In the past week, we’ve had lots of posts and conversations about waiting, so it seems the topic would get old after awhile, but I have a feeling that’s not likely to ever happen! There’s just too much to learn about the power and importance of waiting, especially when we’re standing for the restoration of our marriages. Every day this week, I’ve received one or two email messages from FAM Fellowship members with devotionals or messages from other ministries related to waiting, so this is obviously a message the Lord really wants us to get! And what awesome testimonies He’s provided in the lives of some of the fellowship members to help make the point!

Even though I wrote about why we wait only last week, based on what I’ve seen the Lord doing in just the past few days, it’s very clear that one of the most important reasons for waiting is that it’s probably the only way God can move us from simple faith and belief to absolute trust and confidence; the only way we can experience the victory and abundance described in John 10:10 (AMP), where Jesus said The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows).

Unfortunately, I haven’t yet met a stander who didn’t have to go through a lot of hard times and waiting to get to the place of truly trusting God, and having absolute confidence that He will indeed DO exactly what His Word says He will do! But the good news is that none of the standers I know, including me, who have truly learned to rest in the Lord by putting all of their trust and confidence in Him regret what it took to get us there; and that’s really saying something! But it just confirms what Jeremiah 17:7-8 says, which is “But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.” And it’s only through our faith in Jesus that we have the confidence we need to approach the throne of God with boldness, just as Ephesians 3:12 (NLT) tells us; Because of Christ and our faith in him, we can now come boldly and confidently into God’s presence.

In addition to the three FAM Fellowship members I mentioned in yesterday’s SOF post, who recently shared their testimonies of how the lord pursued and wooed them after they gave up on the restoration of their marriages, earning their trust and confidence in the process; He just provided two more testimonies from FAM Fellowship members revealing how our trust and confidence are developed in Him as we wait. This is a remarkable testimony of how God works and how He moves to get us to the plan HE has for our lives and how serious He is about using the gifts and anointing He gives us for His purposes and glory!

Alex is a very gifted writer, as regular visitors to the site know by the many wonderful and thought provoking messages she’s shared with all of us since joining the ministry. But she recently encountered very unexpected financial woes when her state made radical changes to their mental health program, which drastically decreased her income without much notice. We were discussing that not more than a few weeks ago, when she asked me to pray for the Lord to give her guidance about what she wanted to do. So I asked her what she wanted to do. She said she knew it sounded silly, but what she’d really like to do is write lyrics for songs. But I didn’t think that was silly at all and I encouraged her, because I’m a VERY firm believer and testament to the fact that God gives us talents for His glory, and that’s how He wants us to use them. For instance, even as a teenager, I knew my God given talent was writing. I always won first place in every contest I entered as a kid, and often got one or two additional honorable mentions as well. But I couldn’t write unless it was about something I felt passionately about. And throughout most of my adult life, I’d ask God how I was supposed to be using my talent for His glory and I’d try to think of ways to use my writing for Him, but nothing ever felt right; there wasn’t ever anything that I felt passionate enough about to write about. I was often even frustrated about my failure to use what I knew was a gift from God for Him in some way, but I just couldn’t figure out how I was supposed to do that. Hopefully, I’m making up for all that lost time now! Anyway, the following is a praise report Alex posted on the ladies’ private website yesterday:

“I again need to praise God, because His plans for my life are unfolding in ways I never could have imagined. It’s like the scripture says “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us…” (Ephesians 3:20)

I have always enjoyed writing-poems, stories, and essays, but I had never considered making a career of it. When God got my attention 6 years ago and I started drawing closer to Him, my writing changed dramatically-particularly my poems. The stuff that came pouring out of me surprised me and I felt in my spirit that I could one day write lyrics, though I can’t read music. My mother-in-law read some of my newer material and told me she felt that I was to write music one day. And then she said, “This is a confirmation for you, isn’t it?” I had not revealed to her my desire to write music, but the Holy Spirit did! That was years ago and I have continued to write, but never knew how to proceed.

My current career is in mental health, but my state has really struggled under mental health care reform for the last several years. As a result, my rate of pay and my hours are being cut and I have felt the pinch in my pocketbook. It was real work for me to not be discouraged, and I wondered what God was up to, as I love my job. I know God is bringing every aspect of my life, including finances, under his divine order, but I wasn’t thrilled to be almost out of a job, and I felt the need to take on something part time. So I got a job waitressing this past week, so that I could earn some tips and because it’s one of the few jobs that’s flexible and that I could leave without burning bridges should I be able to get more clients. God reminded me of my desire to write music and what he spoke to me all those years ago. Growing in faith is important to me, so I sent some material in to a company in Nashville that markets contemporary Christian music, where a friend of mine has a connection. I was waiting to hear whether they were willing to help me make a demo and what kind of feedback they had for the lyrics themselves. This is where God does above and beyond what we can think or imagine. I got a letter yesterday from a company representative who asked me if I would be willing to sign on with a contract!! I was advised that the music could sound “canned”, so it was recommended that I find a professional co-writer to help put the lyrics to melody. Even though the Holy Spirit spoke to me about this 5 years ago, oh me of little faith just kind of buried it as a nice, but impractical dream. So all of you with your God-given dreams…bring them out, dust them off, ask Him to use your dreams and your talents for his glory and then watch out!

If he had not moved me out of my comfort zone by creating problems with my job and our finances, I would not have pursued this at all. God sometimes has to shake us up a little to make us see that we can have His “best” and not settle for what seems “good” or “safe”.”

Now that’s a pretty remarkable testimony of how God works and how He moves us to a place of trusting Him and putting our confidence in Him, but I don’t think that’s the end of the story, because, even though Alex doesn’t know about this yet, since I was unable to reach her by phone today due to her new work schedule (so she’ll be learning about this by reading it here!), I very seriously doubt that the call I got early this morning from another FAM Fellowship member who was unaware of Alex’s testimony and praise report, was just a coincidence! Jennifer called to tell me how the Lord was working in so many amazing ways in her life, and I sat in total awe and amazement as I heard her testimony unfold!

About four years ago, the Lord gave Jennifer a vision of herself in a music ministry, using her singing gift for His glory. He even gave her a vision of a flyer with her picture on it and she recalls that it even said “in the midst of the trial” on it, which meant nothing to her at the time. But beyond getting an excellent quote for the cost of making a demo CD, she never pursued it; thinking it just wasn’t possible or practical. Huh, when is what God asks us to do ever very practical! To make a long story shorter, her marital problems and divorce drastically changed her life and things with her husband became very bitter and angry, and she didn’t always react to the situation in a very God glorifying manner. In fact, Jennifer is the FAM Fellowship member I mentioned who called me last month, after falling away for awhile before the Lord got her attention. And since then she has seen Him working in ways far beyond anything she could ever ask or imagine, just as Alex said! Anyway, she found herself in quite a pickle, because of delays getting child support after she insisted on making her husband pay it through the child support system instead of directly to her, which he had been doing! In addition, over the past months, she had tried to work, but something always came up making it impossible for her to continue – either transportation or child care issues. She had even tried to go back to school to become a nurse, but had problems doing that too. God was putting up road blocks, or as I usually say, he was closing doors! Then she remembered the vision the Lord had given her about a ministry in music, and started praying about that and decided to step out on faith to see what happened. On the very same day Alex was offered a song writing contract, Jennifer had her picture taken and created flyers to help promote her new ministry. And she prayed for the Lord’s guidance and provision for additional sound tracks and the sound equipment, etc. needed to do what she was now feeling very strongly led by the Lord to do. Then yesterday morning she received an unexpected financial gift from her father, which she took as confirmation that she was on the right track! I didn’t even know that Jennifer was a singer, so I asked her to sing something for me, and I was floored! She didn’t sound anything like she sounds! But then I guess that’s the way it is with really good singers! And one of the reasons this is all so exciting for me is that one of my long range plans for FAM Ministries has always been to help mothers get back on their feet in times of crisis when their husbands leave and they aren’t able to support themselves and kids adequately. I always envisioned sending in a ministry team to help stabilize women emotionally and financially in the days of crisis immediately after their husbands first leave (many do leave their wives and kids in a real financial mess). Anyway, I felt the Holy Spirit lay it on my heart to help Jennifer get her ministry launched, so FAM Ministries is going to help her get her CD’s made and help with some other things she needs to do to get started, and I’m really excited about that. Due to personal financial challenges, this is a really strange time for the Lord to put that on my heart, but as I told Jennifer, she can give back to the ministry when she’s able…that’s what God means for us all to do anyway. So I have no doubt about doing this to help her do what the Lord has obviously called her to do and I have no doubt FAM will be blessed too, because of the trust and confidence I have in the Lord. But as I told Jennifer, singing other performers’ music isn’t nearly as good as being able to sing original songs, and since she also sings contemporary Christian music, I want to see if she and Alex can get together, especially since it’s not very likely that it’s just a coincidence that they both had visions so many years ago and both finally got around to DOING something about it at the exact same time! Now, instead of closed doors, I have no doubt both Alex and Jennifer are going to see nothing but opened doors from now on, because they’ve made a commitment to put their trust and confidence in the Lord and use the gifts and anointing He has given them for His glory! How awesome!

Hopefully, the next time we’re discouraged and disheartened by the waiting, we’ll remember the testimonies of these “real life” people and recall that God ALWAYS has a purpose for it, and that His purposes and plans are always good, just as Jeremiah 29:11 (AMP) promises; For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome.

Several fellowship members mentioned Joyce Meyer’s TV broadcast message this morning, which was about faith and trusting God with confidence, and since it and the other two messages in the series cover so much of what we’ve been talking about in the ministry lately, here are links to all three messages, which I encourage everyone to watch and study. Be blessed and encouraged!

Trusting God – Part I

Trusting God – Part II

Trusting God – Part III

Regular visitors to the website know how excited I tend to get when I see the Lord working on a particular theme; when the same topic comes up over and over again, repeatedly confirming the point God is trying to get across. Well, we’ve certainly had a theme at work in the ministry the past few days and it is very clearly complete surrender leads to God’s peace and contentment in all circumstances…THEN GOD WORKS MIRACULOUSLY! God is really on the move in our midst again, so I can’t wait to see what happens next!

As with all things, working in marriage restoration ministry has it’s ups and downs, and one of the greatest disappointments for me personally is seeing any of the FAM Fellowship members fall away; wrongly thinking that their marriage is beyond salvation and restoration and giving up on God. But if we don’t receive the faith and understanding needed in our spirit through the power of God’s Word and the Holy Spirit, we just won’t have the grace and anointing needed to withstand everything the devil brings against us to deceive us into believing that, which causes doubt and discouragement. So when that happens, there’s nothing to do about it other than pray and trust that seeds of truth (God’s Word) were planted and that they will bring forth a harvest at some time in the future. And that’s exactly what happened both yesterday and today!

One of the earliest FAM Fellowship members I hadn’t heard from in months called yesterday, and we talked for a very long time. She called to thank me for the things she had learned through the ministry and to update me on how the Lord has been working in her heart and life and in her relationship with her husband. As shared in two messages posted by other members on the private websites yesterday and today, she finally realized that she had to COMPLETELY surrender everything to God and agree to do things HIS way, because the consequences of not doing so had in fact become very dangerous and costly. It was such a blessing to hear her testimony of God’s amazing grace, mercy and faithfulness; how He continued to speak to her and woo her, even though she was not living in any way that would possibly please Him. But when He got her attention, He REALLY got it, and she FINALLY surrendered everything to Him and made a decision to do things HIS way no matter what! And she said that she couldn’t believe how it seemed that the very minute she made that decision, God started working in her husband’s heart too! It’s a very long testimony, but the bottom line is that she is now firmly and confidently standing for her marriage NO MATTER WHAT, and TRUSTING that God WILL restore it! In just a matter of a couple of weeks, the Lord has totally changed her relationship with her husband from one of two people filled with anger and rage, unforgiveness and bitterness into one of two people who now understand and appreciate how special they are to each other as they experience and enjoy genuine friendship and companionship again! And that all started when she humbled herself and shared with her husband everything the Lord had revealed to her about how much she had hurt him and the “baggage” she had brought into their marriage. She is very much in awe of what she’s seen the Lord do, and most of all, the peace and contentment she now has because she let it all go and is ready to do and accept whatever God’s will is for her life. She said one thing that just totally blows her away is how God REALLY changes hearts, which she knows He did for her and which He is now doing for her husband…and how fast things can totally turn around! That’s why it’s SO important to wait, because God is ALWAYS working, even when we can’t see it, and when the time is right, what He has been doing behind the scenes will be revealed and we won’t believe it. But if we give up, we’ll never see it. That doesn’t mean that it wasn’t done; just that we didn’t wait long enough for it to be revealed.

Then again today, another one of the earlier FAM Fellowship members that I hadn’t heard from in a long time, called to update me on how the Lord has been working In her life and in her relationship with her husband. Her testimony was very similar in that she finally realized that she HAD to let everything go, and that she couldn’t believe the peace she found when she did and how the Lord had totally changed her in the process. And, just as with the woman who called yesterday, she said she couldn’t believe how her husband’s attitude toward her changed miraculously just as soon as she let things go and decided to stop trying to “manage” everything herself! She wanted to share with me that for the first time in a long time, they were on the phone today, laughing and joking with each other, which she just couldn’t believe! This was another relationship where she had done a GREAT deal of damage – even to the point of her husband accusing her of attempted murder!

So an important lesson learned and proven by these calls, in addition to another one just like them last month, is that GOD’S GRACE IS SUFFICIENT!!! If we don’t give up, no matter how bad things look, God CAN and WILL turn things around IN HIS TIME! So not waiting, giving up on God, is the one thing that can keep our marriages from being restored. But when we surrender our will and put all of our trust in God, we will experience peace and be content to wait, just as Dan and Thursa attest to in the following posts, which they shared on the private websites yesterday and today respectively, for which I appreciate their permission to share here. As I consider the testimonies of the two ladies I talked to yesterday and today, and what Dan and Thursa have shared, I’m reminded of Matthew 11:28-29, where Jesus bids us “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. That certainly sounds like confirmation that if we surrender completely to Jesus Christ, we will know the peace and contentment that comes only from an intimate relationship with Him, and there’s certainly no better way to be blessed and encouraged!

