(Note from Linda: This is a very powerful and important message for everyone standing for marriage restoration, which was recently posted on the private website, so I greatly appreciate Mark’s permission to share his testimony here because I know that if we REALLY get this, we will indeed be blessed and encouraged beyond belief!)

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Dear Brothers and Sisters in Christ. I thank God for each and every one of you and for this wonderful ministry and your participation. Sadly, I have not been very active in it for the past month or so, and as a result, I have fallen short. So please excuse this long post.

As I have shared with you all, God has been moving mightily in our marriage restoration, and my wife has been coming around quite a bit, and has been very open and caring toward me. At the same time, I found out that the NCP had moved into her apartment, and I became very discouraged by that and confused, and even though I tried to tell myself that it didn’t matter, God later revealed to me that I was harboring hurt, anger and unforgiveness and has shown me the danger in not trusting and walking in Him.

I have been leaning on my own understanding and took my eyes off of God and all the wonderful works and blessings He has given me. I want to share what has happened…and that despite my actions and lack of faith. I believe that God has used this to open my eyes and heart and to show me just how important it is to remain in faith with Him, and how important it is to stay in His word and to stay involved in this ministry. God brought us all here for a reason; it was not by accident that He spoke to our hearts and guided us here, or gave us the strength to stand for our marriages.

My wife invited me to share Thanksgiving with her and her family and I was asked to say the prayer for the meal. At the very end, I got a bit emotional and she came over to me, gave me a hug, and said I love you. She also asked me to come to her immediate family Christmas event as well as her extended family Christmas Eve event. And the day after Thanksgiving, she came over to the house and helped put up the Christmas tree and decorate the house. It was a wonderful day, and she told me how great it was that “we could be friends” through this whole process.

I was very thankful for her being there and for inviting me to spend the holidays with her, but I was not keeping my eyes on Jesus…and not seeing that in spite of the situation, she was inviting me, and NOT the NCP to share the Family events.

Unfortunately, over the past couple of weeks, I found myself leaning on my pride and own understanding, and not spending time in the word, and not spending time in the ministry. Instead, I was putting all of my attention and focus on her and the situation. I was overcome with the fact that I had not truly let go of her and that I was still trying to hang on. But in reality, that was my hurt pride about the situation. As a result, I responded foolishly and told her that I did not think it would be a good idea for me to attend her family events as it just made it too hard on everyone. I also said some other prideful things about how I didn’t want to be just friends. Her reaction was understandably one of shock and hurt, which caused a series of unfortunate events and led her to contact her attorney for the first time in six months. What was I thinking? Well, we all know; don’t we?

I have spent the last week in tears over this and what I feared was irreparable damage. However, the reason of this post was not to dwell on my fall or my lack of faith; I am writing this post to share with you all what a glorious and amazing God we serve, who loves and forgives us. You see, God has used this to truly open my eyes, and He is showing me that I have not been walking in faith; that my eyes were not on Him, and all of the great things He has been doing. He has shown me that I was harboring hurt, anger and unforgiveness; that I was focused on what I perceived as a set back, and most importantly, that I was still trying to control the situation. So I have gone to God and asked for forgiveness for my pride and for not giving this over to Him.

So I want to share what I now understand “Letting Go” means. It does not mean to push the person away; it means to let go of the situation, the sin and how we want to react to our spouses and what they are or are not doing. It means to walk in faith and to not fear what we see happening around us. It means to trust in God with all of our hearts and minds. Isaiah 26:3-4 says; “You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you, Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord is the rock eternal.” And Jeremiah 17:7-8 says “Blessed is the man who trust in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.” Also John 14:1 says “Do not let your hearts be troubled, Trust in God.” And, of course, Hebrews 11:1 tells us that “Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”

It is amazing how God can make all things work together for His glory. Out of our failures, he can bring victories. But that only happens if we keep our faith in Him and stay the course. I praise God as I read in John 15:4, which says “Remain in Me and I will remain in you, No branch can bear fruit by itself; It must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.” And prior to that, John 15:2 says “ He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.” You see, God was merely doing some pruning of His Vine. He needed to prune off that part of me that was growing in the wrong direction. “God saved us, not because of the righteous things we do, but because of his mercy” (Titus 3:5)

Friends, I am putting all my faith in God that He will overcome my shortcomings; He is faithful and He will use this somehow to His glory. I don’t know what to do other than to turn it over to Him and He will fix everything in His time and in His way, and not mine! I know that He will make my crooked places straight!

Therefore, I want to encourage everyone as we are in this Christmas Season that our focus should not be on ourselves, our short comings, our circumstances or our spouses; it should be 100% on Jesus!! Hebrews 10:22-25 says it best…“Let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another.”

“May the God of hope fill you all with joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” (Romans 15:13)

When we ignore the instruction given in Proverbs 3:5-6, and jump to a lot of wrong conclusions and then unwisely ACT on them, we do so at our own peril and often cause tremendous harm to the restoration of our marriages and families, which is particularly disheartening when so much progress has already been made. And since some of the FAM Fellowship members have made that mistake in the past week, I hope others can avoid doing the same thing by reading a previous Seeds Of Faith post by Dan, which is a powerful reminder that things are NOT always what they appear to be!

Beyond the harm caused when we lean to our own understanding and then REACT impulsively and totally contrary to the instructions God gives us, we are NOT trusting Him with ALL of our hearts, acknowledging Him in ALL of our ways, and certainly NOT taking our thoughts captive and MAKING them obedient to Jesus Christ and the Word. Therefore, we have no reason or right to expect the Lord to make our paths straight because that would be making a mockery of His Word, and God will NEVER allow that because He declared that His Word will NEVER return without doing what He desires and sent it to accomplish (Isaiah 55:10-11); and that’s NOT just a reference to the positive things promised in His Word, but the promised consequences when we fail to live by faith and to Do as instructed as well.

In fact, the harm and destruction caused when acting impulsively and unwisely when leaning to our own understanding is a powerful illustration of Jesus’ warning in Luke 6:46-49, where He made it VERY clear that if we hear His Words and DO NOT DO what He said, our houses will come down with a great crash and be utterly destroyed! And since leaning to our own understanding also means that we are NOT doing as instructed in order to win the spiritual warfare now being waged against us and our marriages by taking arguments and pretensions setting themselves up against the knowledge of God captive and making them obedient to Christ and the Word, we also have no reason to believe that we can or will win that battle either (2 Corinthians 10:3-6).

But when we RESIST the devil (James 4:7) and stand in faith and obedience on the power and promise of God’s Word, He will make our paths straight and no matter what comes against our marriages and families, we will withstand the storms and win the battle for the full and complete restoration of our marriages and families! For truly, as the Lord says, the battle belongs to Him (2 Chronicles 20:15) and NO wisdom, NO insight and NO plan can succeed against Him (Proverbs 21:30)! But when we rely on our own wisdom and insight and then take matters into our own hands, we walk and act in pride and as warned; God OPPOSES the proud (1 Peter 5:5-6) and pride goes before destruction (Proverbs 16:18.

