I Learned to Stay Humble, Stay Obedient and Stay in Faith! by Nik
(Note from Linda: This powerful Marriage Restoration Testimony was shared on the private FAM Fellowship website over the weekend, and since it has so many powerful and VITALLY IMPORTANT messages for every man and woman standing for marriage restoration, I want to share it here as well. When I talked to Nik after she posted this, I was really struck by something she reminded me of from our first conversation; which she said had a tremendous impact on her and that it came to her mind over and over again. Her husband apparently believed that there was nothing wrong with indulging in casual sexual relationships and that she shouldn’t have a problem with that or be offended by it…and that despite that he also professed and acted as if he had a strong relationship with the Lord. Needless to say, Nik did have a problem with that and was quite upset and confused. She ended up asking him to leave and then proceeded to do all she could to “straighten him out.” Of course, as
we all know, that doesn’t work, which just made her angrier and even more frustrated. So I urged her to focus a lot more on prayer, trusting that God could do what she couldn’t do and told her that her behavior and attitude toward her husband was like trying to clean a fish before catching it. When we talk about unconditional love, it really does have to be UNCONDITIONAL; as demonstrated so powerfully in Romans 5:8, which says…But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. And as we’re told in Proverbs 19:22…What a man desires is unfailing love…. So Nik focused on letting the Lord do the work that had to be done in her during the time of no contact with her husband and trusted that God would do what needed to be done in him. I was especially touched and impressed by how she COVERED him when he was about to make an excuse about why he couldn’t join her and their son that day—she REALLY let him go and GOD honored and blessed her faith and humility and moved SUPERNATURALLY in her husband’s heart! She really did learn and understand the SUPERNATURAL POWER AND PROMISE of humility (1 Peter 5:5-8), obedience (Luke 6:46-49 and John 14:23) and faith (John 15:7Matthew 9:19 and Hebrews 10:38 and Hebrews 11:6)! Nik also shared in a lot more detail what she had to do to overcome her flesh to learn humility, obedience and to walk in faith, which she has promised to share more about in an upcoming post, and I’ll share that here as well when she does, because it is in the DOING of what God’s Word teaches that we find the hope and victory it promises! So read Nik’s powerful Restored Marriage Testimony and take the valuable lessons she learned to heart, because what God does for one, He WILL do for all and when we just learn as Nik did to STAY humble, STAY obedient and STAY in faith, we will indeed be blessed and encouraged beyond belief!)
Hi FAMM Family!
It is with great joy in my heart and praise in my mouth that I write this post and share my praise and testimony. I am so encouraged and thankful for the blessings that God has bestowed on my family. I joke a bit when I tell people that it takes four ministers to counsel me each week, but for the past ten months that has been my reality because I was so consumed by disappointment, hurt and anger that I had to CONSTANTLY combat it with the Word of God.
When my husband and I separated, things were so bad that our pride made us both feel that silence and no contact with each other was the best approach, and we went six months without a word to each other. As time went on, I prayed diligently that God would soften my heart and give me the courage to continue to stand for my marriage. And I had absolutely no one to rely on except the wonderful Seeds Of Faith posts and your praise and restored marriage testimonies. They were (and still are) so reassuring that God still sits on the throne! And no one can deliver from His righteous hand and no one can cancel the work He performs (Isaiah 43:13)!
While getting ready for church a few months back, I heard Joel Osteen teaching a message on being closer than you think and the bells chimed! He gave an example of climbing a mountain for sport, and the closer he came to the top, the more difficult the climb got. But just as he was about to give up, a man who was heading down the mountain said five simple words to him that really helped…”You’re closer than you think!” I held on to that message, and planted that seed in my heart. After all, Zechariah 9:12 tells us to return to our stand and be prisoners of hope because God will restore us double. And it’s important for all of us to realize and confirm that God is not a respecter of persons. If He can restore one marriage, He can restore them all. We must simply humble ourselves to His authority and stand in obedience!! So stay in faith!!
Each day I could feel my anger dissipate and my heart soften towards my husband. And back in January, I was sowing seed into a ministry when I felt God telling me to make the gift in both my husband’s and my name. Even though I laughed a bit and wondered what for; I was obedient. And two weeks later my husband sent me a text message, saying to contact him if I needed anything. We hadn’t spoken in 4 months and I didn’t recognize the number, so I thought it was a wrong number. But God kept pressing on my heart that it was my husband; yet I never responded to the text message. Then about three weeks later, I sent him an email message regarding our son, and within an hour, he responded. We made plans for him to visit our son, but he didn’t show. I knew the enemy would have me reclaim my anger, but I praised God and confirmed that our next meeting would go as planned and be all the more powerful instead! Then one week later, I called him at work and told him that I would be out his way visiting my in-laws if he wanted to drop by. And I didn’t even mention the prior meeting we had arranged, which meant nothing to me because I already knew God was at work. When we go from silence to speaking, we KNOW it’s GOD! He started to give me excuses about why he couldn’t make it, so I stopped him and told him kindly that we would love to see him but totally understood if he couldn’t make it. I actually heard him exhale and could swear I heard him smile. It’s funny because God had already revealed to me how the day would go, so I didn’t even bat an eye when he started to decline my invitation. I know God doesn’t give us desires in our hearts unless he plans to bring them forth, and I knew that in and of myself, I could not repair or restore my marriage.
My husband ended up taking a half day off from work to spend the day with us and we have been together ever since!!! So our family was restored on March 6, 2009! And if you could read the notes in my Bible, you would see that I declared the enemy defeated on June 19, 2008!!! But it took nine months for my declaration to be made manifest because of my pride! So please trust me on that one! It’s only by God’s grace and my trust in Him, that my family is restored. I was ready to give up, but His ways are not our ways!! If God tells us to stand, then that’s what we do! No matter what things look like or feel like…and no matter who stands with us! God is with us, so who can be against us (Romans 8:31)?
As soon as I put away my pride, hurt and anger, God moved in my life! My barriers were blocking my blessings. And Every event God has spoken to me about has come to pass in these past few months and my total trust is in Him!! Praise God! So I stand committed to my full and complete restoration. I know that what God has joined together NO MAN can put asunder (Mark 10:9)! And I know that He will complete the work He has begun in us (Philippians 1:6)! And we are commanded to set aside old habits, happenings and hurts (Isaiah 43:18)!
Standing alone for any cause can be a very lonely time and experience, and the world will count us out; BUT it’s not over until GOD says it’s over! The scars can sting, but they can’t destroy us. Praise be to God! One day last November, I actually heard someone refer to me as my husband’s “ex-wife”…which I thought was possible since I didn’t respond to the divorce papers I was served with; I just threw them in the trash because I knew that based on God’s promises to me, that’s all they were! But I learned that the enemy is CONSTANTLY seeking to devour and cast doubt in our minds. And unless we’re CONSTANTLY upholding the shield of faith, we will get weary and knocked down. So we have to stay encouraged and stay in faith!! If God told us to stand for our marriages, then that’s what we are to do until He tells us otherwise…even when we don’t want to, even when we are tired and most especially, even when we feel like giving up! And Linda can definitely attest to the fact that I’m speaking from experience!
So be a prisoner of hope, stay humbled and stay in faith!!! I love you and pray for all of us! OUR GOD IS STILL ON THE THRONE!!! Linda, please move us to the Restored Marriage list! Praise be to God!!!