This past Saturday, I attended graduation celebrations for two of my nieces. And one year ago, I attended the graduation celebration for my son. What a difference a year makes – and a closer walk with God!
My son’s high school graduation celebration last year was held in conjunction with several other boys – perhaps about 10, and I had just moved out of our house two weeks before the event. It was held at a bar and grill in our town, and what should have been an exciting and wonderful celebration was a dreaded and horrible experience for me. I felt completely out of place, as my wife flitted around the party like nothing was wrong. Yet, all of our friends and family knew the situation. I ended up “coping” with it by drinking too much and leaving early to avoid further suffering and pain. But before I left, I some how ended up with my wife’s purse! Being a little soused, I noticed her cell phone in her purse, and took it out. Something whispered to me, and I don’t think it was the Holy Spirit, but the jealousy that was raging through me at that point; and I rang the NCP’s number. I didn’t say a word, and just hung up when he answered. I guess I just wanted him to know that I, and not he, was at my son’s graduation party with my wife. Well, in all actuality, I was not with my wife either. Of course, you might well imagine how that all turned out; the phone call was not the wisest decision I ever made. Although I may get the giggles thinking about it now, I certainly don’t recommend anyone doing anything like that!
I’m sharing this now, because this weekend I realized how much I have grown in the spirit and my relationship with God. I am not where I need to be, but thank God I am not where I was, and I am on my way to being what He wants me to be! I have learned to say no to my “self” and yes to God. I had God’s love in my heart, but it was buried under personal ambitions, cares, and problems. I was trying to take care of my problems instead of letting God do it. In order to be healed I had to have a listening, receptive heart or I would not have seen any measure of restoration or any other of God’s blessings in my life.

And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.
Romans 5:5 (New Living Translation)

Disappointment would have always been the norm if my eyes were on men and not my Lord. God, and only God, can restore what has been lost, because it takes His miracle power to do it. I released God to work when I released my faith in Him. But I had to surrender to the will of God, which is to restore and heal the covenant marriage He put together. Dugh…what took me so long?
Well, that is where I have grown and learned. Believing, trusting, and being obedient to God was, and is not easy for me. However, I have come to believe from the scriptures, that Jesus is the answer for all things. He goes out ahead of us and makes a way for us.

5 “Is it not my family God has chosen?
Yes, he has made an everlasting covenant with me.
His agreement is arranged and guaranteed in every detail.
He will ensure my safety and success.
2 Samuel 23:5 (New Living Translation)

When something in life looks impossible or unpleasant, Jesus is there to pave the way for us to move forward. But I had to put serious effort into studying the Word if I intended to get anything out of it, and I have truly discovered that the more I invest in His Word, prayer, and worship the more He is there for me. God can’t reveal things to me if I do not make myself available to Him. So I have learned to submit myself to His will as He reveals it to me. (See 2 Samuel 22:19-37 below)
As I reread about Mary in Luke and how the angel came to her about the virgin birth, I saw how readily she was willing to agree with God’s promise and accept it. And then the miracle happened. So what I face today requires me to make a decision to agree with God and His promises and then expect the Holy Spirit to bring it to pass; thus our miracles! God’s strength is made available to the believing heart, and as we believe, He brings us to places we could never reach on our own, although I almost died trying!!

34 Mary asked the angel, “But how can this happen? I am a virgin.”
35 The angel replied, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the baby to be born will be holy, and he will be called the Son of God.
Luke 1:34-35 New Living Translation (NLT)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
Proverbs 3:5 (New Living Translation)

The power of prayer is for everyone. If we do our part, God is going to do His part every time! And we certainly know that our prayers for our marriages to be restored are indeed aligned with His will. So the more we read and understand the Word, the more we come to know God’s will, because His Word is a revelation of what it is God wants us to do. Prayer will not reach beyond His will, which is why it’s so important to understand what His will for us is. Then at the moment we pray, we are to believe that we will receive what we prayed for; not when circumstances look different; not at some point in the future, but when we pray and ask. God is there right then and has sent angels with the answer. We just have to be patient and wait for His timing, just as we have seen over and over in the FAM family.

14 And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him.
15 And since we know he hears us when we make our requests, we also know that he will give us what we ask for.
1 John 5:14-15 (New Living Translation)

As I looked around at the people at the celebrations this weekend, I was so sorrowful as I recognized the number of families who have been ravished by divorce; moms and dads sitting at different tables with new spouses, and the kids going back and forth from one “family” to the other. It broke my heart. But I was overcome with relief, because of my God, who is in control of my life and my marriage. It was as if God was pointing out to me that I must not succumb to Satan and allow him to destroy my family and my marriage. It was almost peaceful! I cannot believe the place God has brought me to, and I encourage everyone, no matter where you are in the process, to fight for your marriage. And more importantly, fight for what God has promised you; He wants His best for us and our loving spouses!!

19 They attacked me at a moment when I was in distress, but the Lord supported me.
20 He led me to a place of safety; he rescued me because he delights in me.
21 The Lord rewarded me for doing right; he restored me because of my innocence.
22 For I have kept the ways of the Lord;
23 I have followed all his regulations; I have never abandoned his decrees.
24 I am blameless before God; I have kept myself from sin.
25 The Lord rewarded me for doing right. He has seen my innocence.
26 “To the faithful you show yourself faithful; to those with integrity you show integrity.
27 To the pure you show yourself pure, but to the wicked you show yourself hostile.
28 You rescue the humble, but your eyes watch the proud and humiliate them.
29 O Lord, you are my lamp. The Lord lights up my darkness.
30 In your strength I can crush an army; with my God I can scale any wall.
31 “God’s way is perfect. All the Lord’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.
32 For who is God except the Lord? Who but our God is a solid rock?
33 God is my strong fortress, and he makes my way perfect.
34 He makes me as surefooted as a deer, enabling me to stand on mountain heights.
35 He trains my hands for battle; he strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow.
36 You have given me your shield of victory; your help[a] has made me great.
37 You have made a wide path for my feet to keep them from slipping.
2 Samuel 22:19-37 (New Living Translation)

I would like to first give God praise and honor in the wonderful ways He has shown His awesome power in my life. As Linda pointed out to me earlier today, we have come a long way from the beginning. I Praise God for every small and large step I have taken on that way. I thank God that He has taken every single step with me as I go. In fact, He hasn’t just taken the step with me, He has given me the legs and feet of strength, the courage and the spiritual armor I need to push forward to receive the tremendous blessings He has waiting for me. I am truly blessed to still have my entire family with me in my home. With that, I have had my own unique challenges and tests, which God continues to work out with me, as He shows me how I am to act and be in order for His glory to shine through me. I stumble, but I am so thankful that each and every time, God is there to pick me up, forgive me, put my tears in a bottle and then take my hand and lead me on to the next step. It brings tears to my eyes even now to think how unworthy I am of all the love and grace He continues to pour out on me. The only way I can even begin to show my love and appreciation to Him is to offer myself in complete surrender to Him. His ways are so far better than any of my ways. And I look forward to the opportunity I’ll have to share how my tests have become my complete marriage restoration testimony. I hope I am able to share it with many people, so they all may see God’s unfailing love for each of His children.

Today, I know God has answered prayers through a phone call my husband had with the NCP. I have no idea what was said or developed in that conversation; nor do I need to know. I only know about it because of a brief text my husband sent telling me they had talked. With Linda’s help and keen listening to the Holy Spirit (Thank you again, Linda), I did not respond at all to the text, and God has sent an overwhelming comfort to me in the last few minutes. The Holy Spirit has recalled many of my recent prayers and has just given me comfort that God is working and answering just as I have asked. I have peace in knowing that God’s grace IS sufficient for me. He has again taken my hand and said, “Look to me my child, for I will set your paths straight.”

Over the last day, the Holy Spirit has recalled to me over and over and OVER again Philippians 4:11-12 “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Just in the last few minutes, I now see the relevance and why I would need to hear that exact verse. Just as Paul found the “secret”, I too feel I have learned the “secret.” God’s grace is sufficient for me!!! I am completely content in my situation in waiting on God for the complete restoration of my marriage. My wait is not like being at the doctor’s office: uneventful and seemingly a waste of time. The wait I have in God is one of the most precious times in my life. So I praise and thank God that He has me right where I need to be; in His divine waiting room. I am learning so much about the unconditional love God has for me, and I want to obey Him and allow for His glory to shine in me. This is the secret; my secret to contentment is that His grace is sufficient! So I am willing and very content to wait on God and His perfect plan and timing!!!

One of the greatest hurdles to overcome as we stand for the restoration of our marriages is time, because it’s too easy to get tired and discouraged and want to give up waiting. Sadly, that apparently means we consider everything going on around us more credible than the Word of God, which must break our Lord’s heart. And even though we had a lot of great discussion about waiting in FAM Chat last Friday night, based on some private conversations today, it appears that we need to discuss it even more; because knowing why we wait and what to do while we wait are very important, but not nearly as important as understanding HOW to wait.

The reason waiting is so difficult is because we are trying to stand for our marriages in and of our own strength and ability, but in John 15:5, Jesus told us why that doesn’t work. He said “I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. Yet, on the other hand, Philippians 4:13 says I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. And 2 Corinthians 12:9 says But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. So God doesn’t expect us to have what it takes to stand for our marriages without Him, and Psalm 37:4-6, gives us the key to victoriously standing in the strength and grace of the Lord; it says Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

Obviously, we can’t rely on our own strength and ability to stand for the restoration of our marriages. Not only do we not have the power or ability to change our spouses; we don’t even have what it takes to stand the wait without the Lord. But any time God calls us to do something, He gives us everything we need to DO it and to get through it; if He calls us to it, He’ll get us through it. So that means we have to rely on God just to stand and Jesus told us very clearly how that’s possible in John 14:16-18 (NASB, which says “I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you. “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you..

As the Lord is ALWAYS so faithful to do, He provided additional confirmation for Friday’s SOF post and our chat Friday night, and answers for some of the questions that came up in several conversations with FAM Fellowship members today, in Charles Stanley’s TV broadcast message Sunday, titled Help is on the Way. The above link is to his sermon outline, where you can also watch or listen to the message, which I strongly encourage, because it’s a great study of who the Holy Spirit is and what He does. And at the end of the message Dr. Stanley discusses waiting, which he agrees is one of the most important principles for us as Christians. So listen to this important message and learn HOW TO WAIT, and be blessed and encouraged, because as Dr. Stanley said, help is on the way when we ask for it!

As I racked my brain for a topic for tonight’s FAM Chat, I was frustrated, because I was drawing a total blank. Usually we’ve had a prevailing topic of conversation through the week to draw from, but this week was mostly praise reports or some of the same issues we’ve recently discussed. So I even considered making it an evening for open discussion without a preset topic. And even though I wasn’t getting anything else, I immediately felt that wasn’t the way to go either. So I told the Lord that I was running out of time and REALLY needed some help here! So I prayed and prayed and then just waited to hear a reply…but NOTHING was coming! So I finally just said “Well, Lord, I’m waiting, but I’m not getting anything…” And that’s when I got it!

As I considered the frustration of waiting without seeing (or getting) anything, it came to me that while everyone is so excited to share in the awesome praise reports of so many of our members lately; it’s normal to wonder just how long it will be before “our turn” comes…why we’re still waiting for our own miracles, especially when nothing SEEMS to be happening. And as I thought about that, I remembered the following poem about waiting, which I’ve shared on the site previously, but which is ALWAYS worth taking another look at. So here it is:

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried.
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, ‘My Child, you must wait!’
‘Wait?’, you say, wait!’ my indignant reply.
‘Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By FAITH I have asked, and am claiming your Word.
‘My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to WAIT?
I’m needing a ‘yes’, a go-ahead sign,
Or even a ‘no’ to which I can resign.
‘And Lord, you promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord, I’ve been asking, and this is my cry;
I’m weary of asking I need a reply!’
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, ‘You must wait.’
So, I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, ‘So, I’m waiting…for what?’
He seemed then to kneel and His eyes wept with mine,
And he tenderly said, ‘I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.
All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want–but, you wouldn’t know ME.
‘You’d not know the depth of my love for each saint;
You’d not know the power that I give to the faint;
You’d not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You’d not learn to trust just by knowing I’m there;
You’d not know the joy of resting in me
When darkness and silence were all you could see.
‘You’d never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of my Spirit descends like a dove;
You’d know that I give and I save…(for a start),
But you’d not know the depth of the beat of my heart.
‘The glow of my comfort late into the night.
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that’s beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have LAST.
‘You’d never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that ‘My grace is sufficient for thee.’
Yes, your dreams for your loved ones overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss! If I lost what I’m doing in you!
‘So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
THAT THE GREATEST OF GIFTS IS TO GET TO KNOW ME.
And though oft may my answers seem terribly late,
My wisest of answers is still but to WAIT.’
–Author Unknown

As I reread this, which is one of my all time favorites, a few verses of scripture came to my mind, and they are what we MUST keep in mind as we wait on the Lord’s perfect time for HIS awesome plan for our lives to be perfected, and that He’s working on us during this time too. The first is Matthew 22:3738, which says Jesus replied: ” ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. If we’re honest, most of us have to admit that we fall far short of that, especially if we’re putting the restoration of our marriages above seeking a personal and intimate relationship with our Lord and Savior. That is not good, because even though we don’t often hear about this aspect of God’s nature and character, Exodus 34:14 tells us Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God. In fact, in last week’s chat, several members acknowledged having put their spouses and marriages as an idol above their relationship with God. And then there’s Psalm 37:4, which says Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. But as I thought about that one, I have to admit feeling an “ouch”, because the truth is that most of us don’t consistently delight in the Lord, even though we’re really good about delighting in Him WHEN we have something to praise and rejoice about…but that’s definitely putting the cart before the horse according to what this says. We are to FIRST delight in the Lord, and THEN He will give us the desire of our hearts…and not the other way around. And of course, that goes right along with Matthew 6:33, which says But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. And we have to believe in and fully expect to be rewarded and blessed according to God’s compassion and justice as we wait, because Isaiah 30:18 says Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him! And then I thought of Romans 8:28 (NASB), which says And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. When we really believe that, we’ll KNOW there IS a God glorifying reason for the delay in the restoration of our marriages and that God is working EVERYTHING out for our good because we love Him and we are living our lives in accordance to His will as revealed in the Bible….He hates divorce! So we just have to put our hope in the Lord, because Isaiah 40:31 promises but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. And based on the wonderful praise reports we get almost daily now from our members who have already experienced the restoration of their marriages, we know ours will be worth the wait too, because we are seeing how God is very faithfully restoring their marriages to be so much more and better than they ever had before, just as His Word said He would do! So instead of focusing so much on the time it’s taking and how long we’re waiting, let’s focus on getting to know our Lord and Savior better, and then there’s no way to avoid being supernaturally blessed and encouraged!