And even IF the understanding we are leaning to is totally correct, we can and have to avoid destructive behavior and attitudes by DOING as Jesus taught in Matthew 5 and as powerfully illustrated and further explained in 1 Peter 2:18-25. And the only way to DO that is to DO as Jesus did by entrusting ourselves to him who judges justly. That means submitting ourselves to God as we humble ourselves under His mighty hand, and then the devil will flee and God will lift us up in DUE time! And it’s impossible to miss the vital importance of Peter’s instructions in the above passage when it is the very passage referred to in the instructions given to both husbands and wives in 1 Peter 3, which affirms and further expounds upon it as well.

After writing this last night, I couldn’t help appreciating the Lord’s perfect timing and confirmation once again when I read the following message from Glenn Jackson. It’s short and to the point, but IF we would learn to PRACTICE it, we would indeed be the most blessed and encouraged of God’s people, and we would indeed see the glory of the Lord displayed as He moves heaven and earth to restore our marriages and families!

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EXHORTATIONS FROM THE FATHER [Reflections Of The Father’s Heart]
December 11th 2008
+ To lose sight of Me is to lose all “assurance”. To be in a position wherein one cannot hear My voice means certain “deception” in this most critical hour.
+ There is no “problem” for My children that “perfect obedience” [absolute faith-perfect love] cannot eliminate. Therefore the only “problem” My children have is disobedience.
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You can visit Glenn’swebsite to read all of his messages online or to sign up to receive them by email; he tells it like it is! Praise the Lord!

(Note from Linda: It is amazing to see how similar themes tend to exist in the lives and circumstances of the FAM Fellowship members as God faithfully confirms a similar message in one post after another! And there’s little doubt that this week’s message is forgiving and forgetting! Without knowing what Melissa had written yesterday, one of the other FAM members with a Restored Marriage submitted the following post on the private website at almost the same time! And it too is a very important message for everyone standing for marriage restoration, so I appreciate her permission to share her insight here, because everyone who truly understands that forgiving DOES mean forgetting will be greatly blessed and encouraged as the Lord moves to restore their marriages and families the same way He did hers!)

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Forgive and forget…those words go hand in hand; right? We hear these words used by pastors, and we see it written in many books; most of which are about forgiveness. As children, a lot of us were taught to forgive AND forget. And we rarely ever see or hear one of those words without the other. Yet, one of the biggest lessons I have had to learn is that we cannot truly forgive without also truly forgetting. Likewise, we cannot forget without forgiving.

God powerfully illustrates biblical forgiveness in Jeremiah 31:34, where He declared …”For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more.” So if we are to forgive as we are forgiven, which Jesus taught in Luke 6:37 and other verses, according to this verse, we are called to “forgive their wickedness” AND required to choose to “remember their sins no more.” But that last part is where most Christians miss the mark. I know I certainly did.

As Christians, we seem to believe that there’s a natural inclination to forgive since the bible is full of verses about forgiveness. Yet, with that being said, we struggle with true biblical forgiveness. Why? Because we don’t want to forget; we are afraid to forget, so we don’t. Not only that, I have heard pastors and esteemed Christian authors state that we should not forget; yet that is the exact opposite of what God commands us to do.

My personal struggle was the forgetting part, and oh how I struggled. Something would happen that I’d need to forgive My husband for; and I knew as a Christian I was called to forgive, so I did. However, I knew deep down in my heart that I would never forget; that was my safety net; my line of defense to protect myself. So when an offense would occur, big or small, I would forgive my husband, but not too long after I forgave, I would bring up the offense again and again; just so I could understand it…just so I could get “closure.” We would have an argument over something that was already forgiven, and in that argument, I would bring up and talk in great detail about the offense again. And not only that; while I was at it, I would bring up offense numbers 7, 13, and 362, as well as the date, time and year they occurred…just for good measure. I had not forgotten, so I had not really truly forgiven either. And as history proved, that took quite a toll on our marriage.

On the other hand, My husband tended to choose to forget; to sweep my offenses under the rug. He chose to forget so there was not even anything there to forgive. He is truly a very good natured man. He would just bury them so they would go away. But as the offenses started to pile up, there was no more room under that rug. Eventually, he had buried so many of them that he could not bury any more, so unforgiveness settled in. And that took quite a toll on our marriage as well.

When I decided to let My husband go months ago, I had to forget the things I had forgiven, and I told him that I was learning the meaning of true biblical forgiveness, and that I was choosing to remember no more. He thanked me that day, but I am certain that he did not believe me.

Forgetting past offenses was the most liberating thing I ever did; I finally had true peace. The load was off my shoulders and the burden was removed from my heart. It must have showed in my attitude, my behavior, and my overall demeanor because My husband noticed the change. And not too long after that, I believe My husband truly forgave the offenses he had forgotten, and the rest is beautiful history.

Forgive what needs to be forgiven and forget what needs to be forgotten. We can NOT do one without the other. Both are necessary in order to really “let go” and both are necessary for marriage restoration. Both are necessary for our sanity, and both are necessary because that’s what God commands us to do!

Thank you, God, for giving me the need to forgive, the strength to forget, and the wisdom to know the difference; because the wisdom YOU gave me and the ability YOU gave me to forgive and forget made ALL the difference in the world, and most importantly, in the full and complete restoration of my marriage!

Love and Blessings!

One of the most important lessons to learn while standing for marriage restoration is how to forget the former things; because we have to let go of our past to make way for what God has planned for our future. Even though our marriage might seem totally broken and hopeless now, it will be put back together by God himself and ALL THINGS will be restored for His glory. So God isn’t just going to hand us back the same marriage that left us standing where we are today; He is going to make it brand new!

As Isaiah 43:18-25 says Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.

And since we are instructed NOT to dwell on the past, we can not pick apart events that happened in the past and sulk over them. As a matter of fact, in the above passage of scripture, we are asked “do you not perceive it?” And the definition of perceive can be defined as having an awareness or knowledge or to become aware of through the senses, as defined in the Merriam Webster Dictionary. So we should have a sense within us that tells us of the new thing the Lord is doing; in other words, we should be able to feel it. But if we are dwelling in the past, we will miss it altogether.

So we have to let go of all of the hurt, pain, resentment, bitterness and wipe away the memories of those things that caused us so much grief. Before the marriage we’re standing for completely came apart at the seams, we most likely struggled through many trials just to keep it together. And it’s those struggles that we need to erase away from our memories.

Most of us standing for the restoration of our marriages, have spouses involved with an NCP (non-covenant person), and there is always tremendous pain involved in learning about the involvement of another person. However, we have to put the attention back on God’s purpose and understand that nothing comes as a surprise to Him, and that as a believer and follower of Jesus Christ, there is nothing that happens to us that God can’t and won’t use for our good. And we know that because Romans 8:28 says And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

So we have to know and trust that there Is a purpose in all things that come our way, and that God has GOOD plans for us, as he declares in Jeremiah 29:11-13, which says For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

And we can’t forget that God knows the end from the beginning and sees the BIG picture and WILL bring it ALL to pass (Isaiah 46:10-11). Yes, we have been through painful experiences and difficult times and might well go through even more before our marriages and families are fully restored. However, we can’t drag yesterdays pain into today or today’s pain into our tomorrow (Philippians 3:13), or we will end up carrying so much emotional baggage that we will be overcome by it and prevent the new thing God wants to do for us (Matthew 9:17 and Mark 2:21. So we have to cast our burdens on the Lord and trust Him with the outcome (Psalm 55:22). And once we give it to God, we must be careful not to pick it back up again, or we will find ourselves right back in the same mindsets and patterns of behavior that have already failed us. It is God and GOD ALONE, Who can make ALL THINGS new and breathe life back into our dead marriages (Ezekiel 37)!

