in fact the great man of faith he is often considered, which I believe explains why God allowed the devil to have his way in Job’s life, and that makes it abundantly clear why developing strong faith in God is a MUST as we stand for the restoration of our marriages. And what a powerful example and confirmation Job’s story gives us of Proverbs 18:20-21, which says From the fruit of his mouth a man’s stomach is filled; with the harvest from his lips he is satisfied. The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Initially Job expected and spoke disaster into his life, but in the end he expected and spoke deliverance and restoration into his life, so we all need to pay a LOT more attention to the things we are speaking into existence, because whether we understand and believe it or not, we are doing exactly that!
Hebrews 10:38 tells us But my righteous one will live by faith. And if he shrinks back, I will not be pleased with him.” And then Hebrews 11:6 says And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. And we can NOT say we believe in God and have faith that He will restore our marriages when our words and actions say otherwise, because that’s just not possible based on the following verses:
Matthew 15:18
But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man ‘unclean.’
Luke 6:45
The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.
Romans 10:8-10
But what does it say? “The word is near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart,” that is, the word of faith we are proclaiming: That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.
God’s omnipotent power and the relationship between Jesus and the Word is established in John 1:1-4, which says In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men.
God’s perfect plan and purpose, and His reasons for choosing us are clearly spelled out in Ephesians 1:3-12, which says Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will—to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding. And he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times will have reached their fulfillment—to bring all things in heaven and on earth together under one head, even Christ. In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. And that’s further confirmed in 1 Peter 2:9, which says But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.
Malachi 2:1-17 (NASB) leaves NO doubt that God hates divorce and the lengths HE will go to defend the covenant of our marriages and the consequences for those who dishonor their marriage vows; “And now this commandment is for you, O priests. “If you do not listen, and if you do not take it to heart to give honor to My name,” says the LORD of hosts, “then I will send the curse upon you and I will curse your blessings; and indeed, I have cursed them already, because you are not taking it to heart.
“Behold, I am going to rebuke your offspring, and I will spread refuse on your faces, the refuse of your feasts; and you will be taken away with it. “Then you will know that I have sent this commandment to you, that My covenant may continue with Levi,” says the LORD of hosts. “My covenant with him was one of life and peace, and I gave them to him as an object of reverence; so he revered Me and stood in awe of My name. “True instruction was in his mouth and unrighteousness was not found on his lips; he walked with Me in peace and uprightness, and he turned many back from iniquity. “For the lips of a priest should preserve knowledge, and men should seek instruction from his mouth; for he is the messenger of the LORD of hosts.
“But as for you, you have turned aside from the way; you have caused many to stumble by the instruction; you have corrupted the covenant of Levi,” says the LORD of hosts. “So I also have made you despised and abased before all the people, just as you are not keeping My ways but are showing partiality in the instruction.
“Do we not all have one father? Has not one God created us? Why do we deal treacherously each against his brother so as to profane the covenant of our fathers?
“Judah has dealt treacherously, and an abomination has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem; for Judah has profaned the sanctuary of the LORD which He loves and has married the daughter of a foreign god. “As for the man who does this, may the LORD cut off from the tents of Jacob everyone who awakes and answers, or who presents an offering to the LORD of hosts. “This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the LORD with tears, with weeping and with groaning, because He no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. “Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’ Because the LORD has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. “But not one has done so who has a remnant of the Spirit And what did that one do while he was seeking a godly offspring? Take heed then to your spirit, and let no one deal treacherously against the wife of your youth. “For I hate divorce,” says the LORD, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with wrong,” says the LORD of hosts. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.” You have wearied the LORD with your words Yet you say, “How have we wearied Him?” In that you say, “Everyone who does evil is good in the sight of the LORD, and He delights in them,” or, “Where is the God of justice?” And for those who mistakenly believe this is “just Old Testament law” and no longer applicable because Jesus came to abolish and fulfill the law and specifically permitted divorce, 1 Peter 3:7 indicates otherwise, because it says Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers. But the best evidence that such opinions are incorrect comes from Jesus Himself, who very specifically said the exact opposite in Matthew 5:17-18, which says “Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished. And contrary to the opinions otherwise, according to the Bible that has NOT happened yet, because Revelation 21:1 says Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.
And Isaiah 55 is a wonderful illustration of restoration and how God takes everything Satan intended for evil and turns it into something awesome for the glory and everlasting renown of Jesus Christ! And it promises us that God WILL do what His Word says He will do, because Isaiah 55:10-11 says As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. And Isaiah 46:11 leaves little doubt that God WILL do whatever it takes to accomplish His will, because it saysFrom the east I summon a bird of prey; from a far-off land, a man to fulfill my purpose. What I have said, that will I bring about; what I have planned, that will I do. That’s why we have to put our faith and confidence in the Word of God and HIS will and ability to bring it to pass! And Numbers 23:19 makes it VERY clear and confirms that God is NOT a liar and that He WILL do what He says He will do and that He does NOT change His mind, because it says God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill? So when we doubt God will do exactly what His Word says He will do, we are in effect calling Him a liar! And, I for one, am not willing to call ALMIGHTY God a liar!