We are blessed to have so many FAM Fellowship members who really enjoy studying God’s Word and then share what they’ve learned with the rest of us. The following study of God’s grace and peace, which was posted on the ladies’ private website today, is a good example of that, so I greatly appreciate Thursa’s willingness to let me share it here as well. Be blessed and encouraged!

“The other day I was reading a devotional (sorry, I can not remember exactly what I was reading) and ended up doing a search on bible gateway for grace and peace, where the following 18 versus popped up:

Romans 1:7
To all in Rome who are loved by God and called to be saints: Grace and peace to you from God our Father and from the Lord Jesus Christ.

Romans 16:20
The God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet. The grace of our Lord Jesus be with you.

1 Corinthians 1:3
Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

2 Corinthians 1:2
Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

Galatians 1:3
Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ,

Ephesians 1:2
Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

Philippians 1:2
Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
Colossians 1:2

To the holy and faithful brothers in Christ at Colosse: Grace and peace to you from God our Father.

1 Thessalonians 1:1
Paul, Silas and Timothy, To the church of the Thessalonians in God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ: Grace and peace to you.
2 Thessalonians 1:2

Grace and peace to you from God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Timothy 1:2
To Timothy my true son in the faith: Grace, mercy and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.

2 Timothy 1:2
To Timothy, my dear son: Grace, mercy and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.

Titus 1:4
To Titus, my true son in our common faith: Grace and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Savior.

Philemon 1:3
Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Peter 1:2
who have been chosen according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, through the sanctifying work of the Spirit, for obedience to Jesus Christ and sprinkling by his blood: Grace and peace be yours in abundance.

2 Peter 1:2
Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord.

2 John 1:3
Grace, mercy and peace from God the Father and from Jesus Christ, the Father’s Son, will be with us in truth and love.

Revelation 1:5
Grace and peace to you from him who is, and who was, and who is to come, and from the seven spirits before his throne, and from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness, the firstborn from the dead, and the ruler of the kings of the earth.

As you can see, “grace and peace” are noted many times as coming from God. So I wondered exactly what “grace” is and how or why it is God gives it to us. I looked up the definition of “grace” in my little pocket dictionary and the first definition said, “unmerited divine assistance.” I then looked up peace “state of calm and quite.” So I’ve pondered this for the last few days and asked for God to show me exactly how it all fits together.

The compilation of all the things God has shared with me about this is that by looking to and for God in everything, ESPECIALLY our marriage restoration, He will send us His awesome grace (divine assistance). That is God WILL step in and do just as He has promised and restore our marriages. We’ve shared so many times how we see that God is on our side, if we just let go and let Him work…allow for God’s grace. When we do, with God’s grace (divine assistance), He also gives us His peace. As it says in Philippians 4:7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. God’s peace is something that no one can understand. So we shouldn’t be trying to understand why or how God is moving in our marriages, we should just have peace (calm and quite) in knowing that God IS working His grace!

And lastly, there’s the “unmerited” part of the definition of grace. Our purpose on earth is for God’s glory. We have not and can not “earn” our marriage restorations. God’s glory is the only reason our marriage restorations will manifest. The divine assistance in the restorations are unmerited by us and only meant for His Glory. THAT is our purpose; THAT is our marriage restoration purpose – for God’s glory. So we should again just know the restorations WILL come! As so many times we’ve seen in the post, this will happen in God’s perfect timing. Why His timing? Because it is perfect and He knows how to make His glory shine perfectly in each and every one of our restorations. God has already spoken and promised our restorations and each one of them will shine with His glory! From a needle to socks, they will ALL shine with His glory! So we must allow His grace to work and have the peace of knowing that His ways and timing are perfect.

So to each of you, may you look to God in everything and to you, may God send His wonderful grace and peace!”

As men and women standing for the restoration of our marriages, we are all too familiar with John 10:10, which says The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. But I wonder if we really understand the significance of that verse and how important it is to NEVER forget it and exactly what Satan wants to steal, kill and destroy. I had a totally different topic in mind for today’s post, but as I started to respond to something shared on the ladies’ private website tonight, I felt strongly led to write about the danger, and it’s a VERY REAL danger, that Satan poses as we stand for the restoration of our marriages.

One of the more interesting aspects of marriage restoration ministry is how much things are so much alike from one situation to the other, despite how different they are. The people are different, and the specific circumstances and situations are all different, but there’s so much that’s practically identical that it’s hard to believe sometimes. For instance, we’re all familiar with the uncanny fact that our spouses all seem to use the same words and phrases to explain why they’re doing what they’re doing. It’s like they’re all reading from the same script, which of course they are, because it all comes from the devil. And since most of us have that in common, we find it easy to relate to each other and even find comfort in knowing that we weren’t the only ones to have that experience.

But now as we see more and more restorations and even more significant breakthroughs, as one of our ladies shared today, an even more important similarity that we need to be aware of is becoming apparent. Everyone standing for marriage restoration is very much aware of how the devil attacks; how he does his wicked best to deceive us, often leading to doubt and discouragement, which usually leads to disobedience. But the pattern revealed by our most recent restorations and significant breakthroughs is how the level of attack by the devil really increases and intensifies just before (and even after) they take place. So that means we really have to take 1 Peter 5:6-9 to heart, because it says Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

There’s no way to overstate the importance of humbling ourselves under the mighty hand of God and casting all of our anxieties on Him, because we can be almost certain that something will come up when we are very close to restoration to cause us great anxiety or for our pride to rear its ugly head as we give way to our natural inclination to protect and defend ourselves. But we’re warned in Proverbs 16:18 that Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. And then Proverbs 13:10 (AMP) says By pride and insolence comes only contention, but with the well-advised is skillful and godly Wisdom. So it is by no means a big surprise that the devil most often uses pride to bring about the destruction he has planned for us as he does his wicked best to steal, kill and destroy our marriages and families. After all that’s one sin he is quite familiar with, since it’s what got him kicked out of heaven!

Fortunately, recognizing Satan’s method of operation is probably our best defense against it, because we know to be on the alert and to watch for it. And since we know that stalking lions always look for the weakest prey or one that’s injured or separated from the rest of the pack, it’s important to guard against making ourselves more vulnerable to Satan’s attack by forsaking the fellowship of others who help support and encourage us and keep us accountable. So when we feel doubt and discouragement, even though it is our natural reaction, we can’t withdraw from fellowship with others. In fact, it’s very important to have at least one person we can bounce our thoughts off of when we struggle to take them captive and make them obedient to Christ and the Word, because the chances are pretty good that that person will not be operating under the same force of deception Satan is using against us and can help shed the light of God’s truth on the matter, which sets us free. And NONE of us should think we are above falling into Satan’s trap, because as 1 Corinthians 10:12 (NASB) warns Therefore let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall.

Obviously, if Satan is more likely to intensify his attacks when we are closest to our breakthroughs, it’s vitally important for us to beware and always keep in mind that he only comes to kill, steal and destroy; and that when we find ourselves fretting, doubtful, discouraged, angry, and defensive or confused, he’s probably behind it. And one thing I’ve seen over and over again in this ministry is that it is in those moments that marriage restorations are won and lost, made and broken, and when the devil is either defeated or triumphant. And when we keep in mind that he wants to kill, steal and destroy the restoration of our marriages and families for God’s glory, we can probably figure out when he’s involved by whether or not the thought, emotion or action we’re contemplating, experiencing or considering makes our restoration more or less likely. So the next time Satan attacks, just remember that the restoration of your marriage could be soon and be blessed and encouraged!

Yesterday, the following reminder of how important it is for us to understand what God means by letting go and moving on, was shared on the men’s private site by Dan, and since it’s such an important message for all of us as we stand for the restoration of our marriages, I appreciate Dan’s permission to share it here since we literally have pages and pages of praise reports and testimonies on the private sites proving the truth of what he shared. Those who experience the restoration of their marriages are the ones who understand that standing for marriage restoration is a lot more about us and what God wants to do in our lives, and that we are totally powerless to change or do anything about what’s going on in our spouses’ lives. But God isn’t, and when He sees us making the changes He desires, then HE WILL do whatever it takes to bring His plan for the restoration of our marriages to pass, and we can rely on that, because in Isaiah 46:11, God said From the east I summon a bird of prey; from a far-off land, a man to fulfill my purpose. What I have said, that will I bring about; what I have planned, that will I do. And there’s NO DOUBT that understanding and practicing the wisdom provided in both of these messages, and believing and resting in God’s awesome promise to defend and uphold the covenant of our marriages, will greatly bless and encourage all of us!

This weekend, I’ve been reading in my Covenant Keeper’s manual and from “The Divine Conspiracy” by Dallas Willard. So I want to share a couple of the teachings, reiterating many of the things that we have heard over and over, but which are never the less, extremely important as we trust God to heal our marriages. It is so natural to allow our desire for marriage restoration to become a burden, but it is not until we relinquish our mates and our situations, that God can move on our behalf, which He desires to do. So “letting go” and “moving on” are important, but they must be done the way God intends.

Releasing our mates to God, does not mean judging or condemning them, and it does not mean using scripture or logic to convince them they are wrong and should come home. We also have to “go on with our lives”, which I’m sure we have all heard from our family and friends; but we do that by focusing on what God wants to remove and change in our lives, and not by finding someone else. And if we speak evil of our mates, we become not “a doer”, but a judge.

What we are actually doing with our high and mighty proper condemnations and our wonderful solutions, more often than not, is taking others out of their own responsibility and out of God’s hands, and trying to bring them under our control. Yet we should always respect other people as spiritual beings, who are responsible before God alone for the course they choose to take of their own free will.
It was when Abraham stopped trying to fulfill the covenant he had with God and released it by being obedient and placing Isaac on the altar that he began to walk in the blessing and provision of the Lord. And we have seen the same results in standers who have been obedient to God and have had their marriages restored.

We need to let go of our mates and give them over to God so He can work His will and purpose in their lives. But we don’t stop praying, confessing the Word or doing spiritual warfare on their behalf. And we let God work equally in our own life as we do that. The result is peace; and This peace is not God releasing us from our stand; we are simply taking our hands off the situation and releasing it to God. Most of us have realized that we cannot “fix it” on our own, or our marriages would have already been restored.

God does respect freedom of choice, but Satan does not. So it’s important to continue to intercede for our mates so that the Lord will bring provision and people across their paths that will lead them to choose God’s best, which we all know is a covenant marriage, restored and healed, with the Godly husband and wife He intended for us to be in the first place.

If we demonstrate God’s grace in our lives as we walk out our stand, it will do more to teach our friends and family about God’s covenant love and His will for marriage healing, than any Bible scripture we could use to “prove” our position. Blessings, as we believe, and trust and obey God’s Word.

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.
1 Peter 5:7 (New Living Translation)

Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.
Psalm 55:22 (New Living Translation)

“Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven. Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.”
Luke 6:37-38 (New Living Translation)

How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.
Matthew 7:3-5 (New Living Translation)

For merely listening to the law doesn’t make us right with God. It is obeying the law that makes us right in his sight.
Romans 2:13 (New Living Translation)

But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling yourselves. For if you listen to the word and don’t obey, it is like glancing at your face in a mirror.
James 1:22-23 (New Living Translation)

Don’t speak evil against each other, dear brothers and sisters.[a] If you criticize and judge each other, then you are criticizing and judging God’s law. But your job is to obey the law, not to judge whether it applies to you.
James 4:11 (New Living Translation)

As we stand for the restoration of our marriages, it’s so important to fully understand that God created us for His praise and glory, because that’s the only way we’ll ever have the victorious life Jesus came to give us. 1 Peter 2:9 tells us But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. And Psalm 150:6 even says Let everything that has breath praise the LORD. Praise the LORD. And Isaiah 43:18-21 certainly applies as we stand for the restoration of our marriages; confirming that God created us for His praise, and even that He wants us to LOOK for reasons to praise Him, because it says “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. The wild animals honor me, the jackals and the owls, because I provide water in the desert and streams in the wasteland, to give drink to my people, my chosen, the people I formed for myself that they may proclaim my praise. And Ephesians 1:11-12 says In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. Therefore God is not pleased with us when we don’t praise Him and give Him the honor and glory He deserves, thus NOT fulfilling the purpose for which we were created. And we see a powerful illustration of that in Jeremiah 13:10-14, which says These wicked people, who refuse to listen to my words, who follow the stubbornness of their hearts and go after other gods to serve and worship them, will be like this belt—completely useless! For as a belt is bound around a man’s waist, so I bound the whole house of Israel and the whole house of Judah to me,’ declares the LORD, ‘to be my people for my renown and praise and honor. But they have not listened.’ “Say to them: ‘This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: Every wineskin should be filled with wine.’ And if they say to you, ‘Don’t we know that every wineskin should be filled with wine?’ then tell them, ‘This is what the LORD says: I am going to fill with drunkenness all who live in this land, including the kings who sit on David’s throne, the priests, the prophets and all those living in Jerusalem. I will smash them one against the other, fathers and sons alike, declares the LORD. I will allow no pity or mercy or compassion to keep me from destroying them.’ “ If that doesn’t get our attention and make us understand how serious God is about getting the praise from us that He deserves, I can’t imagine what will! GOD IS VERY SERIOUS ABOUT PRAISE! I know I have offended people in the past because I’m such a stickler for publicly giving God praise for everything He does for us and for refusing to allow grumbling and complaining, but that’s because I get it, and I know and understand the power praising God releases into our lives, especially as we stand for the restoration of our marriages. One of the most amazing stories in the Bible demonstrating the victorious power of praise is found in 2 Chronicles 20, where verse 22 says As they began to sing and praise, the LORD set ambushes against the men of Ammon and Moab and Mount Seir who were invading Judah, and they were defeated. So I encourage everyone to read and study it, because it’s particularly encouraging to us when we face all the forces coming against us as we stand for our marriages, whether from earthly or spiritual realms.