So when we struggle with memories and thoughts that sow seeds of doubt and discouragement into our minds, we absolutely have to take them captive and MAKE them obedient to The Word (2 Corinthians 10:3-6). Whether it’s the memories of broken promises, finding out about an NCP, or dealing with the hearts of stone our spouses have toward us now, we have to trust that God is a God of restoration and that HE can heal all things and make them new. And we have to understand that our spouses are not the only reason our marriages failed. We ourselves have played a large part in the breakdown of our marriages, and when we focus on letting God do the work needed in US, we release His supernatural power to work within our spouses too. This is something FAM members have experienced over and over again; once our spouses take notice of the changes in us, their hearts of stone becomes softened and they start turning back home. And letting go of the past and walking in true forgiveness toward our spouses is evidence of our own hearts being softened. And if God can soften our hearts, we know He can soften our spouses’ hearts as well! Praise His Holy name!

(Note from Linda: Diane shared this on the private site this morning after reading another member’s post, in which she shared how she discovered that a conclusion she had wrongly reached and allowed to send her into a very negative attitude wasn’t at all true and almost caused her to do something she really would have regretted. This is a very important lesson for everyone standing for marriage restoration, so I appreciate Diane’s permission to share her post here as well. Diane has a Restored Marriage and the Lord has certainly continued to bless her and her family, so we always appreciate her After Marriage Restoration insight and encouragement. And we will definitely be blessed and encouraged if we remember that we actually have to TAKE our thoughts captive and MAKE them obedient to Christ by replacing them with His Word to win the spiritual warfare now being waged against us, our marriages and our families!)

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After reading MNO’s (member name omitted) post, I kept thinking about taking our thoughts captive, and I felt a post coming and finally have the topic. God wants us to take our thoughts captive, but we also have to fill that space with God’s word (2 Corinthians 10:3-6). If we just take the thought captive without replacing it with something else, another one just comes to fill that empty spot and bring us down again. So we have to put one of God’s promises in that thought’s place and keep repeating it and getting it down in our hearts. I have written about this same thing before, but some things are worth repeating.

I’m learning that this is even more important WHEN OUR SPOUSE COMES HOME. They have seen and were drawn to our peace and comfort, so we need to be able to take our thoughts captive and always keep that peace because life goes on and things do come up.

And we need to make preparations for the good things God has in store for us. He has put dreams and desires in our hearts (Psalm 37:4), so we are standing on God’s promises and waiting and believing that they will come to pass. But there IS waiting involved; anything good is worth waiting for and no one really wants a half baked cake or marriage restoration.

Much of our life is spent waiting, and it is how we wait that matters. It is in the waiting that we learn. The Bible tells us to be patient as we wait (James 5:7). But we are to wait with expectancy; and that means to be hopeful and positive (Colossians 4:2). We need to get up each day expecting good things. This is the day the Lord has made, be glad and thankful and REJOICE in it (Psalm 118:24)! This could be the very day that God makes it all come to pass. Speak as though it has happened, and act as though it is going to happen…NO matter what you see, feel or hear (Romans 4:17).

Many times a day, we are confronted with negative thoughts and opportunities to make the choice to plant a good thought based on the promise of God’s Word instead (Isaiah 5510-11). And WHEN our spouses come home, we especially need to keep filling those spots with a promise from God. Many times when our spouse leaves to go somewhere, we are confronted with a negative thought that comes and tries to get us down. The phone will ring, or they might “look” unhappy and we immediately jump to the wrong conclusion; leaning to our own understanding instead of trusting and acknowledging the power and promises of God (Proverbs 3:5-6). So before our spouses come home, God gives us these tests to show us how we will react because He doesn’t bring them home until WE are ready. So take those negative thoughts captive and fill those empty spaces up with “I am more than a conqueror through Christ.”…”I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”…”…”I am victorious because God causes me to be victorious!”

God will bring us through, but He makes us do the walking. We are learning the lessons now so that when our spouses ARE home, we will continue to be the spouses we were called to be. And the things we go through now all have a purpose…to get us to rely on God. So I pray that we will all work on taking those thoughts contrary to the promises and ways of God captive and filling their space with God’s promise. If God is for us, who could be against us? NO ONE! We can’t lose when Jesus is on our side (Romans 8:28-31)!

I hope this is an encouragement to someone today…this could BE THE DAY!!!

FAMM is extremely blessed that so many of our members remain active in the fellowship even after their marriages are restored, because they provide such unique insight and encouragement. In fact, three of our Board members have already been blessed with marriage restoration, and offer tremendous support and encouragement for those still waiting for that blessed day! Karla, who has a Restored Marriage and was just elected to serve on the FAMM Board of Directors last night, posted a wonderful After Marriage Restoration testimony on the private website today, which I know will be a great blessing to everyone standing for marriage restoration; especially since it is based on insight provided by her husband! So I thank SNO (spouse name omitted) for his willingness to share his insight for the benefit of others still waiting for their marriages to be restored and for Karla’s permission to share her post here.

As I read Karla’s post earlier today, several things ran through my mind. One was how she overcame one of the biggest challenges for men and women standing for marriage restoration, and made a DECISION to STOP taking offense. It’s just NOT possible to bring healing and wholeness to a relationship with someone when we are constantly offended by everything they say and do; because they just feel like they can’t win with us, so why even try. And as Proverbs 17:9 says, He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends. And SNO’s insight just confirms that, because Karla really had to work on NOT taking offense and leaning to her own negative understanding in response to just about everything SNO said or did; something everyone standing for marriage restoration relates to if honest. So we have to learn to TRUST GOD enough to OBEY Him and learn to DO things HIS way, because when we do, we can be ABSOLUTELY certain that HE will HONOR and UPHOLD His awesome promise in Psalm 37:5-6, which declares Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. And when we REALLY believe that, we KNOW that WE don’t have to run our mouths, nag, complain and pitch fits to defend ourselves and try to get our way; because we know that we can entrust ourselves to God as instructed in 1 Peter 2:18-25; particularly verses 21-23. And it is by NO means just a coincidence that this is the passage of scripture that comes before 1 Peter 3; which provides very specific instructions to husbands and wives and even refers BACK to this passage (in the same way) and further expounds upon it! And as SNO shared with Karla; just as soon as she stopped trying to make everything all about HER issues, and put her focus on the Lord and the work He wanted to do in HER, he noticed! In fact, later he even shared that he felt like she had taken her foot off of his lungs and he could breathe again! Now that’s a pretty powerful statement and one I sure do hope and pray that everyone standing for marriage restoration, especially if still taking offense and making everything all about THEIR issues, will get!