There’s certainly a whole lot more that could be written on this topic, but hopefully this is sufficient to help all of us understand that it is VITALLY important for us to really BELIEVE God as we stand for the restoration of our marriages, and that He WILL do exactly what His Word promises. And when we struggle with doubt or confusion we need to rely on the power of our words and the effect they have in our hearts, because Psalm 45:1 says My heart is stirred by a noble theme as I recite my verses for the king; my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer. So instead of giving voice to our doubts and fears, let’s focus on speaking the things we want into being; let’s speak life into our seemingly dead marriages by speaking of love and restoration and by speaking righteousness and holiness into our spouses’ lives. Let’s speak of the transforming and renewing power of God as we continually keep praises on our lips and thanksgiving in our hearts! And then there’s NO doubt we will begin to see the awesome power of God at work in our lives and marriages and be truly blessed and encouraged!
Linda — Thank you so much for this SOF! This is such a powerful message and one which I have been struggling with this past week. From my “natural” viewpoint, I have seen so little happening with my husband and our marriage restoration for the past several months. I’ve been seeking God’s face and asking for Him to reveal to me any hindrances to my prayers or disobedience that is displeasing to Him. God has really put it on my heart this week that I must BELIEVE and, while taking a break from work a couple of days ago and praying, God gave me the following verse: “Blessed is she who has BELIEVED that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished!” (Luke 1:45). And God’s emphasis in my head was definitely on the word “believed!” And then, in God’s perfect way, some of Charles Stanley’s audio teachings this week have just happened to be about “When Our Faith Wavers” — they have been so timely and helpful, that I just KNOW God put these in my path for my benefit and the benefit of those who, like me, are struggling. And you and Diane are so right when you say that we not only must believe in God, we must believe God and take Him at his Word — no matter what! We simply need to KNOW, TRUST, and BELIEVE that when we seek our heavenly Father and ask for anything in accordance with His will, He will move heaven and earth to get it to us — it’s as simple as that! Thank you!
Thank you for sharing that, Kathy. I’ll have to check out the messages from Dr. Stanley, because I always appreciate his point of view. And I’m glad this was timely for you. Maybe you can join us in FAM Chat a little later – you’re bound to have some good advice to share based on the messages you’ve been hearing. And I really appreciate the scripture reference…it’s powerful!
Dear Lord, thank you for meeting Kathy at her place of need in her time of need. And thank you for giving her the measure of faith she needs to stand in faith and obedience to the call you’ve placed on her life as she stands for the restoration of her marriage. And we thank you that even when we can’t see it, you ARE working, and that at the appointed time, the work you’re doing on our behalf WILL be manifested. And, Lord, since you made us the weak and flawed vessels you did, and since you love us so much, I ask for a special incident of encouragement for Kathy. You know we need it from time to time, Lord, and you do tell us that we have not, because we ask not. So I’m asking for that for Kathy tonight and give you thanks for it in advance! We love you and praise you! We thank you for your Word that tells us that you will stand behind the covenant of our marriages and that YOU will bring about the circumstances that lead to our marriages and families being completely healed and restored, because you hate divorce. And we ask all this and give thanks in the name of our Lord and Savior, jesus Christ. Amen.
Satan wants to prove that we worship God not out of love, but because what God has done and/or will do for us. He wants to convince us to be fairweathered “believers” – following God only when things are going well or for what we can get. That is why it is so important to believe God – exactly according to the verses Linda shared. If we do not believe EVERYTHING God says are roots will not be deep enough to stay in the ground when circumstances and situations start pulling them up. We must know that without our believing God our scars and bruises from our pain and struggles would be worthless – they are intended to make us stronger not weaker in our belief. I have had a great week because, not even including my stand for my marriage, I know I believe in what God says and what He promises He will do – in every aspect of my life. If one cannot find peace in that – it ain’t gonna happen for them!!
Kathy, I share your struggles when you say you have been praying and not seeing anything happening in your restoration. Human nature makes us start doubting that God can do what he says he can do. This is where we must dig deeper into our faith. God understands that we will struggle but he also likes it when we call upon him in times like these. Remember that just because it hasn’t happened yet, doesn’t mean God has changed His mind. While you are waiting, God is working. The timing may not be right for Him to get the ultimate glory, and you the maximum benefit. That’s why the Bible says, “Let patience have her perfect work that ye may be perfect….wanting nothing.”
Dear Heavenly Father, we just ask you for your perfect peace for Kathy while she waits on your promised restoration. Give her increased faith to believe that you will do what you said you will do. Give her increased perseverance to continue standing in the gap for her husband and her marriage. Lord, you know her heart and you know how much she loves you. Lord, she delights in you and as you said in your Word, you will give her the desires of her heart, which is the complete restoration of her marriage. Lord we thank you and praise you in advance for this wonderful blessing that you will bestow upon her and her family in due time, in Jesus’ mighty and precious name. amen.