Yesterday was a particularly rewarding day for me personally, because I saw that at least two of the FAM Fellowship members were beginning to really understand the importance of giving God praise, honor and glory for EVERYTHING He does for us, and I talked to two (and heard of another) women who actually realized that the Lord HAD to bring trouble to their marriages to make them realize how bad things were and give them an opportunity to make the changes necessary to make their marriages what God always wanted and intended them to be. The following messages were posted on the ladies’ private site yesterday morning, for which I appreciate Janet and Sharon’s permission to share here, as well as some of the responses from other members. (Note: SNO = spouse name omitted)

Upon reflection, I had to confess that there were so many things that I should have been thanking God for, but wasn’t, and so I have made a resolve to praise and thank him for everything he is doing in my life. For the past few weeks my husband has really pulled back and has been very distant. I have not seen or heard from him for a couple of weeks. Yesterday I was not feeling well; it seems I was coming down with the flu, and I was really feeling rotten at work. And then out of the blue, my phone rang and it was SNO on the phone calling to say hi. He wasn’t talking about anything significant; he just wanted to see how I was doing. As soon as I hung up, I said thank you Lord. Though this may seem like something small and insignificant, I had to thank my Lord as I know there are many who have not heard from their spouses in years. God is so faithful. He gives us small blessings to see if we can be trusted with the really big blessings He has in store for us. Praise be to God!!

Response by Robin on May 24th, 2007 at 9:25 am
Janet, this is really wonderful! I have found that the times of silence from my husband are the times to really trust God, to stand on His word, wield my sword, and hold up my shield. And most of the time, after I put my total trust in the savior, SNO calls or comes around. But in the process, I do as you do and thank God for the great things that He is doing in me and for me.

Response by Alex on May 24th, 2007 at 9:33 am
Janet, I’m glad you got that phone call and you should expect more, because when we’re faithful to bring God glory through praise and when we’re grateful with what we have, as you are-God’s gonna bless that!! Hugs, Alex

Response by Linda Wattu on May 24th, 2007 at 9:36 am
RIGHT ON, Janet! You know I’ve been waiting to see this – I’ve sort of been hounding her about it! And I promise you, you WILL see things change, because the Lord had been giving you some awesome praises and you were hiding them away in your heart instead of giving Him the glory for all to see! And God WILL NOT be denied His glory. So make note of this day, because I predict that you will be able to look back on it as a turning point in the restoration of your marriage – now God will go to work on SNO’s heart – so watch out!

Dear Lord, I thank you for bringing Janet to the understanding of how serious you are about getting the praise, honor and glory for EVERYTHING you do in our lives and that when we show ourselves unworthy and unreliable to praise you in the small things, there’s no reason for you to expect us to do any better if you give us the BIG blessings and praises. There’s no use giving us a powerful testimony for your glory when you know it won’t be used that way – because we are really more focused on our own needs and pleasure! And, Lord, Janet is by NO MEANS the only one in this fellowship who needed that same understanding, so I pray that through the power of your Holy Spirit you will bring that same revelation to the hearts of every FAM Fellowship member, because I so want every one of them to see your power and glory fully manifested in their lives and in the restoration of their marriages and families! You are so awesome and so worthy to be praised and we need to praise you over and over again for the many wonderful blessings you pour out into our lives EVERY day! We are a blessed people and it’s time we recognize just how blessed we are and use the power of our testimonies to stop the devil DEAD IN HIS TRACKS! Your Word tells us very plainly that the WORD OF OUR TESTIMONY has the power to defeat the devil and to hurl him down, so we have no one but ourselves to blame when he continues to steal, kill and destroy everything precious and dear in our lives! It’s time to stand up to him with the weapons of warfare you have so graciously provided; and praising your Holy name and the works of your mighty hand is certainly a powerful one! We love and adore you, Sweet Jesus, and we do give you ALL PRAISE, HONOR AND GLORY, as we thank you and ask these things in your most powerful name! Amen.

Response by Maria on May 24th, 2007 at 11:03 am
Janet, it’s so wonderful that when you felt the most rotten and miserable there was that wonderful call to cheer you up. God is good all the time and we give Him praise and glory for stepping in when most needed. We praise you Lord and give you all the glory, always.

Response by Thursa on May 24th, 2007 at 11:13 am
Praise God Janet!!! This is wonderful and VERY significant that you shared it! God has told us to show Him glory and praise Him during all times. So we must be obedient so that He can just shower all sorts of blessings on us! And when we do start looking for God in EVERYTHING, I’m telling you, we are so very blessed that it is AMAZING!!! God is AMAZING!!!

Thanks again for sharing the wonderful blessing God gave you, and start looking for more because they are coming!!!!

Response by Kathy in Oregon on May 24th, 2007 at 1:22 pm
Janet, be blessed and encouraged because God orchestrated that call from SNO! He is in control of all things and He loves you and cares for you and knew just when to send that call so that you would be uplifted and encouraged. God is so amazing and when we look for Him and seek Him in all things, we can’t help but find Him! I just thank and praise God for all that He is doing in your and SNO’s lives and marriage! Love, Kathy

Response by Diane on May 24th, 2007 at 4:20 pm
Yes, Praise the Lord, Janet, and keep praising. Nothing is SMALL. Everything God does in our lives has a plan and a purpose, so keep thanking Him and sharing. I believe the sharing is VERY important. This is all for Gods glory and we get the Victory. Be encouraged and blessed. Diane

As I read through the daily praise reports, it makes me reflect on my situation and how blessed I am at this moment. My husband is still in the home, and we do talk daily about current events, the children, etc… We will even occasionally watch a movie or a TV show together and laugh about it. I must thank God that he is still a part of my and our children’s daily lives. Although last Friday was very unpleasant for us (I said some things that I should not have said that really irritated him and caused him to leave his home and write me a very nasty email), we all went to see Shrek 3 last Saturday, did some shopping afterward, and went to dinner. It was a great day for all of us. On Monday morning, SNO and I went to our son’s awards ceremony at school, where my son received several awards, and both SNO and I were very proud of him.

I must give all praises to God to put it on SNO’s heart to stay home; even though he has verbalized several times that it is over between us. I have learned so much from all of you, and these praise reports and testimonies are so uplifting and give me hope.

Response by Thursa on May 24th, 2007 at 11:18 am
Sharon, thanks so much for sharing your praise report. It was very wonderful to hear! God will bless you more and more as you show your obedience in sharing your praises! And with the verse Linda often shares from Revelation, it IS our testimony that helps manifest Satan’s defeat. So send Satan running and shout from all the rooftops the WONDERFUL things God has done!!!

Response by Alex on May 24th, 2007 at 12:12 pm
Sharon, you’re right. God built us to praise him and as we learn how to do it and we rejoice in giving that praise, we find that many things change inwardly and outwardly. I agree that you have reason to praise him and I know God will give you more and more opportunities to do so, including the full and complete restoration of your marriage! Hugs, Alex

Response by Linda Wattu on May 24th, 2007 at 1:11 pm
Sharon, after our last conversation, you know this does my heart good! What an awesome praise report about the power and glory of Jesus Christ! Honey, NEVER forget this incident and how the Lord turned around what looked SO hopeless – and in just a matter of hours at that! I told you I haven’t seen anything manifest the power of God so quickly and completely as humility, and this certainly proves that! Now, you know I want to know what happened when you got home, so you’ll have to call with an update! God is working that change we talked about in you, Sharon, and SNO WILL find it totally captivating and irresistible, so just keep your eyes firmly focused on God and He will work out the rest. And your testimony will be very encouraging for others who think they’ve totally blown it too, because it proves that God can and will turn around even our biggest mess ups! Thanks so much for sharing this and blessing us so with this wonderful praise report! Who but God could have done something so totally awesome!

Dear Lord, we so thank you for the miraculous work of restoration you are doing in Sharon and SNO’s marriage. And we thank you for the change you are working in Sharon’s heart and mind, Lord, as she learns a totally new way of doing things, which we know you are ALWAYS SO FAITHFUL to bless and reward! Thank you for softening SNO’s heart and giving him the ability to forgive his wife. I know he loves her, Lord, and he will be the happiest of men as he witnesses the transformation you are making in her before his very eyes. Let him see your love and goodness in her, Lord, and be drawn into right relationship with you, so that when this family is fully restored, you will be at the center of all they do! We love you, Lord, and we praise your Holy name as we give thanks and praise you. We ask all this in your name, Jesus. Amen.

Response by Robin on May 24th, 2007 at 2:57 pm
Hi Sharon and Welcome to our family!!!! The word say in Revelation 12:11 that we overcome the enemy by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony. It is so easy to look upon our conditions and circumstances and complain!! But it’s greater and more rewarding when we look to the Author and Finisher of our faith, Jesus Christ, and remember that all things are possible through Him! Our God is an AWESOME GOD!!!!! P.S. When you get a chance read Philippians 4

Response by Diane on May 24th, 2007 at 4:27 pm
Hello, Sharon, and you are so right that you should share all praises. It is great that your husband is still home, so just keep praying and praising. Even when we think we have messed up, God will turn it for good. Just ask for forgiveness and God is faithful to wipe the slate clean. Keep being thankful to Our Mighty One and He will soften your husband’s heart. We have witnessed so many great God things and He wants to do this all for you and your family. Just keep reading and loving God, and He will make the pieces all fit together. Be encouraged and share all the blessings God gives and He will keep on giving. Satan doesn’t like it when we share for God’s glory, so keep sharing and put the devil on the run. Diane

Yes, we serve a great and mighty God who is ALWAYS blessing us in so many ways, but He does command and expect us to praise Him and give Him all the glory He deserves. I’m reminded of when I was trying to convince another one of our members to share her praises on the private website, which she does now, and she told me she was writing it all down in her journal. So I asked her just how much glory she thought God gets out of that; not one bit! Luke 8:16 even says “No one lights a lamp and hides it in a jar or puts it under a bed. Instead, he puts it on a stand, so that those who come in can see the light. And 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 says Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. And there’s no doubt that encouragement is one of the greatest comforts possible when we’re down and out and discouraged, or that the words of our praise reports and testimonies bring encouragement, hope and comfort to others who are suffering in similar circumstances. So the following verses are just a few to consider as we strive to understand what the Lord teaches us about praising Him for EVERYTHING and that we’re to continually do so. And the more we make praise our habit, the more blessed and encouraged we’ll be, because the Lord WILL bless and reward us by giving us even more to praise Him for, which is confirmed in The Parable of the Talents.

Psalm 100:4-5
Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

Isaiah 63:7
I will tell of the kindnesses of the LORD, the deeds for which he is to be praised, according to all the LORD has done for us— yes, the many good things he has done for the house of Israel, according to his compassion and many kindnesses.

Jeremiah 33:9
Then this city will bring me renown, joy, praise and honor before all nations on earth that hear of all the good things I do for it; and they will be in awe and will tremble at the abundant prosperity and peace I provide for it.’

1 Peter 4:11
If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.

Psalm 150:1-2
Praise the LORD. Praise God in his sanctuary; praise him in his mighty heavens. Praise him for his acts of power; praise him for his surpassing greatness.

Romans 15:11
And again, “Praise the Lord, all you Gentiles, and sing praises to him, all you peoples.”

Psalm 34:1-3
I will extol the LORD at all times; his praise will always be on my lips. My soul will boast in the LORD; let the afflicted hear and rejoice. Glorify the LORD with me; let us exalt his name together.

Psalm 71:14-15
But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more. My mouth will tell of your righteousness, of your salvation all day long, though I know not its measure.

It really is difficult to put into words the total awe and amazement all of us in the FAM Fellowship have experienced as we continue to see the Lord’s hand at work in our midst, so I was really caught off guard yesterday when one of our members felt led to post a message warning against discouragement! Naturally, messages against discouragement are always timely and helpful, but I couldn’t believe part of the post that said With so many wonderful miracles and blessings happening in the ministry, it is so easy for others to get discouraged. So many of us have prayed and fasted for countless days, and in the physical it seems as if nothing is happening. So we start wondering why the God we serve is so silent, and we start wondering why are we being kept in the valley, when others seem to be climbing to the mountain top. It is in times like these that the sin of doubt starts creeping into our lives; and we start wondering if restoration will ever come to our marriages. But we must recognize that this is the scheme of the devil, and we must realize that the God we serve is more powerful than the devil or anyone else. As Doreen says, “God’s Word is full of promises and ALL of them are payable upon demand according to the conditions named.”