When Karla stopped making everything about HER feelings, HER disappointment, HER pain and HER issues, and put her focus on Jesus and even what her husband was going through, she demonstrated and experienced the power and promise of what Jesus said in Mark 9:35, which says Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.” And then in Mark 10:29-31, Jesus even said “I tell you the truth,” Jesus replied, “no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.” And one thing men and women with Restored Marriages will attest to is that they had to LET GO to GET what God was waiting to bless them with, and that it is without a doubt so much better than anything they ever had before! But without TRULY letting go and ENTRUSTING EVERYTHING TO GOD, full and complete marriage restoration is not very likely or lasting. But when we do let go and realize that we have to give our marriages, our spouses, and EVERYTHING that concerns us (and them) to the Lord as we grow in our walk and relationship with HIM, and stand in FAITH and OBEDIENCE on the power and promise of His Word, we will be blessed and encouraged and understand that the only “me” there’s room for in our marriage is HIM!

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Taking the “I” out of MarrIage, SeparatIon, and Divorce by Karla
I, I, I, me, me, me……. Those are the words that my husband used to describe me in our marriage, in our separation, and had I not come to FAMM, a likely divorce. I am sure you noticed the capital I in each of those words; I did that for a reason.

It wasn’t that SNO was saying I was selfish. What he was saying was that it was always about MY pain, MY hurts, MY fears, MY needs, and MY negativity. During our marriage, if he did something to offend me, it was all about my pain…I felt this and I felt that, blah, blah, blah. During our separation, as one might imagine, it went to an all time high; I can’t believe he did that to me, I am in so much pain, I am so sad, I am so angry.

Well guess what? After I came to FAMM, and really and truly (and I emphasize really and truly) let go, it wasn’t all about me anymore. It was about God and my marriage, and my husband noticed! It was only about me in that I had a lot of work to do on myself and in my walk with Christ, and I had to come to grips with my failures as a Christian wife. And before finally letting go, I went back and read the eulogy that I had written and presented at my father’s funeral earlier this year. There I was talking about forgiving, and letting go, though I had not done either of them. And that was a hard pill to swallow.

SNO jokingly asked me the other night what I was going to write about now that he was home. He was half serious though, because he knows I have always loved to write, and he has loved reading my posts. I told him I wasn’t sure, but then God immediately put it on my heart as I sat there to ask him for his perspective so I might share it with all of you. How great is our God? How great is my husband? He said yes!! Praise God!!

So I jokingly went into “interview” mode to put him at ease and then asked if his decision to come back was a sudden one. Guess what? The answer was NO. Wow, was that a surprise! As I shared in a post last month; he noticed immediately when I let go. He felt like he could breathe again. The other thing he said he noticed was that I quit talking about my pain, my hurt, and my circumstances; he saw that it was not all about me anymore. If I started a sentence with I, it was not followed with the word “feel.” I started talking about him, how his work was going, etcetera, and I soon learned that he was in just as much pain; even though he was the one who had left each time. He said that he noticed my focus changing from me, me, me, to God, God, God.

Yes, I understand your pain all too well, because I have lived it. But I feel compelled to share that our spouses are watching us. They are listening to what we say and how we say it. They are even watching our body language and our overall attitudes. So if any of you are struggling with the “I” and “my circumstances” syndrome, please take it to God, and not your spouse in any way. Perhaps you realize that already, but it is just a reminder since SNO specifically pointed that out to me. He noticed as soon as I stopped talking and acting that way. And your spouse will too.

God deserves all the glory for allowing my husband and I to talk candidly about our marriage, and I praise HIM for helping me take the “I” out of marriage. If you look at the first letter and last letter of the word marriage, it is “me” and the only “me” God wants us to focus on is HIM. And I praise God that for the first time, He is the center of our marriage, and not ME.

Love and Blessings, Karla

(Note from Linda: Even though I ALWAYS stand in awe of the way God seems to get on a particular message and not let it go and then how applicable it is to the lives of the men and women I’m ministering to at the time; this time seems even more imperative than most, and the obvious message is indeed that GOD IS BIGGER AND MORE POWERFUL THAN ANY PROBLEM OR OBSTACLE WE FACE as we stand for the restoration of our marriages and families!!! And Lorraine’s Coffee Break devotional this morning continues that theme in a very powerful way…so get that and you will indeed be blessed and encouraged beyond belief!!! Dear Lord, may the hearts, minds and spirits of those who need to understand and walk in the power and victory of this message from You get it today for the praise, honor and glory of Jesus Christ! And may it be the key to many marriage and family restorations this season when we particularly remember the blessed birth of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, which we ask in His name and authority! AMEN!)

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“Who hath measured the waters in the hollow of his hand, and meted out heaven with the span, and comprehended the dust of the earth in a measure, and weighed the mountains in scales, and the hills in a balance?” Isaiah 40:12

On Wednesday nights at church we have been watching a video teaching by John Bevere. Last night he was talking about the awesomeness of God- exactly how big and how great God is. He used the scripture above and began to compare the size of God with the universe in terms we could understand (although it’s still hard to wrap our little finite minds around some of those figures). He talked about the size of the universe and how long it takes to get to our closet star. If we traveled in a jet from the earth to the sun it would take 21 years to get there. Our next closet star is over four million light years away. He went on to say that our galaxy is only one of millions that are out there, yet as big as the universe is, God can measure it with the span of His hand. There are billions of stars in the universe, but the Lord not only created them, but calls each one by name (and never forgets a name).

Personally, I can’t fathom how big the universe is, but God measures it with His hand. I can’t even fully comprehend the size of all the oceans in the world, but God counts every drop of water in them and holds them all combined in the palm of His hand. He knows how much the earth weighs. He sets the mountains and hills on a scale and weighs them like you would weigh a pound of meat. He knows how many grains of sand on the seashore. He knows how many blades of grass are in my front yard. He knows how many apples are on each tree, and He knows how many apples are in an apple seed waiting to be planted. He tells the ocean how far it can go on the shore. He knows the number of fish in the sea, birds in the air, cattle on the ground. There is no way to fully comprehend how big God truly is.

But at the same time, this big, awesome and amazing God knows me. He knows how many tears I cry when I am hurting. He knows the number of hairs on my head. He knows how many times my heart beats a minute. He knows my DNA without looking at it under a microscope. He knows how many blood cells are in my body. He knows my every thought even before I think them.

Don’t limit the Lord, He is bigger and greater than we have the ability to understand-He can do anything! But don’t limit Him either by thinking that He is so big that He doesn’t care about you or have time for you. You are more important to Him than the stars of the sky, the sands of the sea or the vastness of the universe. These are all evidence of the greatness of God. But He humbled Himself and took on the likeness of sinful flesh then died on the cross to take away your sins– that was His evidence of how great His love is for you.

Have a great day. He is bigger and greater than we will ever be able to understand but He loves us so much.

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Coffee Break is a morning devotional written by Lorraine Ezell, and available online and sent by email free of charge for the asking from About the Master’s Business Ministry, Inc.
So please feel free to call Lorraine at (601) 833-5278 or E-mail her at mastersbusiness@bellsouth.net
And you can visit her on the web at MastersBusiness.org.

We greatly appreciate and thank Lorraine for her permission to share and reprint her Coffee Break devotionals here to bless and encourage our visitors!

I just had to take a minute to share this powerful message from Glenn Jackson, because he expressed so well the consequences of whether we choose to dwell and focus on our problems or the power and promise of our God!!! This is such a VITALLY important message for everyone standing for marriage restoration and against the work of the devil for anything in the spiritual realm! So be blessed and encouraged as you read the following…and go to his site and sign up to receive one or more of his daily messages; they will without a doubt keep you focused on the Word and that’s where the victory awaits all of us as Christians! And never forget that there is ALWAYS and undeniable correlation between the reality of our lives and the time we spend in God’s Word…and in the DOING of it!!!

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The Life Of Faith And The Glorious Church December 4th 2008
THE GREAT DANGER OF MAINTAINING DOUBT AND UNBELIEF IN THIS HOUR
….”For the vision is yet for the appointed time; It hastens towards the goal, and it will not fail [lie]. Though it tarries, wait [patiently] for it; For it will certainly come, it will not delay [be one second longer than it takes for the Father to accomplish His perfect purpose]”…. Habakkuk 2:3 NASB
One of the “spirits” that is attacking all those in the Church who have been holding fast to the vision and plan that the Father has given them is called a “strong spirit of doubt and unbelief” [double-mindedness], and is always sent when Satan and his schemes are in total disarray and defeat [which they are] – in one last futile effort to stop the “fullness” of the Father’s will coming into manifestation in the physical realm. What this spirit seeks to operate from is ANY trace of remaining ground [fear – pride – rebellion] they can find in the child of God they are sent against. As the child of God remains rooted and grounded in the Word of God, and their confession of that Word remains strong then it is certain that the scheme of Satan against them shall fall far, far short of the goal – almost to the point where the one who will “hold fast” at all cost to themselves to the will of God in the face of the attack will wonder in their heart, “Is that the best that the Devil can come up with?” Other than a few unpleasant “feelings” and a bit of “discomfort” experienced [for they already have a “revelation” in their heart of the Father’s will] the faithful child of God will then enter into glorious victory and a superabundant joy – thus completing the total devastation of Satan and his schemes, and bringing forth the full manifestation of their travail in the Holy Spirit. On the other hand, this “spirit of doubt and unbelief” will take the unrepentant child of God who is not “rooted and grounded” in the Word of God and easily move them to place far outside the center of the Father’s will – wherein, “eventually”, the forces of evil can kill, destroy or steal from them at will. Let us be those who are found “abiding” in an absolute faith and trust in the Word of God – for it is in this way alone that we will be continually empowered to rise above the evil spirits sent against us in this hour to take us out of the perfect will of the Father for our life and ministry.
Related Scriptures: 2 Corinthians 5:7; John 20:24-29;
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You can visit Glenn on the web at this link, where you can read (and even listen to) so many more of his powerful messages and sign up to receive them every day of the week by email.

When standing for marriage restoration, times when we have to choose are inevitable…and the choices are ALWAYS the same; even though they vary from one situation and circumstance to the other, because our choice ALWAYS comes down to the same thing; whether we believe God or not; whether we trust the Lord or not; whether we take God at His Word or not; whether we choose to focus on the problem or the promise; and whether to obey or not. And it’s ALWAYS one or the other because there is no middle of the road with God. Things are either right or wrong, bring blessings or curses, lead to victory or defeat, and either further God’s kingdom or Satan’s. So one of the most disheartening experiences in ministry is when someone who appears to be very good at talking the talk ends up not being able to walk the walk. And the reason is ALWAYS the same; they lost sight of the promise because they wouldn’t stop looking at the problem, and contrary to every profession otherwise, when it came right down to it, they obviously believed that the power of the problem was greater than the power of God’s promise. And when I read Lorraine’s Coffee Break devotional today, I was reminded of a previous Seeds Of Faith post I wrote about that, The Problem or the Promise, because we really can’t focus on both or expect to have both; it’s one or the other, which Lorraine’s message illustrated so well. So I went back to read that post again and also found Walking the Talk and We Stand in FAITH—NOT in Doubt and Disbelief!, and want to share them along with Lorraine’s message to help anyone who might not yet understand how important it is to make the RIGHT choice when the inevitable comes and the power of our problems challenge the faith we have in the power of God’s promise. And as He is always faithful to do, God used Lorraine’s message to confirm a conversation I had with a FAM member last night about having to choose between the promise or the problem and how we can’t have both; that we either give way to fear or faith because it’s always one or the other; that they cancel each other out! So I hope and pray that when the time inevitably comes to choose between our problems and the power and promise of God’s Word and His unfailing faithfulness, we will always choose to give our problems to God and be blessed and encouraged because we KNOW that NO wisdom, NO insight and NO plan can EVER succeed against the Lord (Proverbs 21:30!

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Where Are You Looking? By Lorraine Ezell
“Therefore I will look unto the LORD; I will wait for the God of my salvation: my God will hear me.” Micah 7:7

Do you know why we get discouraged? Do you know why we get fearful? Do you know why we start murmuring and complaining? Do you know why we get discontent? It’s
because of where we are looking! When the Israelites looked at the giants that were in the land, they got fearful. When Peter looked at the winds and waves, he began to sink. When Lot’s wife looked at the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, she became a pillar of stone. When the Israelite army looked at the size of Goliath, their hearts sank in fear.
When we look at what we don’t have instead of what we do have, we become ungrateful and begin to complain. The Israelites looked at the meat they didn’t have and complained
against God instead of looking at the manna that He was sending them each day. When we look at our problem instead of looking to the “hills from whence cometh our help”,
we become fearful and faithless. When we look at the situation instead of looking to God, doubt and discouragement will come in. When we look at the mountain, we lose faith and give up.

When you read some of the writings of David in the Psalms, you’ll read words of complaint and petition. He’ll say such things as- my enemies pursue me, they are stronger than I am, they are out to get me, my soul is cast down, I am in distress, my strength is gone, etc. But don’t stop there he always goes on to say- but the Lord is my
helper, I will put my trust and faith in the Lord, the Lord will show me the way to take, He shall destroy my enemies, He is on my side. This is what I like most about David- one minute he may be acknowledging his problem, but the next minute he is acknowledging the power and provision of His God. You can tell when he turns from the problem to faith in God- there seems to be a ‘dividing line’. Do you know what the difference was? He stopped looking in one direction and started looking in another. He stopped looking at his problem and started looking at God (his problem solver, the One who was greater than his problem, the One who was able to handle his problem).
Where are you looking this morning- at the storm, at the giants, at the mountain, at the impossibility of the situation? Are you looking at the great I Am, the Healer, the Deliverer, the Redeemer, the Supplier? Where you look will determine if you are defeated or have victory. Where you look will either make you grateful or ungrateful, fearful or full of faith, discouraged or encouraged, depressed or at peace. It all
boils down to what you are looking at- God or the problem.

Have a great day. What are you looking at?

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Coffee Break is a morning devotional written by Lorraine Ezell, and available online and sent by email free of charge for the asking from About the Master’s Business Ministry, Inc.
So please feel free to call Lorraine at (601) 833-5278 or E-mail her at mastersbusiness@bellsouth.net
And you can visit her on the web at MastersBusiness.org.

We greatly appreciate and thank Lorraine for her permission to share and reprint her Coffee Break devotionals here to bless and encourage our visitors!