It really was inconceivable to me that ANYONE in our midst wouldn’t fully rejoice with all that we see going on, and I felt righteous anger rise up in me at the thought that seeing miracles manifesting before our very eyes could cause anyone to be discouraged, especially since we had to address that recently when another marriage was restored a few months ago. Yet, I realized that if this was something someone felt the need to address, it was obviously still a problem to be dealt with, and I’ve been totally amazed to see how strongly and completely the Lord has confirmed that just since yesterday, which is primarily what I want to share in this post (making it quite long), beginning with the response I posted yesterday as follows:

“As I read this, I couldn’t help feeling sad at the thought that anyone would be discouraged by the awesome praise reports and miracles we’re seeing in the lives of our members, because God assures us that what He does for one, He WILL do for all. So there is no reason to be discouraged. In fact, there’s a whole lot more reason to be encouraged, and we all need to see what we can learn from those among us who are experiencing the breakthroughs we all long for. And as I’ve stated many times before, it is by no means just a coincidence that the ones we see the Lord blessing so much are the same ones who NEVER miss an opportunity to give the Lord praise for ANYTHING, or to consistently ENCOURAGE others with their words and prayers. Jesus made it very clear in several parables that if we can’t be trusted with little; He isn’t going to give us more. In fact, He even taught that the little we had would be taken from us if we didn’t use it for the glory of God and the furtherance of His kingdom. And feeling discouraged indicates some of the negative emotions I hoped were exorcised when some of our members acknowledged being unable to fully and completely rejoice when Rosalie’s marriage was restored.

And while it is so true that we have to trust and believe the Lord will do exactly what He says He will do, as yesterday’s SOF post said, our faith has to go beyond simple belief, because we have to have CONFIDENCE that God CAN and WILL restore our marriages…simply because He hates divorce and for the glory of His beloved Son, Jesus Christ! When we really have confidence in that, and see others realizing their hearts desire, we will recognize that as PROOF that God DOES keep His Word, and we won’t be discouraged, because we’ll be extremely encouraged by the hope and expectation that we might be next! And there’s something VERY important to remember about the quote from Pastor Doreen, in which she said “God’s Word is full of promises and ALL of them are payable upon demand according to the conditions named.” And that’s “according to the conditions named! So when we don’t feel that God is delivering on His promises, instead of doubting God, we need to examine ourselves, because the problem is not God, or His unwillingness or inability to give us the desires of our hearts. More than likely, the problem is with us. It could be a matter of something in our hearts that is displeasing to God, which prevents Him from answering our prayers; such as unforgiveness, bitterness, malice, jealousy, pride, self-righteousness, and a long list of other things. It might be a matter of our failure to DO what His Word teaches us to do. It might be our failure to acknowledge Him in ALL our ways, or a failure to love Him with ALL of our hearts, minds, souls and strength. It could be our failure to love others as we love ourselves, or failure to serve and minister to others. It could be a matter of NOT seeking first HIS kingdom and His righteousness, and asking with wrong motives, seeking our own pleasure over the glory of God. And it could even be our own failure to give God the praise, honor and glory for the things He does for us every day, because we have NOT demonstrated our trustworthiness to use the powerful testimonies we seek. Ephesians 1 makes it VERY clear that God does EVERYTHING for the glory of Jesus Christ, and when He blesses us by the power of His hand and we don’t give Him the glory for that, we clearly can NOT be trusted to glorify Him with more, so we shouldn’t expect more, and we should beware that He might well even take those little blessings and breakthroughs from us, as we see in The Parable of the Talents, in Matthew 25:14-30 )passage omitted).

So I’d encourage anyone feeling in any way discouraged by the awesome work we’ve seen the lord doing in our midst to pray Psalm 139:23-24, which says Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. The Lord really dealt with me concerning that a couple of years ago, and when I started praying that prayer, I didn’t like the results, because the Lord was ever so faithful to reveal a LOT of yuk still left in me. But the END result led to a much closer walk with Him and a much more victorious life in Christ! And that’s really what we all seek, and there’s no good reason NOT to humble ourselves under the mighty hand of God and ask Him to reveal anything in our own lives that might be displeasing or offensive to Him. And when we do, we will truly be blessed and encouraged, because God will be faithful to lift us up in due time!”

While I was writing the above response, Diane called to share the news of her restoration, which was the best possible antidote against any form of discouragement taking root in our midst, as evidenced by yesterday’s SOF post! And Diane followed up my response to the post about discouragement as follows, along with some of the responses by other members:

Response by Diane on May 22nd, 2007 at 3:19 pm
We should never be discouraged, because God says we are to rejoice with others and cry with others. Let us all remember this is about Gods glory and He gets no glory for divorce and broken families. He is working this all out for all of us, and it will be done in His perfect timing and in His perfect way. I used to think a “suddenly” would be great, but God had a better plan. If I got a suddenly a while back, I wouldn’t have been ready and God knew it. He has been giving me my husband’s heart back a little at a time and now I know that I am ready for my marriage and to be the wife God intended me to be. When we are not ready, God knows and He refines and molds us to get us ready. That is why we need to listen to His words and be obedient. I see that our family needed time to adjust to my husband being around too. God truly does know what He is doing and He will make the pieces fit perfectly. Stay encouraged everyone, and praise, praise and praise; and give God all the glory He deserves. Remember, even cleaning up after our spouses is a praise; and every phone call, even if nothing good seems to be said; God is working, and hearts are softening. So I suggest we all write a list of all that God has done in our lives and give HIM praise. We may be surprised to see the things we forgot HE has done for us. Thank you, Lord, for all the mountains You are moving in the lives of this fellowship family! We think you are awesome! Our God is in control of it all! Be blessed Diane

Response by Diane on May 22nd, 2007 at 3:45 pm
Something the Lord just placed on my heart when I was done posting, was that we seem to keep going around the same mountain when we complain and grumble about circumstances in our lives. When I found myself being discouraged, I looked at what I was doing differently. And I found that as soon as I looked at circumstances, instead of Jesus and all He has done for me, Satan got an opening to come through to poke me. Having faith means faith in the unseen. We don’t know what God is busy doing in our spouses’ lives, and through the fire, we are being refined. God needs to work on US first, and when I look at myself now, I am nothing like I was and that is all Jesus. That is what God needs to do; change us and get us ready to be the spouses He intended us to be. We all want a great marriage, and not just what we had before, but all that God intended marriage to be. So we have to stay encouraged and keep our eyes off circumstances and on Jesus. It is God’s will that will be done, and we all know that it is God’s will for restoration. Be blessed and encouraged, Diane

Response by Thursa on May 22nd, 2007 at 3:51 pm
AMEN!!!! I was always told to “look for the positive in everything.” And I have refined that for myself the last year and truly do “look for GOD in everything!” God is SOOO awesome. When you stand back and just really look at all He does for us, it is just…AWESOME!!! Dan did a great job of giving us all a wonderful example of how to just take a situation and see how much GOD is there! We should all do that, every chance we can! And when we say our prayers at the end of the day, we should just think about and acknowledge ALL of the things God has given us and PRAISE HIM! HE LISTENS and He will bless us with more and more. The parable of the talents is His EXACT instructions on how and why to do this!!! Don’t be afraid to post anything at all! Don’t bury your praise in the soil and not let it GROW!!! Our purpose is for God’s glory and when we are praising Him and letting His glory shine through us, He is pleased!!!

I AM encouraged and I thank you all for never letting me forget to keep looking for God in ALL things!!!

Response by Linda Wattu on May 22nd, 2007 at 4:14 pm
Thursa, thanks again! You put it best and in perfectly simple words…LOOK FOR GOD IN EVERYTHING!!! Because when we are looking for God, ALL we can see is GOOD!!! Way to go, Girl!

Then I was totally blown away early this morning when I read Marsha Burns’ Small Straws message, because it says:
May 23, 2007: Beloved Bride, I have admonished you to give thanks and rejoice to prepare the way for a continued flow of blessings. And, I have heard the first smattering of your obedience. Yet, there are still many who have not taken My word seriously and have even continued to complain and grumble. Your choice in this matter will take you on one of two paths. The path of obedience leads to being blessed, and the path of disobedience leads to being cursed. Choose wisely.
Deuteronomy 30:19 “I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live.”
She certainly managed to make the point a lot more forcefully with a lot fewer words!

Then today, Thursa shared the following message on the private site, which was also perfectly timed to address the issue of discouragement. So here’s her message and my response:

I received this as an email from a friend, and it’s a great illustration that’s applicable to us all as we see things happening differently among our members. So I thought I’d share it!

“One day, I decided to quit. I wanted to quit my job to quit my relationships, to quit my spirituality; I even wanted to quit my life. I went to the woods to have one last talk with God.

“God”, I said, “Can you give me one good reason not to quit?” His
answer surprised me.

“Look around”, He said, “Do you see the fern and the bamboo?”

“Yes”, I replied.

“When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds, I took very good care of them. I gave them light. I gave them water. The fern quickly grew from the earth. Its brilliant green covered the floor. Yet nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo.”

“In the second year the fern grew more vibrant and plentiful. And
again, nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo.”

“In the third year there was still nothing from the bamboo seed. But I would not quit.”

“In the fourth year, again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed.
Still, I would not quit.”

“Then in the fifth year a tiny sprout emerged from the earth. Compared to the fern it was seemingly small and insignificant. But just 6 months later the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall. It had spent the five years
growing roots. Those roots made it strong and gave it what it needed to survive. I would not give any of my creations a challenge they could not handle,” He said to me.

“Did you know, my child, that all this time you have been struggling, you have actually been growing roots? I would not quit on the bamboo and I will never quit on you! Don’t compare yourself to others. The bamboo had a different purpose than the fern.
Yet they both make the forest beautiful. Your time will come,”
God said to me. “You will rise high.”

“How high should I rise?” I asked.

“How high will the bamboo rise?” He asked in return.

“As high as it can?” I questioned.

“Yes”, He said, “Give Me glory by rising as high as you can. And remember…I will never leave you, nor forsake you. I will never give up on you. I will never, ever quit on you.”

Everyone has days when they want to “quit”. When there are
struggles…obstacles in life, remember we’re just growing roots!!
God has a purpose in mind for each one of us and we need to talk to Him and let Him help us realize that purpose.

Always remember, He’ll never leave us, He’ll never forsake us, and
He’ll never quit on us.

Response by Linda Wattu on May 23rd, 2007 at 11:25 am
Thursa, thanks for sharing this awesome message! It goes along perfectly with today’s SOF post too, which is about discouragement! We certainly can NOT afford to allow discouragement or grumbling and complaining to take root in our midst, because it would definitely hinder the powerful flow of the Holy Spirit we’ve witnessed in the past month or so, and I know NONE of us will stand for that! So let’s all stay focused on being rooted in the Word of God and discard everything else, so we can experience the promise of Psalm 1:2-3, which says Butt his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers. And it is by no means a coincidence that today’s message from Marsha Burns also confirms the SOF post message I already had planned for today! And these are words we all had better take heed to, and realize the importance of, because if anyone in our midst proves them, it is Diane! (Small Straws message omitted)

And then, pulling it all together as she so often does, Alex posted the following Heart To Heart message on the ladies’ private website today too:

“Faith is vital to our stand, it is what deflects the fiery darts of discouragement. In the past, I suffered unnecessarily because I was frequently trapped under spirits of condemnation and legalistic thinking. It was so easy to believe that if I had gotten in the flesh, I had somehow “undone” all of the work that God was doing for my marriage. (Pride was at work there too, as you can see by my thinking.) But Hebrews 2:2 says, “for if the message spoken by angels (the Mosiac law) was binding and every violation and disobedience received its just punishment, how shall we escape if we ignore such a great salvation?” We think of salvation as just the saving of our souls, but it is much more. Salvation is described as the act of rescuing; the act of preserving from destruction. God does so much more for us on this earth than just save our souls. One of the best ways to resist the devil is to understand how God sees us, which is described in the same chapter in verses 14-16, “Since the children have flesh and blood, Christ too shared in their humanity so that by his death, he might DESTROY him who holds the power over death, that is the devil, and free those who all their lives were held in slavery for their fear…” Discouragement has its roots in fear. And fear takes hold when we are not bringing our thoughts captive and making them obedient to Christ and the Word. Fear takes hold when we believe anything or anyone other than God. We’re all familiar with the verse, “Perfect love casts out fear.” (1 John 4:18) And when we gain knowledge of the character and promises of God, as found in his Word, then knowledge of His perfect love really does cast out fear. Throughout both the Old and New Testaments, God addresses the issue of fear again and again. Why? Because he knows that fear is the opposite of faith and that we need faith to gain the promise, just as Abraham did. Hebrews 3 tells us to “fix your thoughts on Jesus…” When we feed our fear by looking at our circumstances rather than on God, anger finds a foothold. It is so important then that we guard ourselves so that we do not develop unbelieving hearts that turn away from God. Hebrews 3:13 charges us to “encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.” That’s what’s so wonderful about sharing our praise reports, our personal journeys and our restoration testimonies in this fellowship. In doing so, we “hold on to our courage and the hope of which we boast.” (Hebrews 3:6) Diane’s testimony is not just for her; it’s for everyone in this fellowship. Let’s allow ourselves to see her testimony as God speaking to us, and affirming his will and desire to do the exact same thing for us. It is His voice that speaks through her testimony, and Hebrews 3:15 tells us, “Today, if you hear his voice do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion.”

As I was reading Hebrews, God showed me very clearly that my marriage could have been restored two years after I became a stander. Scott and I had our “suddenly”, but it frightened us. Instead of trusting God, we believed Satan’s lie that it was too good to be true. As a result, I delayed my own restoration by another four years. Chapter 3 of Hebrews goes on to describe what happened to those Israelites who, when the Promised Land was spied out, refused to believe that they could enter. And they didn’t enter. Even if you’ve gone around the mountain of marriage restoration many times, you still have hope. “Therefore since the promise of entering his rest still stands, let us be careful that none have been found to have fallen short of it. For we have had the gospel preached to us, just as they did; but the message they heard was of no value to them because they did not combine it with faith.” It also says “Therefore God set again a certain day, calling it today…” (Hebrews 4:1-3) Every day can be our “Today”.