(Note from Linda: I just had to share this wonderful message from Lorraine today! Boy, does she nail it! And I have no doubt that this is something we all can relate to and something that applies to everyone standing for marriage restoration! So please take Lorraine’s godly counsel to heart and put it into practice, and you will without a doubt be blessed and encouraged!)

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“This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.”
Psalm 118:24

A while back I read a little sign that was hanging on an office wall- I have also received it as an email (you probably have too). I want to share it with you this morning. It said, “Good morning, this is God. I will be handling all your problems today. I will not need your help… so have a good day.”

I thought it was a good reminder. When problems arise… not if… when… because they do arise, and more frequently than we wish, we tend to try to handle them ourselves. Even if we go to God with them, it’s not long before we find our hands on them trying to solve the problem, trying to manipulate the situation, trying to make something happen. The end result of our “help” usually only makes matters worse. Abraham and Sarah tried to help God and got an Ishmael.

Are you trying to “help” God? Are you trying to tell Him how to solve the problem? Are you trying to take matters into your own hands? Are you trying to make something happen? Are you pushing God aside and trying to figure it out on your own? Or are you letting Him handle the problem- the whole problem- His way, according to His wisdom and plan, in His own time? Are you going to let go and take your hands off and trust Him to handle it? I would have a terrible problem if I had to figure out how to create a day. But He solved the “problem” of how to create it… because it was no problem for Him at all.

“The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.” (Luke 18:27)

Let the fact that today is here be a reminder to you that He is well able to handle anything on His own and does not need your help. If He does need it… like my parents used to tell me… “if I need your help, I’ll ask for it”.

Have a great day. He doesn’t need your help, if He does He’ll ask for it, so take your hands off or you are going to wind up giving Him more than one problem to solve.

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Coffee Break is a morning devotional written by Lorraine Ezell, and available online and sent by email free of charge for the asking from About the Master’s Business Ministry, Inc.
So please feel free to call Lorraine at (601) 833-5278 or E-mail her at mastersbusiness@bellsouth.net
And you can visit her on the web at MastersBusiness.org.

We greatly appreciate and thank Lorraine for her permission to share and reprint her Coffee Break devotionals here for our visitors!

(Note from Linda: Karla posted the followingAfter Marriage Restoration testimony and praise for the wonderful work of the Lord in her life and marriage on the private site earlier today, and I greatly appreciate her permission to share it here to help encourage everyone still waiting for that awesome moment when your spouse moves back home! So put all of your hope, faith and confidence in our God Almighty as you learn to stand in faith and obedience on the power and promise of His Word and you will indeed be blessed and encouraged!)

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Hello FAMM family,

Well, God works in mysterious, yet wonderful ways! As I sit here typing this, I am in tears because I am watching my husband unload his truck as he moves home. PRAISE GOD!! I am watching boxes being unloaded, drawers being filled, and my house becoming a home again. And I have to give God all the glory, honor, and praise! The tears are tears of joy, and tears that remind me of where my husband and I have been. It’s as if God is taking each box that SNO (spouse name omitted) brings in and using it to wash away the pain of seeing the same box leave with him seven and a half months ago. Don’t get me wrong; God had healed those wounds, but today, with each box brought home, he is somehow erasing the wounds completely. It is the most unexplainable feeling.

I decided to drive home from New York last night instead of today, so it was an easier trip for the kids; bad weather was coming…plus I just wanted to get home. And when I got home at 11:30pm, SNO was here. He had said that he would be, but I had hit bad weather and got back quite a bit later than I had told him I would be, so I was surprised that he was here. And as I pulled into the garage, I could see that his winter coats were hanging on the rack where they always did, and all I could think was “Praise God!”

When I went upstairs, there he sat in his chair; he had a fire burning, and for a moment, it was like he had never left. It was surreal. We watched some TV, and then he asked if I was tired. When I said yes, he said “Well, let’s head upstairs then.” So I asked if he was staying, and he said yes! Again, I praised God, because he had not stayed overnight in our house since the night he moved out in April. Once again, it was as if he never left. Everything was as it was, yet it was so much more.

I had noticed that he had not moved anything else home, but said nothing. When we woke up, he made us all pancakes for breakfast and we just hung out and then had lunch. About an hour ago, I asked him what he wanted to do today and his answer was “I want to start moving my stuff home.” I don’t remember what was said after that, but I know I was grinning. He started down the steps to leave and the kids asked what stuff he was moving home, and he said “All of my stuff.” Then they asked why, and he said “I am moving back home.” The kids just went crazy; they didn’t see this coming, because I had not said anything about it.

So here I sit, feeling a bit overwhelmed as God erases the painful memory of boxes leaving with the joy of seeing boxes returning. I wish I could explain the healing God has given me through watching him move home. It is like God is showing me that He is erasing all of the pain of the past, right before my eyes. He truly does make all things new.

So I ask that when your spouses move back home, look at those cardboard boxes as they carry them in; look at them hard. You will have such an appreciation for what those boxes represent. They are erasers; God’s erasers, so thank God for every one of them. God has been a great healer, but most importantly, he has been the wonderful eraser of my pain. Seven and a half months ago, I was on my knees crying out to God as my husband packed up and left. And today, I am on my knees praising him for this miraculous blessing. He never left me; He was with me all this time.

Thank you, FAMM family, for supporting me, and encouraging me. I would not be witnessing my husband move home right now if it was not for Linda, all of you, and this ministry. My husband is home because he says he has the wife he always wanted. I would not have been able to let go and make the changes needed in me without FAMM. I love you all, and I cannot wait to read all of the restoration testimonies that are coming…and believe me; they are coming. God Bless!! Karla

As I consider all there is to give thanks to the Lord for this Thanksgiving season, the magnitude of it all is almost overwhelming! He has blessed Faith And Marriage Ministries with so much in the past year that it truly is more than we ever could have asked or imagined! So I want to offer my deeply heartfelt thanks and praise to the Lord by sharing just some of the most amazing things FAM members have been blessed to witness in the past year for the praise, honor and glory of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior!