Father, fill each one of us with the faith needed to inherit your promises. Reveal yourself to us so that our knowledge of you will not be lacking. Bless us by allowing us to see ourselves and each other as you see us, made righteous by your grace through Christ’s work of atonement. Restore our confidence in your plans for each of us and let the praises shared here bring health and hope and encouragement to all here. Let us approach your throne of grace with confidence so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

And IF anyone is still struggling with doubt, discouragement or fear, just listen to Joyce Meyer’s TV broadcast messages from yesterday and today about Confidence and Getting out of the Boat, and you’re bound to be blessed and ENCOURAGED, especially if you’ll just REFUSE to entertain doubt, discouragement and fear!

God just continues to bless FAM Fellowship members in ways so far above and beyond anything we could ever ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20), and this day certainly was no exception. IN JUST THIS ONE DAY, one wife shared that she had been praying for more “chatty” conversations with her husband and that he actually called her on her cell phone about THIRTY times today for just such conversation; one husband shared that he has a date with his wife, who for the first time suggested that they get together for dinner Friday night, which will be the second time in a week, after being separated for over a year with little more than “necessary” contact with each other; one wife shared that her husband invited her to go along with him and their daughter to a movie (she also shared that she had recently started tithing again and just found out that her tax refund is going to be twice what she had been previously told); and a wife who expected to have her name taken off the deed to their home last night when they closed on the loan to transfer it to her husband’s name only (as part of their settlement agreement), shared that he had changed his mind and her name is staying on the deed! And then we were indeed blessed by the following Restored Marriage Testimony posted on the ladies private website today! Thank you, Diane, for your permission to share your wonderful news and some of the responses from other FAM members, which we do for the glory of our Lord and Savior, because there’s no way to see what God has done in your marriage and family without being very blessed and encouraged!

“If I give my notice, can I sleep on the couch?” I love our God; HE is so awesome! That is what my husband asked this morning as he left our house for the airport. I thank God for the restoration of our marriage and our family! Yes, Linda, I am finally able to say move me to the restored column; (Spouse name omitted = SNO) has asked to come HOME. Thank you God! I am speachless this morning, as I have prayed and hoped for this for so long and God is faithful and HE is a miracle working God. SNO has been feeling more and more comfortable in our home for the past month and he has asked to come home. I would prefer that it not be to the couch, but hey, it is in our home, and I am believing that it will not be long before he moves upstairs. I am so thankful to the ONE who has done this! God is so great! I am learning a new way to live with my husband.

I believe praising God for all the things HE does in our lives and others, is the reason He has given this BIG Gift to me. So keep praising and praying people. God wants to give us all these blessings and He WILL.

This past weekend was so full of answered prayers that I am still in awe. Some of them were new things I prayed for and some were longer in coming. So never give up and think that God won’t answer; sometimes HE is just working on the pieces of our puzzle so they come together perfectly.

We still have a lot of work to do, but I am trusting God to complete this work in us and praying for the salvation of my husband. His heart is home and soon his physical body will be too.I did what Dan did with Amy’s post and looked at all the things God has done for my family in the past few months and it is mind boggling. Everyone should sit down and write out all the things they see God’s hand in and thank HIM; even for the small stuff; nothing is too small or big to thank HIM for. Be encouraged everyone; what God has done for us, HE will do for everyone! Just keep believing and praising, and know that HE IS GOD and nothing is too hard for HIM. Remember how my marriage looked dead not so long ago, and now God has created beauty for ashes, and HE wants to do even more for you all. ASK and You shall receive; seek and you shall find; and keep knocking. All I can say is be encouraged, because our God is AWESOME and He loves us and our spouses.Please keep us in your prayers, because I need to learn to live with my spouse again. Thank you, God, for this family and I love you all. Diane

Response by Christy on May 22nd, 2007 at 12:22 pm
I have tears of happiness for you. I am speechless. I think this is awesome! Yes, I will pray that you learn to live with your spouse again, as you worded it, but I think it will come easier than you think. This is two restored marriages I’ve seen since I joined FAM about a month and a half ago. I am so glad to be a witness to this (both restorations). Keep sharing. I still have no idea what to say except that this is so COOL! Praise the Lord!

Response by Suzanne on May 22nd, 2007 at 12:59 pm
Diane:
AWESOME!!!!!!!!! I’m praising God with you! It’s just a matter of time before we will all be on that ‘restored’ list! Many blessings to you and your family!

Response by Robin on May 22nd, 2007 at 2:15 pm
Diane, you have brought tears to my eyes. GOD is ABLE!!!!! I know that in Christ ALL things are possible. I am declaring that I am next!!!! Diane, I explained to Linda how satan really tried to discourage my mind this weekend, but thank God for His word and this site. You have encouraged me to no end. And now this, wow!!!! This is such a confirmation for me to continue to stand and stand strong!!!! Love, Robin

Response by Janet in Virginia on May 22nd, 2007 at 2:53 pm
The first word out of my mouth was AWESOME!!!! I’m so happy for you, Diane. Your restoration will give us hope to keep standing for our spouses.

Response by Janet in Maryland on May 22nd, 2007 at 3:05 pm
Diane, hallelujah!!! Our God is an awesome God, He reigns from heaven above!!! I am dancing in my office for you!! Diane, I would not even worry about SNO saying all this stuff about being on the couch. It was just this past weekend that he could not even stand being in your son’s room alone for one night. I remembered him asking you to come over and stay with him. What in the world would make you believe that he will be staying on the couch for even a minute? Girl, our God did not bring SNO home to sleep on the couch. His Word says he makes all things new. You just prepare the honeymoon suite. We have a new bride and groom coming in!!

Dear Heavenly Father we just THANK YOU for the awesome work you have done in SNO and Diane’s marriage. We thank you for the patience and perseverance that you have instilled in Diane. Lord we thank you for softening SNO’s heart and turning him back to the wife of his youth. Lord, we ask that you continue to bless this wonderful couple. Equip them with love, patience, perseverance, goodness, kindness and forgiveness as they start their new lives together. Help them to remain grounded with you at the head of their relationship. Lord, we give you all the honor, glory and praise. You are truly an awesome God. Amen

Response by Thursa on May 22nd, 2007 at 3:28 pm
PRAISE GOD!!! Woohoo, Diane, this is WONDERFUL!!! I did a little jig in my cubicle for you too. Then I did another one for GOD!!! He is just totally awesome and He has restored your marriage, just as He promised! God is so faithful and true, and as His obedient servant, you have given us all encouragement daily. It will not be long at all before God possibly puts needles in that couch to prompt SNO back into your honeymoon suite =))

Dear Heavenly Father, we praise and worship Your totally awesome work. You have faithfully restored Diane and SNO’s marriage and continue to grow and build their testimony for Your glory! Thank you so much for Your promises and Your word to guide us. We pray you would continue to guide both of them into a complete loving married couple built solidly on YOUR rock! You are awesome, Lord, and we pray Your Holy Glory would shine so brightly in all of our lives! In Jesus’ Precious Name, Amen.

Response by Linda Wattu on May 22nd, 2007 at 3:44 pm
Diane, you know how thrilled I am! What an AWESOME and FAITHFUL God we serve! There are no words to express the joy and happiness I feel for you! What a journey it has been! And to think that you weren’t even saved when SNO left! God has really done many miracles in your restoration process, and the BIG one yet remains, and that’s SNO’s salvation. But God didn’t bring you this far without that one coming too! And he is truly a fortunate man to have such a strong woman of faith standing in the gap for him, and his love and appreciation for you will only grow and intensify with each passing day! Yes, Honey, he sees you through totally new eyes, and they are indeed the eyes of love – a love that God put there, where once there was a totally hardened heart! Let NONE of us ever forget that! Our God IS able, indeed! And He WILL do exactly what every Word of the Bible tells us He will do and the only thing that can truly keep it from happening is if we fail to believe it! I look forward to seeing the Lord continue His wonderful work in your marriage and in your family. And what a blessed wedding present for your daughter! Just keep in mind that this is when the REALL hard work begins, but the Lord has and will continue to equip you for every step. Just keep your eyes on Him and don’t let your heart harden due to disappointments or failures on SNO’s part. You are so wise to understand that you do have to learn to live with your husband again, because you are a totally different woman and you will have to get to know each other all over again…but oh what delightful fun that will be!

Dearest Lord Jesus, we stand in total awe and amazement as we consider the wonder of your Hand at work in the restoration of this marriage and family! And we give you ALL praise, honor and glory for this GREAT and MIGHTY thing you have done! Lord, we praise you and thank you as we ask for your work to continue in SNO and Diane’s lives. We pray for SNO’s salvation, Lord, which we know is your will. And we thank you that the fear that holds him back will disappear and that he will find a new self confidence and have the assurance that he is exactly where he belongs! Thank you for the new thing you have created of this marriage and that SNO and Diane will experience every joy and blessing you created marriage to be and that you will withhold no good thing from them. Let the power of their awesome testimony be used for your glory in ways we can’t even imagine. And, Lord, give Diane the grace, wisdom and strength she needs as she makes the adjustment to havingher husband back home. They literally have to get to know each other again and I pray that just as your Word tells us, by seeing his wife’s quiet and gentle spirit, SNO will be won to you; that he will see your love and goodness in his wife and desire to have what she has. We pray for blessings in their home, Lord, and that you will be at the center of all they do. You are so awesome and so worthy to be praised! We pray these things in the most awesome and glorious name of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ! Amen.

Response by Kathy in Oregon on May 22nd, 2007 at 3:53 pm
Oh, Diane, how great our Lord is! I just praise and thank God for ALL He has done in you, SNO, and your family! There simply are no words that can adequately express the joy and hope I feel for you and SNO and your children, other than “Praise God, for His love, mercy and grace that endure forever!!” May His light shine in and through you all the days of your life! What an awesome and mighty testimony to what the Lord is so willing and able to do in all our lives! Keep the faith always! Love, Kathy

Response by Diane on May 22nd, 2007 at 3:53 pm
Amen, Robin, call things as though they are! I pray that yours is next, followed by a flood of restorations. Our God is able and He loves our spouses and marriages.

Response by Sharon on May 22nd, 2007 at 4:04 pm
Diane,
We thank God for this restoration, and a I thank you for this praise report. I am in awe of the wonderful works God has done in your life, and will do in the lives of all of us who are standing. “O Give Thanks unto the Lord, for He is good, for his mercy endures forever. To him who alone does great wonders, for his mercy endures forever.”

Response by Alex on May 22nd, 2007 at 5:52 pm
Oh, so cool!! This was such wonderful news though not at all surprising!! Go God!!!!! I have no words, so that’s all I’ll say…GO GOD!!! Hugs, Alex

Response by Maria on May 22nd, 2007 at 8:37 pm
Diane, This is terrific. It’s the best news in a long, long time. I can celebrate this one for at least 7 days, like in the old days, with music, song, dance, etc. This celebration is from above, because our God is good, and I love our God, HE is so awesome! Praise the Lord and His name. I have to go to the restored column daily, just to peek and to give the devil a black eye every day by proclaiming that our Lord is going to restore and heal all our marriages. Amen!

Response by Fran on May 22nd, 2007 at 9:10 pm
Diane, I am in awe of how God has worked out everything. I’m sure it doesn’t seem so quick to you, but I’ve only been part of the group for a couple of weeks and I’ve seen things change so suddenly for you. This is great encouragement for me, and I’m sure for others. I’m praising God right with you and everyone else. When I read this earlier, I was at work, and I stopped what I was doing to go on a break, so I could praise God for what I have witnessed. I had just mentioned to one of my friends a couple of nights ago that when my husband comes home, I’ll have to learn how to live with him again. Then you mentioned that in one of your posts. That is confirmation for me.

I wouldn’t worry about SNO being on the couch; I am sure that won’t last very long. I will continue to pray for you and SNO, because the work does not end here. Fran

Response by Dan on May 22nd, 2007 at 6:09 pm
Weeee-doggies!!! Can’t write much now, but this is just awesome!! The puzzle is put together and soon will be complete and the BIG PICTURE will be hanging in the Heavenlies. Everyone continue to praise God and give Him the glory for everything that He is doing in our lives. I love the “look for God in everything,” Thursa! That is exactly what needs to be done.

Response by Paula on May 22nd, 2007 at 10:48 pm
Diane, I was unable to go on the site earlier today and happened to call Linda on my way home. She told me the awesome news and I cried so many tears of joy, joy, and joy! I’m getting teary eyed now. I’m just thanking God for his faithfulness. I am so happy- so very happy for you and SNO. This is just the beginning of something bigger and better! Your latter end shall be better than your beginning, thus saith the Lord. I loved how SNO asked- it’s so cute and innocent. Diane, I love you and your family and I will never cease to pray for you all.

Dear Lord, how great and marvelous is your name in all the earth. Lord, if we had a 10,000 tongues it would not be enough to stay thanks and to sing your praises! We thank you for being God and sovereign in our lives. You’ve keep Diane and SNO with your righteous right hand. Truly, Lord, what Satan intended for evil was meant for good and your glory. My heart, Lord, is so full of joy and praise for what you have done. Thank you for answered prayer. Keep them, Lord, all the days of their lives. Bless them with many, many more years of marital bliss – may it be for your glory and honor. I pray a hedge of protection around them to keep the enemy out in every way. Lord God, we love you! I LOVE YOU!! Diane, please keep us who remain in prayer; that we will hold fast and not throw away our confidence in the Lord. For He who promised is faithful!! Amen!

p.s. we need a picture board; I’d love to see you guys (smile)…..

Response by Diane on May 22nd, 2007 at 11:25 pm
Yeah Linda, can we have a picture board on the new site?Hey guys, I am not going anywhere and i won’t stop praying and praising God for all He is doing in all of our lives. I can’t wait to see us all moved to the restored column.

Response by Peter on May 22nd, 2007 at 11:01 pm
Dianne, this is just what this ministry is all about.
our God is just so faithful to His Word and His promises. He will never let us down.

I really loved Joyce Meyer’s TV broadcast message this morning, because she really put into easy to understand words, something that is SO important to all of us as we stand for the restoration of our marriages. How many times have we all heard (or even said ourselves) “I know I believe, but…?” Of course, the minute we say “but”, we’re in trouble, because we’ve just cancelled out what we said!

We talk so much about the importance of faith and believing in the Word of God and that He WILL do what He says He will do, but there’s no denying that we see a difference in the level of faith from one person to another. And I think Joyce’s message today explains the difference, and why we’ve seen so many awesome things happening in our midst in the past few weeks, and why I have no doubt that will continue. When we see faith in others that exudes confidence, that’s the kind of faith we want and wish we had. And there’s NO denying that the faith Jesus always sought in those around Him went beyond simply believing He was who He was and that He could and would do what He said, because the faith He wanted to see and rewarded was always faith based in confidence. And that confidence was always exhibited by some kind of action. So just believing isn’t enough; faith without confidence isn’t enough. And the following verses are just a few to give us an idea how important it is to have confidence in the things we profess to believe and have faith in is as we stand for the restoration of our marriages:

Proverbs 3:25-26
Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked, for the LORD will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being snared.

Jeremiah 17:7
“But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him.

2 Corinthians 3:3-5
You show that you are a letter from Christ, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts. Such confidence as this is ours through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.

Ephesians 3:12
In him and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence.

Hebrews 3:14
We have come to share in Christ if we hold firmly till the end the confidence we had at first.

Hebrews 4:16
Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

Hebrews 10:35
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.

Hebrews 13:6
So we say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?”

1 John 5:14-15
This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.

1 John 3:21-22
Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him.

We all need to take those last verses VERY seriously, because they say “IF our hearts do not condemn us…” Obviously, God knows and judges us by what’s in our hearts, and we can’t fool Him, especially since Matthew 12:34 warns You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. Sadly, way too many of the words spoken by standers provide more than ample evidence of condemning hearts and a lack of confidence in the Word of God, which may well explain so many unfortunate and even unnecessary delays to answered prayers. But when we demonstrate our faith and confidence in the Word of God by sharing our praise reports and testimonies about all He is doing as we expectantly await the restoration of our marriages, we are proving the power of Revelation 12:10-11, which says Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say: “Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Christ. For the accuser of our brothers, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death. One of the most important ways that works in our lives and the lives of those who hear the words of our testimonies, is that it increases and builds up the faith and confidence we have in the power and faithfulness of God to DO exactly what His Word says He will do!

So study and meditate on the above Bible verses and listen to the following message from Joyce Meyer, because the more confidence we have in God’s Word and His power and faithfulness to carry it out, the more blessed and encouraged we will be!

Seven Secrets Of A Confident Woman – Part I

Guys, even though this says it’s for women, it isn’t gender specific, so make sure you listen to it too!

Since pride is such a pervasive characteristic of our flesh nature, it’s easy to miss, especially since we’ve come up with so many words and phrases to excuse it and make it sound like a “good” thing. And even though there are many verses in the Bible that make it very clear that pride is NOT at all good and that God deals with it rather harshly, one that should really get our attention is James 4:6, which says But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Ouch! Those are some scary words, and they should cause all of us to be a lot more concerned about the need to recognize and understand pride, so we can eliminate it from our lives, because none of us can afford to have God oppose us!

But the problem we have is that pride is not always that easy to identify or recognize, and even though I’m sure it could easily be the topic for another book, I just want to cover a few areas of pride often encountered as we stand for the restoration of our marriages that we might not recognize as such.

First, I don’t know ANY stander, including myself, who is not guilty of trying to “figure everything out.” In fact, it’s just like God to put this topic in my heart to write about today, because I happen to be struggling with it personally quite a bit right now. So far this month, my husband has been unable to send the support he’s been sending for the past year, and without it, I’m unable to meet my financial obligations or keep this website and ministry afloat. So it seems perfectly natural and understandable that I’d feel that I NEED to DO something! But what? That’s the problem, I can’t think of any way to generate sufficient income for the ministry or to rearrange my finances so that I don’t have to rely on the support from my husband. And while I was trying to figure all of that out, I was forced to admit that even though I am extremely appreciative and grateful for his support, I don’t “like” having to rely on it, especially since I know it is such a big sacrifice for him, because he’s struggling financially too. So I have really had to fight my natural instincts to DO something; like use a credit card that I know I’d have a difficult time paying for later, or trying to get a second mortgage on my house if I can. The devil has really been trying to get me to think I have to take matters into my own hands and DO something!!! But I just keep hearing the Lord telling me to wait…be still and KNOW that I am GOD! Then yesterday, I paid my electric Bill, which was fortunately much lower than usual, because they had over estimated it for the past two months, and that pretty much wiped out my personal checking account, but I just kept reminding myself of the reassuring scripture verses that assure me that God will meet my needs and that I have to trust Him NO MATTER WHAT! And then yesterday afternoon when I came home from running some errands (paying my electric bill for one), there was a message from my husband saying he would be sending the money, and I thank the Lord for that! But I STILL wanted to “figure out” a way to keep this from happening again in the future, which sounds perfectly reasonable and what anyone would think they should do, especially since we’re supposed to let our spouses go when they want to go. Right? Well, in my case, the only problem with that is that the Lord has made it abundantly clear to me on several occasions that things are exactly as He wants them to be for the time being. I have made numerous attempts to do something to change it, and the Lord always closes the door very firmly. In fact, He slams it! So instead of trusting the Lord with my WHOLE heart, I struggle with “resting” in the place He seems to want me right now, where I (and this ministry) have to be completely reliant on my husband’s support. Despite knowing what the Lord has told me time and time again, I keep thinking there MUST be another way…if I could just figure it out! But that’s exalting my own understanding, will and ability above God’s, and that’s pride. And true humility is submitting our own will, understanding (even need to know and understand) and ways to the will and ways of God, with complete and utter trust and confidence that He WILL lift us up in due time (1 Peter 5:6-7), and that His Word and promises WILL ALWAYS prevail! The reason we try to figure things out is so we can figure out what the problem is and then what WE can do to “fix” it. Well, God wants us to trust Him and let HIM “fix” it! That’s not to say that we don’t try to resolve our problems, but when we’ve done our best and when we’ve been obedient to God’s Word, and nothing seems to be working, we have to just trust God. Even though we don’t think of it in these terms, Proverbs 3:5-6 is really about making a choice between doing what God requires by walking humbly with Him (Micah 6:8)or allowing the devil to create a stronghold in our lives by trying to exalt our own knowledge and ability over God’s (2 Corinthians 10:4-5) and failing to take every thought captive; making them obedient to Christ..

Another pride issue encountered by just about everyone standing for marriage restoration is our natural tendency to filter everything our spouses say and do through our own emotions and experience. We tend to project our own emotions and attitudes onto our spouses and evaluate their words and actions from that perspective. In other words, if we think our spouses have been mean, cruel, hurtful, or thoughtless, we’ll see everything they say and do as being intentionally mean, cruel, hurtful, or thoughtless, whether they are or not. If they’ve ever lied to us, we tend to question everything they say and look for evidence that they’re lying to us. If we feel guilt or shame about something, then we think they’re trying to make us feel guilty or shameful; “…just throwing that in my face” is a term I hear way too often. In other words, we’re unable to objectively evaluate and receive their words and actions, because we’re only seeing them through the lens and filter of our preconceived expectations. By doing that, we’re really just making everything all about us, and that’s pride. So our spouses don’t stand a chance, because it’s not possible to communicate with us effectively, and we’re certainly NOT demonstrating unconditional love, as it’s described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 or creating the atmosphere of grace that’s needed or redemption and restoration. So humbling ourselves in this case means making a decision to PRACTICE unconditional love as described at the above link, and to totally take our own emotions, needs and desires out of the equation when evaluating and responding to the things our spouses say and do. That means making a conscious and intentional choice to ALWAYS give our spouses the benefit of doubt. In fact, I made that decision about two years ago, and it made my life (and interaction with my husband) so much better, because now there’s no question about it; when something comes up that could go either way, either in his favor or against him; it’s already settled in his favor. It wasn’t easy at first, but it eventually became my FIRST reaction after a few times when I had to remind and force myself to honor that commitment. Doing that takes a very powerful weapon away from Satan, because he can’t torment us with a lot of “what ifs”, which is just another way we tend to lean and rely on our own understanding.

One more thing we often struggle to overcome as we stand for marriage restoration is our natural inclination to defend, explain, vindicate and protect ourselves. But as wives and husbands, we’re specifically told to follow the example set by Jesus in 1 Peter 2:23, which says When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. This is often overlooked as specific instruction to husbands and wives, but It is by no means insignificant that it is part of the passage that precedes the very important instructions for wives and husbands in 1 Peter 3, where both wives and husbands are told “in the same way…”, which is an obvious reference to the preceding passage! So as difficult as it is to understand and accept, even our natural need and tendency to defend, explain, vindicate, and protect ourselves is nothing but pride. And since God opposes the proud, that’s a very dangerous way to go, and as long as WE insist on doing it for ourselves, we’re obviously NOT entrusting ourselves to Him who judges justly!

So recognizing and overcoming pride in its various forms is very important to us as we stand for the restoration of our marriages, because besides being very destructive all on its own, it can keep us from experiencing the supernatural power of God in our lives and in the restoration of our marriages and in the softening of our spouses’ hearts. And even worse than that, it causes God to actually oppose us, so we have to take it very seriously and make sure we can identify it and eliminate it from every area of our lives. Fortunately, we can rely on John 8:32, which assures us Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” And once we recognize pride, we will be free to overcome it and we WILL be very blessed and encouraged by the results that brings about in our lives and the restoration of our marriages and families!

FAM Fellowship members stand in total awe and amazement as we continue to see the Lord pour out His love and power in our midst in ways far beyond our comprehension and understanding, and in ways far exceeding anything we could ask or imagine! So today I just want to give the Lord glory and praise for some of the things happening in our midst, and that’s IN JUST THIS WEEK…SO FAR!

On Monday, one of our members who received divorce papers just last month, was very surprised to get a call from her husband on the way home from work, asking “What’s for dinner!” Not only did he come to dinner, but he stayed for four hours, which is something he hasn’t done in a very long time! And even though he had said that he really wanted some home cooked food, he came knowing that she was just going to pick something up on the way home from work, because she had some errands to run and wouldn’t have time to cook! But that just means she now has a good reason to invite him back for dinner another time! She also shared that she had just started tithing again, which she hadn’t been doing, because she moved recently and hadn’t established a church home yet. And even though she didn’t see how it was possible to manage, she did that in obedience and then trusted the Lord. And now, in addition to this awesome praise report, she also shared how many ways the Lord has since blessed her with totally unexpected income! God’s Word NEVER fails and He NEVER lets us down!

Also on Monday, another member’s husband came to see her twice, spending a total of five hours with her. He was back again for three hours yesterday and plans to take the kids on an outing on his own today, which is something he hasn’t done since leaving. And for the first time, he acknowledged that he could see the pain of what has happened in their eyes and hear it in their voices, and he said that, starting today, he’s going to DO something about that! And it looks like he means that, because it’s probably not insignificant that he has started leaving his tools there, along with dropping off some other material for his business, which he could certainly leave at the NCP’s house! AND then yesterday, when he was creating a resume for a job he really wants, he didn’t use the NCP’s home address; instead he asked to use his wife’s address! Yes, Lord, that’s definitely another husband on the way home!!!

Then yesterday, one of our members whose husband had recently asked her to buy a house and move out (something she certainly didn’t want to do, but had agreed to do in submission to him, while trusting the Lord to stop it if not HIS will), saw a lot of totally unexpected and unpredictable things come up to delay the closing! First, her husband had originally said he wanted a divorce, and has since said they’d just separate and start dating again, and see where that goes. Well, in order to qualify for a mortgage, they had to have some kind of legal settlement agreement in place, which they were supposed to sign last night. But that didn’t happen, because her husband got stuck working late! Also, they found out yesterday that her husband has to pay off the lease on the car he drives (it’s in her name), in order for her to qualify for the loan on her new house, even though they had originally been told that an affidavit stating that he makes the payments would suffice! And as part of the settlement, her husband is taking out a loan on their current home and giving her half of the equity, which is what she’s using to buy her new house. But the closing on his new loan was put off to the end of the week, which means her closing will have to be postponed for the second time, and that is not going to make the seller very happy! And as if all that weren’t enough, on top of everything else, she found out yesterday that as the result of abnormal mammogram results, she now has to have a biopsy! Needless to say, that really throws a monkey wrench into the situation, and while there’s no telling what God is up to, we know it’s got to be something GOOD!

Then another member’s husband was coming to dinner at home last night for the first time since he left, but she’s in another time zone, so I haven’t heard how that went yet. I fully expect it to be another praise report though, because he only just started coming around again about two weeks ago, and engages in “normal” conversation with her now for the first time in ages too! Also, while she was out of town the weekend before last, he came home and did some yard work, which he used to love doing and hadn’t taken an interest in doing since leaving! And he was the one to ask if they could get together this week “to discuss property and expense issues…”, but this was the first time he ever accepted an invitation to eat there! This is so exciting, because this is how restoration often begins! Now that the Lord has re-established contact with her husband, he WILL see the changes the Lord has made in her and be totally captivated by his new wife!
Update: I’ve had a chance to talk to this member and as I expected, she does have a great praise report! When they talked about it two weeks ago, her husband was set on selling the house and dividing up an account they had set aside for home repairs. But last night he actually asked her what she’d prefer to do and she told him that after taking some time away to visit her family and having more time to think about it, she’d rather stay in the house. To her surprise, he told her that he thought that was the “right” decision, AND he said they’d go ahead and start using some of the money in the account to make some house repairs! Now that’s quite a turn around in two weeks, and ONLY GOD COULD DO THAT!