Since this time last year, we have been blessed by the Restored Marriage Testimonies of fifteen more couples, including the first remarriage of a FAM Fellowship member after divorce, which we were blessed to witness via teleconference (and for those who are deceived into believing the devil’s lies…they were just in their early twenties when they separated over two and a half years ago and have no children and no contact much of the year before their SUDDEN restoration just a few months ago)! We have literally watched in amazement as the inexpressible power of God’s Word has radically renewed and transformed the hearts and lives of one man and woman after another. And we have witnessed physical healings and heard testimonies of deliverance from alcohol and drug abuse; including the testimony of a new FAM member delivered from Methamphetamines after years and years of being in and out of jail and treatment programs…all to no avail! We have been blessed to witness the Lord quickly and radically change the hearts and attitudes of one spouse after another when standers learned to claim and stand on the power and promise of God’s Word for the restoration of their marriages and were blessed as their spouses’ hearts and attention miraculously turn back to them and their children. We’ve seen financial blessings come through at the very last minute to meet the financial needs of one FAM member after another. In fact, just yesterday, despite the terrible real estate market and very unlikely odds, one of our members shared that her house was sold within days of putting it on the market for the amount needed and that she and her newly restored husband were able to buy their dream home, which they will be moving into next month! And we’ve seen one FAM member after another blessed with God’s SUPERNATURAL favor and protection when seeking housing, employment, promotions and in many other ways; including when one of our Board members was TOTALLY unharmed in a head on collision with a truck that so demolished his car that he had to be cut out of it…and even though items all around him (including his glasses) were crushed and he was covered with glass, he didn’t have a scratch on him and had NO injuries other than some possibly fractured and definitely bruised ribs, which healed very rapidly! And out of all of the marriages FAMM has been blessed to see restored over the past few years, as far as I know, with the possible exception of two, they are all going strong and getting better and better with passing time. We even have two new babies on the way After Restoration…plus one on the way even BEFORE restoration! And one of our new members this past year was actually persuaded not to have another abortion, which she was ready to do when she found out that she was pregnant again soon after her husband left. She was assured that the medical bills would be taken care of if necessary and that we would find a good home for the baby…BUT GOD! She kept the baby and fell madly in love with her as soon as she was born and now she and her husband are actually working on restoration! We’ve even had new members realize that they needed to stand for their covenant marriages instead of the non-covenant marriages that were the result of adulterous relationships, and FAMM has truly been blessed by the insight brought to the ministry through The Prodigal Perspective! Simply put; we have seen the great and mighty power of our loving and ever so faithful God Almighty moving in our midst in biblical proportions and we know that He is far from done yet!

Additionally, one year ago, FAMM was transferred from a privately owned and managed entity to an incorporated non-profit organization that is now under the leadership and direction of an international Board of Directors to insure its longevity and that it continues long beyond those of us currently involved in the ministry. And thanks to the very generous support and contributions of the FAM Fellowship members, our websites were finally upgraded and updated and we received the funds needed for our 501(C)3 tax exempt application with IRS. And in the past year, we’ve added ONE HUNDRED new FAM fellowship members to our family, and out of those new members, nine have already experienced restored marriages and many others are definitely moving in that direction! (The other six restored marriages over the past year were two FAM members who joined in 2006, two members who joined in 2007 and two men we ministered to and prayed for even though they didn’t have computer access and couldn’t join and participate in the fellowship.) And we’re looking forward to even more BIG changes in the coming year as we make getting some books published a higher priority, and I prepare to accept speaking engagements as the Lord leads. So please keep Faith And Marriage Ministries in your prayers as we step out in faith to see where the Lord intends to take the ministry in the year to come.

On a more personal level; it’s really not possible to express the utter joy and amazement I’ve experienced this past year and the work the Lord has done in my own heart, mind and spirit! For the first time in my life, I know and understand the inexpressible joy of truly being sold out for Jesus and that when we are, NOTHING ELSE MATTERS…and nothing else will ever bring the same kind of satisfaction or joy. So I hope and pray that everyone will come to realize and KNOW just how faithful God truly is to His Word and that we will NEVER go wrong or be disappointed when we learn to surrender EVERYTHING to Him and to FULLY rely on the power and promise of His Word. And I encourage everyone to learn to thank and praise God for EVERYTHING; including every seemingly unanswered prayer. When I look back over my life for the past twenty years or so and recall some of the prayers the Lord did not answer, I can truly praise His Holy name for that now; because if He had answered them, I would not be where I am today and FAMM wouldn’t exist. And just as many of our members with restored marriages would agree; we can save ourselves so much grief and heartache if only we would realize that God’s plans for us are for GOOD (Jeremiah 29:11-12, Romans 8:28-33 and Genesis 50:20); that He CAN AND WILL bring them to pass (Isaiah 46:1011Isaiah 55:10-11 and Proverbs 21:30); that EVERYTHING that happens in our lives is EXACTLY as it MUST be for God’s will and plan to be perfected in our lives(Ephesians 1:4-14 and 1 Thessalonians 5:18). And let’s never forget that God will never withhold any GOOD thing from us when we seek Him with a pure heart and simply trust and obey Him! So seek the Lord with your whole heart, learn to truly trust and obey God, and PRAISE HIM IN ALL THINGS, and you WILL BE blessed and encouraged beyond belief!!!

Is it not from the mouth of the Most High that both calamities and good things come? (Lamentations 3:38)

The lions may grow weak and hungry, but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing. (Psalm 34:10)

For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless. O LORD Almighty, blessed is the man who trusts in you. (Psalm 84:11-12)

(Note from Linda: I’m sure the following message from “The Prodigal Perspective” will be a blessing and comfort to many who might feel discouraged today by thoughts of their spouses having a wonderful day with NCPs, because that’s just not the way it happens. MNO (member name omitted) is now standing for the restoration of her covenant marriage after having a non-covenant marriage annulled earlier this year, and we are all greatly blessed by her insight and the heart God has given her to share the word of her testimony so powerfully to help comfort and encourage others. So be blessed and encouraged!
To man belong the plans of the heart, but from God comes the reply of the tongue. – Proverbs 16:1)

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I wanted to take the time this morning to wish all of my FAMM family a wonderful Thanksgiving.

I know some of you will not be spending Thanksgiving with your spouse, so I want to give you some encouragement and assure you that your prodigal IS thinking of you today. They are thinking about all the previous Thanksgivings spent with their family. They are thinking about traditions that were started when you first became one. They are thinking about you!

Last year, I spent Thanksgiving alone with my new husband. We were not invited to any family gatherings as many family members were still upset about our divorces and non-covenant marriage. It was a very difficult day for me as I remembered all the times I had traveled three hours away to spend Thanksgiving with my husband’s family. And the thought of him driving there alone for the first time in over a decade was almost more than I could bear.

I pray for each and every one of us today, that our spouses will be touched by the Holy Spirit and know that they are loved and missed. And please know, that you are too!

God bless all of you. I am so thankful to have you in my life.

(Note from Linda: Karla shared the following message on the private site this morning and I greatly appreciate her permission to share it here as well, because it is such an important message for all of us; particularly those who will not spend the day with family as usual. So just remember that God is listening to what you are saying in the desert (Numbers 14) and He will DO what HE hears us saying! So let’s fill our hearts and mouths with praise and Thanksgiving and get ready to receive His richest blessings! Happy Thanks Giving and I pray that you will be blessed and encouraged today!)

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Happy Thanksgiving FAMM Family!!

I have had so many things to be thankful for recently that I wasn’t sure what to post first. However, due to a number of conversations SNO (spouse name omitted) and I have had in the last few days, I chose to write about what I have learned this year about Thanksgiving.
Growing up, I had many wonderful memories of the holidays, and Thanksgiving was very important to me as a child. Along with Christmas, Thanksgiving Day was a normal and happy day in a not so normal and not that happy childhood. That being said, one can imagine the emphasis I have naturally placed on the holidays. A lot of us have that idyllic vision of how Thanksgiving should look; you know…the turkey, the pumpkin pie, the family all together…everybody is happy, even if it is for just one day.

Well, I have clung to that vision right into my adult life, which worked out well until this year because God had other ideas for me this Thanksgiving. He had a message for me, which was “Thanksgiving is a state of mind.” But to be honest, I didn’t care for that message at first because I was facing my first Thanksgiving without my father, who died earlier this year, and painfully aware of the fact that not only would I not be spending Thanksgiving with my father; I was not going to spend Thanksgiving with my husband this year either. Well, I was planning a pretty big pity party for myself…poor me…not only do I have to spend a holiday without my Dad, but without my husband too. The irony couldn’t be thicker.

God is good and let me tell you why. I am in New York visiting my Aunt (my father’s sister) with my Mom and the kids. SNO was asked to come by my son weeks ago, but he said no, and I had prayed that he would change his mind. Surely God would not want me to be without my Dad AND my husband for the first time on a HOLIDAY! But He did.

So I have had to go deep with God these last few days. Here I am celebrating the fact that my husband told me Monday night that HE LOVED ME for the first time in months…rejoicing that my husband told me that I am the best thing that ever happened to him and that he misses me…and praising God that my husband said that he will be home soon…yep, it’s official now!!! Yet, here I was getting dangerously close to not being truly thankful and grateful because I was so caught up in not being with my husband for Thanksgiving, a holiday that I had put so much emphasis on my whole life.

So God had to teach me a valuable lesson; I was so caught up in the family togetherness of Thanksgiving, that I thought that my Thanksgiving was somehow tainted; not right, bittersweet, borderline disappointing. But God got my attention, and He spoke right through my husband, who said that this will probably be the only holiday that we ever spend apart again and he said “We have a lot to celebrate.” But it didn’t sink in at first…that we ever spend apart again….a lot to celebrate.
Then it sunk in…REALLY sunk in. God is so faithful, He never fails us. He sent a powerful message to me through the man I love and cherish.

Thanksgiving is still Thanksgiving whether you are alone, with your family, with friends, etc. It is still Thanksgiving whether you have the traditional turkey dinner or a Big Mac from McDonald’s. God wants us to have Thanksgiving in our hearts. He wants Thanksgiving to be a state of mind! Don’t get me wrong; I was thankful, but I had missed it, and had been missing it for years. And God decided this was the year to teach me what Thanksgiving really is; it is not a traditional holiday for me to love, but a state of mind that I needed to embrace daily. That means that Thanksgiving should be in my heart and mind every single day, and not just one Thursday out of every year. Thank you, God!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I am thankful for each and every one of you. I am thankful for the ministry, for Linda, and for the many marriage restorations and miracles we have seen, and for the ones to come! God Bless!

With each and every passing day and experience in marriage restoration ministry, I’m just more and more convinced than ever that in addition to the power and promise of God’s Word, one of the most important messages to convey to men and women standing for the restoration of their marriages and families is the SUPERNATURAL power of praise and thanksgiving. And while that seems so SIMPLE, it is still one of the most challenging messages to get across; because as humans in difficult times, we just seem naturally resistant to the idea that God actually expects us to love and trust Him so much that we can and will indeed praise and give thanks to Him in ALL CIRCUMSTANCES AND SITUATIONS! However, that is exactly what God expects from us and it breaks my heart to consider how many awesome miracles, blessings and breakthroughs have literally been tossed aside for lack of understanding the DIVINELY SUPERNATURAL power of praise and thanksgiving.

A favorite passage of scripture for many FAM Fellowship members, and one often quoted is Proverbs 3:5-6, and the part most often referred to is that we shouldn’t lean on our own understanding. And even though that is VITALLY important as we stand for marriage restoration, we seem to forget or fail to realize that the ONLY way to avoid doing that is to DO as also instructed in the rest of the passage; that we have to TRUST God with ALL of our hearts and ACKNOWLEDGE Him in ALL of our ways. And if we truly trust God with ALL OF OUR HEARTS and acknowledge Him in ALL OF OUR WAYS, we would and could NEVER stop praising Him and thanking Him…NO MATTER WHAT! That’s what Paul meant in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, when he said give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. In other words, NO MATTER WHAT is going on in our lives, it is the ONLY way God’s PERFECT plan for us can be perfected…and thanks to Jeremiah 29:11, Romans 8:28-35 and Genesis 50:20 and many other verses, we know that’s for our GOOD!

One of the unavoidable consequences of the ministry being blessed by the Lord with such growth and so many amazing testimonies as we witness His hand at work in many lives is that I no longer have the time I so love to devote to writing the Seeds Of Faith posts these days. But this is a topic well covered by previous posts, so I hope and pray that the following links to some of them will bless everyone standing for marriage restoration and encourage you to seek a greater understanding of the SUPERNATURAL power of praise and thanksgiving.

As recently shared in Understanding what Happens when we Magnify and Validate the Work of the Devil, the power of our tongues to Speak Life or Death took on a whole new meaning for me when I was writing that post and read Numbers 13-14 again, because somehow I never really caught that God actually DECLARED that as surely as He lives, He would DO the very things He had heard the Israelites SAY when they were in the desert! And that made me even more aware of how important what we say when we are in the deserts of our lives determines where we end up and how soon we get there! Don’t forget that God is the same yesterday, today and forever and that He is NOT a respecter of persons!

Something else I’ve observed is that the men and women with restored marriages and those with marriages the Lord is so obviously working to restore are those who understand the importance of what Melissa shared in a previous SOF post, May the Name of the Lord be Praised. And I have also observed that without exception, none of those continually talking about how much they are struggling and need prayer to keep standing have either restored marriages or real evidence that restoration is taking place in their lives and marriages. And those we see God working so mightily to restore and who have already been blessed with restored marriages are also those who devote their time and energy to praising the Lord and ministering support and encouragement to others…all of which is clearly declared over and over again in the Word of God.

But we will never understand the SUPERNATURAL power of praise and thanksgiving without realizing that we are Created for the Praise of His Glory! And we have to understand that praise is NOT an option; GOD COMMANDS Let Everything that has Breath praise the Lord!

Regular visitors to the site know that for the past couple of weeks, I have been trying to write a post about praise and thanksgiving, and ended up getting sidetracked with something else that seemed more pressing for one reason or another…but I was still determined that I had to share what God has put so strongly on my heart about the power and importance of praise and thanksgiving, which post after post on the private site was confirming! And just as God is ALWAYS so faithful to do, HE had a great reason for delaying MY plans; because HE had something so much better in mind! So as often happens, I just couldn’t believe it when I heard Charles Stanley’s TV broadcast message this weekend! And what a truly powerful message, A Thankful Heart truly is! I can’t possibly stress enough how important it is for every man and woman standing for marriage restoration to listen to this message, and more than once, and take notes. And you can use the Sermon Outline too, which always has links to the scripture references Dr. Stanley uses. One thing Dr. Stanly said that I SO agree with and have literally seen play out over and over again in the lives of the men and women I’ve been blessed to minister to over the past few years is that even though there is NO change in our circumstances or situations AT ALL, EVERYTHING changes when our attitude changes to one of sincere gratitude and we learn to truly have a thankful heart and give the Lord the praise and thanksgiving He so deserves! So please study and consider the above Seeds Of Faith posts, the scripture references they all include and Dr. Stanley’s powerful message, because when you really understand the DIVINELY SUPERNATURAL power of praise and thanksgiving, you will be blessed and encouraged beyond belief!!!