Then another member was blessed by her husband’s presence with the family on Mother’s Day, when he cooked a wonderful dinner for them and they enjoyed a very special day together. And he even opened his arms to her for a hug before he left! But the BIG news is that he’s considering going away with her Friday for the weekend – just the two of them. He had originally said he would go, because he thought the kids were going, but when he found out they weren’t, he changed his mind. Then he offered to buy her a ticket so she could fly instead of taking the train, which she declined, because she
thought she’d enjoy the train. But he called her back Monday night and said he’s changed his mind again, and he thinks he will go! So we’re all praying that nothing causes him to change his mind again and that this will be a wonderful time of reconnecting and restoration for them! He’s been gone for several years, and this is a HUGE change in his attitude…but then his wife has changed a lot too! And this member also shared with me yesterday that she had just made a renewed commitment to tithing as well, and now money was coming in from all sorts of unexpected places…not to mention this wonderful praise report! Our God is so faithful and awesome! He just wants us to trust and obey!

Then this Saturday, one of our members will be having lunch with his wife for the first time in well over a year! After a year of little contact, other than necessary communication concerning bills and the kids, out of the blue, his wife just started sending “chatty’ email messages a couple of weeks ago, and they started communicating on a much more regular and personal basis; and all of this, as the time for the final dissolution of their marriage rapidly approaches! Based on one of her messages indicating that she might be reconsidering her decision to get a divorce, he asked her to spend some time with him so she could get to know the new man he has become before going through with the divorce…and asked her to go to lunch with him while she’s in town this weekend, and even said she could stay at his apartment if she needs a place to stay. She arrives tomorrow, but has not said anything about where she will be staying, but she did suggest that they go to their favorite place for lunch! She has acknowledged several times that she sees the changes God has made in him, so we’re praying that she too will fall in love with the new and improved husband the Lord has blessed her with!

Then another one of our members, whose husband just agreed to drop the divorce a few weeks ago, but who said he’s not quite ready to move home yet, because he’s scared (probably that the changes he sees in her won’t last), spent Mother’s Day with his family and actually apologized to his wife for being afraid to come home just yet. But she took that opportunity to reassure him that it was okay, and that he was worth the wait! What a blessing it has been for all of us to see how the Lord has worked in the restoration of their love, marriage and family! And we all know and are seeing proof that what he has done for one, He WILL do for all!

And finally, one of our members whose husband remarried last year, has experienced a significant change in their relationship too. They usually only communicate about their small child, but he’s started calling a lot more often and just to talk; often reminiscing about good times from their past. They met briefly over the weekend at a midway point when he returned their son, and he called less than an hour later (they had stopped at a restaurant and the NCP was obviously not at the table) to tell her that she really looked good! Then he called her again the next day to wish her a happy Mother’s Day and again told her several times how good she looked! And he wanted to know if she had noticed that he had lost quite a bit of weight as well, which she acknowledged and said he looked good too! Despite everything we don’t know, it’s obvious that she is on his mind a LOT! So it will be very interesting to see what God will do in their situation!

There’s no doubt that the recent and continuous restoration miracles experienced in the lives of FAM Fellowship members bear witness to the powerful truth of God’s Word, especially Revelation 12:10-11, which says Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say: “Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Christ. For the accuser of our brothers, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death. And not one of us could possibly doubt the awesome power of praise, because we’ve seen such amazing proof of it in our midst and we KNOW that God truly inhabits the praises of His people, or as Psalm 22:3 puts it: But You are holy, Enthroned in the praises of Israel. And even as we give God the glory for the great things He HAS already done and continues to do, we only just begin to understand the awesome promise found in Ephesians 3:19-20, which says Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. And the more we come to understand and recognize the awesome power of God that is at work within us, the more blessed and encouraged we’ll be!

One of the most frustrating aspects of marriage restoration ministry is the realization that there is little (if any) difference between the “Christian” view of marriage and the “secular” concept of marriage. In fact, the majority of churches today support a totally secular view of marriage, and no longer even acknowledge that there is a difference between what should be the Christian approach to marriage and the world’s approach. So whatever the world says goes, even in our churches!

Sadly, I found myself in the awkward position of having to respond to an email message this morning, in which it was stated that a woman was standing for the restoration of her marriage; that it was her second marriage…”but neither of them were saved when they got married.” So, what does that have to do with anything? Unfortunately, it’s a reflection of what is generally taught and accepted in most “secular-Christian” churches today, despite EVERYTHING else the Bible says about marriage, divorce, and remarriage; especially the following totally unambiguous statements from Jesus Himself:

Matthew 5:32
But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.

Matthew 19:9
I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

I have a difficult time figuring out what is so complicated about these verses! Jesus made it abundantly clear…remarriage after divorce by ANYONE for ANY reason other than adultery IS adultery! I’d just like to know exactly where in the Bible we find something that leads us to believe Jesus didn’t mean what He said or He didn’t know what He was talking about. ABSOLUTELY NO WHERE! No matter WHAT is written anywhere else in the Bible, it can NOT be RIGHTLY interpreted to mean something so totally contrary to the words spoken by our Lord and Savior Himself, who told us that the words He spoke, came from God. In John 14:24, Jesus very specifically said He who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words
you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me. And let it NOT be forgotten that the question Jesus was answering when He made these very clear and precise statements about GOD’S LAW governing divorce and remarriage, as stated in Matthew 19:3, was Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” And after reminding them that from the beginning God created marriage as a one flesh, life long covenant relationship, He said that marital unfaithfulness was the ONLY exception that released a man or woman to remarry without committing adultery in the
eyes of God.

I know it must break our Lord’s heart and stir up the wrath of God to see how so many prominent “men (and women) of God” pervert the very plain meaning of His words to promote and justify the acceptance of adulterous marriages, even in HIS church. While there are many examples of passages of scripture frequently twisted to support such erroneous conclusions, one not covered here in much detail before is 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV), which says Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Yet, when that verse is read in its full context in 2 Corinthians 5, it’s obvious that it does NOT attempt to say in ANY way that our past just disappears and we no longer have any accountability for it, because it’s forgotten and we get to start life all over again with a clean slate. Instead, it’s very clearly a reference to our transition from the sinful state of our fleshly bodies into our spiritual state of reconciliation with God through the blood of Jesus Christ, which is further clarified in this commentary by Matthew Henry. And even more importantly, as is always the case, that meaning is confirmed by the Bible itself in Revelation 21.

However, that is in no way meant to deny the fact that when we become Christians and REPENT (meaning to turn from our sinful ways and sin no more); our sins ARE forgiven AND forgotten. We certainly have a beautiful illustration of that in Isaiah 55, but we can NOT claim or rely on this awesome promise and the grace of God’s forgiveness without true and genuine repentance, as described in Isaiah 55:7, which says Let the wicked forsake his way and the evil man his thoughts. Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him, and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

So despite the contrary opinion of man, NO man made law concerning GOD’S HOLY COVENANT of marriage has the power or authority to invalidate God’s Word and law to transform the sin of adultery into something honorable and approved by God. In fact, the bible makes it very clear in Hebrews 10, that we play a very dangerous game when we try to pervert God’s precious gift of grace by trying to use it as a license to continue sinning, especially the following verses:
26 If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left,
27 but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God.
28 Anyone who rejected the law of Moses died without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses.
29 How much more severely do you think a man deserves to be punished who has trampled the Son of God under foot, who has treated as an unholy thing the blood of the covenant that sanctified him, and who has insulted the Spirit of grace?
30 For we know him who said, “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” and again, “The Lord will judge his people.”

So basing the belief that a second marriage is not adultery, if the couple is not saved when they’re married, on God’s grace and the forgiveness of sin doesn’t work, because the only way to have forgiveness of sin is to repent, which means to discontinue the sin…just like Jesus told the woman caught in adultery – “go and sin no more.” And even though society and churches today have effectively created a special class for the sin of adultery, that is TOTALLY contrary to the Word and not supported anywhere in
the Bible.

Additional Bible references that dispel the myth and make it very clear that “all things new” does NOT mean that we start with a clean slate and no longer have consequences or accountability to man or God for our past sins and misdeeds, are found in the examples in the Bible of those who made amends and restitution for their former sins and wrong doings; such as Zacchaeus in Luke 19:1-10, and even returned to fulfill their former obligations, like Onesimus in Philemon 1, who was a slave and had to return to his master. We can’t take any verse or passage of scripture and try to apply it with a meaning that is so totally contrary to what so many other verses teach. The Bible NEVER disputes
itself and it ALWAYS explains itself! So when the meaning someone comes up
with is contrary to the plain meaning of other scripture, that meaning is
wrong; plain and simple, because the Bible does not contradict itself. But
most people are not willing to accept what they don’t want to hear and would
rather make the Bible say what it never said and never meant to say, which
is why Jesus warns us in Matthew 7:13-14 “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it. And how sad but true Proverbs 14:12 is, because it says There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.

So the fact that those of us standing for our marriages obviously have an unpopular and minority opinion concerning the sanctity of marriage, should not discourage or deter us in any way, because we have the power of God’s Word backing us up, and NOTHING can stand against that or us! When we seek to understand God’s Word and apply it to our lives as we stand for the restoration of our marriages and families, we WILL know the joy of having Psalm 37:4-6 manifested in our marriages and in our lives and we will truly be blessed and encouraged, because it promises Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

One of the FAM Fellowship members recently shared the following message about understanding the hardness of our spouses’ hearts on the private website, and since this is something that affects just about everyone standing for marriage restoration, I appreciate her permission to share it here. Unfortunately, that’s something Amy knows about all too well. She has three small children, who quite frequently cry for their daddy, and she lost her home and everything else when her husband left them. His destructive lifestyle ended up costing him his business as well, so now Amy and her kids live with her parents in very cramped quarters, because he’s unable to support himself, much less his family. Sadly, many men and women standing for marriage restoration have similar testimonies and have suffered the consequences of hardened hearts as well. So, as we read Amy’s message and Hardness of Heart: A Roadblock to Receiving from God, the article by Andrew Wommack that Amy quotes from, let’s make sure that our own hearts aren’t hardened, and continually pray for the Lord to give our spouses new hearts; hearts of flesh, as described in Ezekiel 36:26, which says I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And since stony, hardened hearts are at the root of most marital problems, we all should be greatly blessed and encouraged to know what to pray for more specifically, especially since we can trust the Lord to honor our prayers and turn our spouses’ hearts, as we see in Proverbs 21:1, which says The king’s heart is in the hand of the LORD, Like the rivers of water; He turns it wherever He wishes. Now here’s Amy’s message:

Last night I was watching Andrew Wommack and wrote down his website, which I checked out this morning. God had so much to share with me on the website that I knew it had to be shared here as well.

First, let’s talk about hardness of hearts. We all know that our spouses’ hearts have been hardened. But do we really understand? Let me share what Andrew Wommack had to say about that:

Jesus came walking to His disciples on the water, recorded in Mark 6:45-52. They were in a terrible storm. After nine hours they were still only halfway across the Sea of Galilee, normally a two-hour trip. They were in trouble and fighting for their lives. Yet here came Jesus walking on top of the very thing that was trying to kill them. He was totally in control.

In Mark 6:51 it says “They were sore amazed in themselves beyond measure, and wondered.” and in the next verse it follows with “For they considered not the miracle of the loaves: for their heart was hardened.”

Andrew continues with:
God made us so that we can harden our hearts and literally shut out unwanted influences. It was meant to be a positive thing, but because we haven’t understood this, what God meant for good has actually worked against us.

One of the benefits of understanding what causes hardheartedness is that you can reverse this process and use it to become hardened against the devil. That is absolutely true.

Yes, our spouses’ hearts have been hardened. They can’t see, hear, understand, or even remember! Oh wow, how many times have you gotten frustrated with your spouse’s words or actions? I know I have numerous times! But why? Because just like our spouses, there are areas in all of our lives where we need to get rid of that hardened heart. We are focusing on our circumstances at that instant and not remembering what mighty power our Lord has! WE are not remembering! We have to stop focusing on our circumstances and start focusing on God’s promises. Who cares what they say or do. Has one of your children ever done something that you know could have seriously hurt them, but they just did not know better? What did you do? I’m sure you rushed over to your child and taught him/her that doing that could really hurt. Maybe they did it again and the next time you might be a little more stern, but still understanding that this is a child who sometimes forgets or just doesn’t get it completely. Our spouses are doing things that are very harmful to themselves and their families. That’s ok; they may not get it; they may not know right now, but God isn’t going to stand by and let them continue to do this over and over. Have faith that every time, He is rushing to them; reminding them; and teaching them. Eventually they WILL get it; they WILL remember; and they WILL stop doing those things that are so damaging. They WILL learn! And just as it may take time for our children to remember and understand, it will also take time for God’s children to remember and understand.

It is still easy for us to fall into Satan’s traps; to give in to his whispers and lies at times. Our hearts still harden up here and there. Would you step out of that boat? I am betting that just maybe there might be a little fear there. The world tells us that stepping out would have us end up at the bottom of the ocean! I know it would run through my head. Even with Jesus standing right there! Right now our spouses are sitting in that boat, in the midst of that storm. They have on their life jackets; those floaties are on their arms; the goggles are on their eyes, and they aren’t moving. In their minds, they don’t understand; they don’t remember; they are stuck and they see no way out of this, even with Jesus standing right there. But eventually Jesus will calm the storm for them and they will see more clearly; some of them may even walk on water! But ALL of them will make it to the other side. Praise God!